


escapism

by applesauce6



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Adora (She-Ra) Needs a Hug, Adora (She-Ra) is a Dork, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Catra (She-Ra) Needs a Hug, Catra Draws, Catra Goes to Therapy (She-Ra), Catra Has Issues (She-Ra), Catra is a Singer, Drama & Romance, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Healing, Human Catra (She-Ra), Jock Adora (She-Ra), Lesbian Adora (She-Ra), Lesbian Catra (She-Ra), Lesbian Disaster Adora (She-Ra), Mental Health Issues, Minor Original Character(s), Oblivious Adora (She-Ra), Poor Catra (She-Ra), Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-04
Updated: 2021-01-31
Packaged: 2021-03-14 04:47:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 29
Words: 67,836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28539810
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/applesauce6/pseuds/applesauce6
Summary: Depression is something that sadly, many people have to face. In this story, Catra is a victim who suffers by the hands of depression. To escape from the cruel reality that the universe has set for her, she uses her passion for art and music to escape. Though, it may sound ridiculous, to Catra, the only reason she is still existing on this planet is the fact that she can draw and play music freely. However, when a friendly blonde girl comes along, maybe there’s another thing to add to her list to stay? Just another Catradora modern / college au TW: talks about depression
Relationships: Adora/Catra (She-Ra), Bow & Glimmer (She-Ra), Mermista/Sea Hawk (She-Ra), Netossa/Spinnerella (She-Ra), Perfuma/Scorpia (She-Ra)
Comments: 350
Kudos: 310





	1. eyes locked

Throughout periods of someone’s life, everyone has experienced sadness before. Whether it was because you lost a loved one, a breakup, or just simply because your favorite sport’s team lost a game. Sadness is a normal reaction to loss, disappointment, or problems that one will eventually come across. Being down from time to time is just the experience of being human, even though it may seem inconvenient. In most cases, sadness can go away easily and a person can continue their daily lives. But it’s not so simple for everyone. 

Depression is a mental illness that affects one’s mood, the way someone understands themself and the way they can understand and relate to things around them. It’s much more than sadness or feeling down on oneself. Being depressed is like being lost at sea with rough waters, trying to survive with no hope of rescue, but knowing that you will eventually run out of energy soon, and eventually one wave is going to be enough for you to sink under. 

Some of the victims who suffer from depression, sometimes find themselves participating in hobbies, such as music and art, to be able to find an escape from reality. It might sound silly, but these hobbies could be the objects that tie a thin string to keep one from exiting this world. 

At least, that was the case for Catra.

  
  
  


There was a soft melody that bounced off of the walls of the dorm room. Catra quietly hummed to herself as she individually plucked the strings of her acoustic guitar with her fingers. She looked over at her alarm clock, it was 9:55 am. The girl groaned to herself and reluctantly got out of bed to get ready to start her day. 

Golden brown and sharp blue eyes stared back at her. Catra leaned down and splashed her face with cold water after she stared at her groggy reflection. Lethargically, she changed out of her pajamas and put on gray sweatpants, an old highschool sweater, and placed a black cap on her head. Catra sourly stared at her tired self again before she walked out her door, holding her backpack.

The walk to the lecture hall was tedious, not only was it so far from Catra’s dorm, but there were so many people; it was too loud for the girl. Ironically, the brunette took out her airpods and plugged them in her ears, blasting rock music. Catra tilted her cap, shielding her face from passing students, she wasn’t in the mood to talk to anyone. Like anyone would talk to  _ her _ though.

Catra walked into her lecture hall and sat in the back of the room, she made sure to take at least one airpod out of her ear, just so she could get some idea of what’s happening in her class. The brunette rested her chin on her hand as she listened to Professor Netossa ramble on about their next art project. 

“...now this is a group project everyone!” Professor Netossa announced, Catra lifted up her head and scowled at the fact that she had to work with others, “You all are dismissed! Make sure to email me who is in your group! See you on Wednesday!”

The brunette peered around the room as she saw her classmates mingle with one another, “Ugh,” she scoffed, “There’s no way I’m going to working with shitheads like them,” she looked down and saw her professor packing up her papers, “Can’t believe I’m going to be doing this,” she rolled her eyes to herself.

Catra quickly scrambled as she packed her bags, she ran down the stairs and towards her professor, “Hey Professor Netossa? I have a question,” she said in her friendliest voice. 

The woman took off her glasses and smiled at her student, “Ask away kiddo.”

“Is it okay if I work on the project myself?” The girl pointed her thumb behind her, “I don’t really get along with any of my classmates and to be frank, I don’t want my grade to drop because of that.” 

Professor Netossa rubbed her chin and thought for a second, “Hm… I’ll allow it just this once. Though I am happy that you came up to me today,” Catra raised an eyebrow as she saw the woman take out a couple of papers, “I am curious about your last art assignment,” she handed paper over to Catra, “I was just wondering… is everything okay with you?”

“Everything’s fine,” Catra replied swiftly. She stared at the paper her professor handed to her, it was one of her previous works. The assignment was to quickly sketch out how you feel at the moment. On Catra’s paper was a masked figure, covering their face with one hand that had blood trickling down on it, tears dripping down one side of their face as they slowly started to fade away into nothingness. 

The girl handed the picture back with an obviously fake smile on her face, “I think I did a good job on it, don’t you?” She joked.

Her professor let out a forced laugh, “No, you did great,” she took back the assignment and placed it on her desk, “You know, the thing that’s great about art is that it shows how you really feel when you sketch,” the woman sighed, “I’m sorry if I’m intruding, but it seems to me that you’re not really doing so well. At least that was what I interpreted from your work of art.”

There was an awkward silence in the lecture hall, Catra looked down as she fiddled with her feet. “No,” the brunette looked back up, “everything is fine professor, that piece was actually inspired by a movie I watched a week or so before the assignment was due.”

She raised an eyebrow, “Which movie?”

Catra laughed, “It’s a pretty underrated film, I’m not sure if you know it Professor,” she looked at Netossa who just stared back at her, waiting for a proper answer, “ _ Avengers: Infinity War, _ ” the student joked. 

“Very well,” Professor Netossa laughed, “But, I do hope you know that I will be here for you if you are going through any difficulties,” she gave Catra a confident smile, “Afterall I’m your professor!” 

Catra smiled back and nodded. She turned around and started to head out of the lecture hall. “Oh Catra! Say ‘hi’ to Spinny for me will you? You have her class in two hours right?” 

The brunette turned around and gave her a thumbs up, “Yep, will do,” she quickly walked out of the class and shut the door closed behind her. The girl let out a shaky breath as she slid down the wall,

“I thought acting would be easier.”

  
  
  


Catra decided to have a moment of peace before her next class. She walked over to a bench underneath a shady oak tree and sat down there. The girl took out her drawing notebook and a couple of pens out of her bag, then allowed her mind to control where the ink would travel on the paper.

A good 20 minutes passed and Catra looked down at her drawing. On her paper was a rough sketch of a thin boney figure doing the child’s pose, their skeleton hands covering their ears. Catra sighed to herself as she remembered what her professor had told her before. 

_ You know, the thing that’s great about art is that it shows how you really feel when you sketch _

The woman’s voice rang in Catra’s ear. She shook her head to ignore it and stared at her drawing again, “I’ll just add some shading to it, then it’ll look  _ so _ much better.”

She gently started to darken some areas on her paper when she heard footsteps coming towards her, Catra looked up and saw a short girl with cotton candy hair, along with a boy in a crop top, guiding a blonde girl who she’s never seen before. 

_ Just when I thought I would have some peace and quiet,  _ Catra thought,  _ Sparkles and Arrow Boy have the fucking nerve to show up here. Who the fuck is that other girl anyways?  _

The girl covered her face with her hat when the trio walked by her. She silently looked up and her mismatched eyes met with the blonde girl’s gorgeous gray-blue eyes. Her eyes widened and she quickly looked down to avoid any contact. Though, she could still feel the mystery girl’s eyes linger on her.

“Adora you coming?” 

Catra felt the gaze of the girl shift away from her, “Huh? Oh yeah, wait up!” the girl’s cheery voice spoke out.

The brunette looked back up and watched as the girl’s back disappeared from her view as she walked into the cafeteria. Catra scratched her cheek,

“Adora huh?”

  
  
  


She looked at her finished product of her drawing and nodded at it, “Y’know it’s not that bad…” she muttered to herself. Catra squinted her eyes, “I take it back, the more I look at it the worse it gets.” The brunette looked at her watch, “Shit, my next lecture is in 30 minutes, good thing we didn’t need to bring instruments today or I’ll be so fucking late,” her stomach grumbled, “I guess I should get a snack or something though, I skipped breakfast again…” 

The college student walked into the cafetiera and glanced around, “There’s so many people,” she huffed, her eyes widened when she set sight on a familiar girl with a stylish platinum undercut laughing with probably one of her  _ new _ friends. She jumped and hid behind a pillar, “What is  _ she _ doing here?”

The girl took a couple of deep breaths to calm herself down, “Relax Catra,” she muttered to herself, “It’s the cafeteria _of_ _course_ you’ll see some of them here,” she cautiously looked around and tilted her hat lower, “Just gotta keep a low profile I guess.” 

As stealthily as she could, Catra walked over to the counter as she felt hundreds of eyes on her. Goosebumps crept up on her neck and she rashly grabbed a red apple from a basket and was ready to bolt the fuck out of the building. 

Catra sped walked towards the exit, but out of nowhere, someone came out from behind one of the pillars and slammed right into her, the force of the person knocking them both right onto the ground, along with the belongings that Catra was carrying, “Can you watch where you’re going?” Catra snapped, rubbing her elbow that hit the floor.

“Oh my god I’m  _ so _ sorry!” A familiar voice called out in distress. Catra looked up and saw the blonde girl from earlier. Adora right? The blonde hastily stood up and reached out a hand towards Catra, “Here, let me help you up.”

The brunette ignored the offer and stood up on her own, dusting her clothes off, “I’m fine,” she said in a low voice. She looked up and once again, her own mismatched eyes were locked onto the girl’s gray-blue eyes.

“Adora are you okay?” a high-pitched voice said, shattering the trance that her and Adora were in. Suddenly, Glimmer and Bow came running up to the girl’s side. Glimmer looked coldly at Catra, “What are  _ you _ doing here Catra?” 

Bow looked around, “Hey Glimm, let’s not cause a scene,” he said cautiously. 

Catra looked around and low and behold, a scene was already caused. There were eyes on them,  _ too _ many eyes to be precise. The brunette’s hands started to shake as she looked around the room, she met eyes with the girl with the platinum undercut. Her old friend, Scorpia. That was the final straw for her. She quickly picked up her fallen items and ran out of the cafeteria without looking back. 

Glimmer scoffed, “Not even an apology, typical Catra.”

Adora looked at the doors who were still swinging when Catra ran out of them, “Catra,” she echoed, she turned back to her two friends and smiled, “Do you guys know her? She seems so cool! I saw her when we were walking towards the cafeteria and she was drawing something, I only glanced a bit at the drawing, but it was so  _ beautiful _ ! Plus, her eyes look so pretty! I’ve never seen anyone with heterochromia before!” 

The boy placed a hand on Adora’s shoulder, “Adora… Catra is-”

“Terrible,” Glimmer finished, “She’s the worst person in the school,” Adora raised an eyebrow at her friend, “She’s so toxic and manipulative, that’s why she’s always alone, she’s lost all of her friends.”

The blonde girl smiled, “Well maybe  _ I _ can be her friend then!”

Bow awkwardly laughed when he practically saw a vein in Glimmer’s forehead pop, “Heh… Adora, I know you’re new at BMU, but Catra  _ isn’t _ a person you want to mess with. I know you mean well and want to be her friend, but she’s just… not the right match for you,” he smiled at the confused girl, “You’re nice and sweet and Catra is well…”

Glimmer scoffed again, “A lost cause, there’s nothing you can do to fix what a terrible person Catra is, trust me okay?” Adora frowned and Glimmer sighed and placed the girl’s hand in her own, “Look, just promise me you won’t go after her, it’s for your own good.”

Adora sighed and took her hands out of Glimmer’s grip. She looked up at her two new friends and smiled, “Yeah, okay, I trust you guys. I won’t bother with Catra.”

The boy smiled, “Great! Now come on, the cafeteria food at Brightmoon is actually pretty good, and I’m starving!”

Glimmer smiled, “Yes, I know you are babe.”

The trio started to get in line for food and Adora stood behind the lovey dovey couple as they started to chatter. She looked down at her fingers, which were crossed, and smirked craftily.

_ Sorry Glimmer,  _ Adora thought,  _ I’m not usually one to break a promise, but I’m afraid those mismatched eyes of Catra’s already entranced me.  _

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New year new story! Whew I had a great hiatus! I spent so much time to myself, reading, learning the drums, playing games, and just hanging out with my family for the holidays! Even though we are only three days in, I hope the new year is treating all of you well! When I first started my brainstorming for my fanfics, this storyline was one of the first ideas that popped up to my head. Throughout the stories I’ve been writing, I’ve always been keeping this one in my mind and kept adding onto my ideas. I started this idea because I really wanted to like just write a relatable (ish) story for those who are suffering from depression and to just make a story about someone who is healing from depression. I really wanted to bring light into this subject because it is very important to me and I just want to let people know that they are worth living and that everything will be okay. (I’m SO sorry if that sounds ignorant in any way please correct me if it is offensive) Anyways this story is inspired a bit by the song “Escapism” from the TV show Steven Universe, which fun fact is actually sung by Catra’s voice actress AJ. Oh and in this story, I’m making it so that Catra is the one who wrote this song herself haha. Anyways I hope you guys enjoyed this first chapter of this story and please leave a comment down below and feel free to share any opinions and/or constructive criticism! Hope you guys all have a great morning/afternoon/evening!


	2. a siren song

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a glimpse of adora's past

_ The old wooden floor creaked beneath Adora’s feet as she crept around the old cottage house that her and her guardian, Razz, shared together. Around the house were beautiful pink and lavender flowers that Razz had grown herself, settling nicely in woven baskets. Adora leaned forward and breathed in the floral scent of one of the blossoms.  _

_ “Mara dearie!” Razz called out from the kitchen, “Dinner is ready!” _

_ The girl sighed to herself as she turned the corner, walking into the small kitchen, “Razz, I told you before, my name is Adora,” she walked over to the table and pulled out a chair to sit on. Razz ignored her and hummed to herself as she scooped out a couple of spoonfuls of her famous baked macaroni and cheese out of an iron pan.  _

_ Adora sniffed the air, “It smells great! What are you making?” _

_ “Mac n’ cheese dearie!” Razz grinned, “It’s your favorite isn’t it?” _

_ The blonde rubbed her neck awkwardly as she grumbled to herself, “It’s actually my sister’s favorite…”  _

_ The old woman shook her head, “Ah! Forgive me dearie! I seem to have forgotten again!”  _

_ “That’s alright Razz,” Adora chuckled.  _

_ Razz adjusted the big glasses on her face and handed a bowl and spoon over to Adora, who was waiting patiently on the table, “Here you go dearie, your favorite!” _

_ She awkwardly laughed and smiled thankfully at her guardian and started to munch happily on the mac n’ cheese. Though it was not her favorite dish, Adora would be lying if she said that she didn’t find the food absolutely delectable. Razz watched happily as Adora quickly scooped the noodles in her mouth, nothing made the woman happier than seeing someone enjoy her cooking so much.  _

_ “Ah, I remember now, Mara was the one who loved my mac n’ cheese!” Razz clapped her hands happily. Adora stopped the fork in front of her mouth when she heard mention of her sister again, “I would always bring a container of this to her whenever I noticed how tired she looked from working at the diner. I miss her greatly,” the woman nudged Adora’s shoulder, “don’t you dearie?” _

_ Adora cringed and placed her fork back in her bowl, “S-sorry Razz, but can we not mention my sister… please?” _

_ The woman smiled sadly, “Ah yes, so sorry dearie, I forgot about-” _

_ “It’s alright Razz,” Adora said, interrupting the woman, “It’s alright,” she whispered. _

  
  
  


Adora walked around Brightmoon University’s campus with Bow and Glimmer. She stretched her arms and listened closely to the couple explaining which building is which. Adora sighed, for some reason, she couldn’t get that Catra girl’s eyes out of her mind. For some reason, she was just so entranced.

“...over there is the STEM building, that’s where one of our friend’s buildings! Bow exclaimed, pointing at a large gray building.

The blonde frowned at the building, “It looks so… depressing compared to all of the other buildings in Brightmoon,” she turned her neck and saw the other colorful blue and purple buildings behind them.

Glimmer shrugged, “Well, STEM students  _ are  _ probably the most depressed students in Brightmoon,” she joked.

“Not Entrapta though!” Bow exclaimed, “She’s a genius! I should introduce you to her, I think you two would get along well.”

Adora nodded and yawned, “Maybe another day, I think I’m going to head back to the dorms now, I’m pooped after this tour,” she smiled at the couple, “Thanks for showing me around guys, you didn’t really have to though.”

Bow smiled, “Don’t worry about it! We had a blast showing you around, it’s not everyday we get a new student!”

“Thanks guys,” Adora smiled.

Glimmer grinned back, “If you ever need help or just someone to talk to, you can always find me and Bow,” the girl rubbed her neck awkwardly, “Well… you are roommates with me afterall, kudos to my mom.”

The boy went to Adora’s side and wrapped a welcoming arm around her, “Well, since we’re probably going to see each other often, we should have a cool group name.”

“Group name?” Adora questioned.

Bow snapped his fingers, “Exactly,” he rubbed his chin as he thought, Glimmer and Adora just exchanged a confused look, “How about… the Best Friend Squad!”

The two girls exchanged another perplexed group and both shook their heads, “Yeah… let’s not do that,” Adora said slowly.

“I prefer the Glimmer Group!” The shorter girl said excitedly.

The boy blinked at both of them and shook his head, “Nah,” he wrapped both of his arms around the girls and grinned, “We’re the Best Friend Squad!”

  
  
  


_ Tunes hummed in Adora’s ear while she quietly sang along to the music, while tightly packing clothes into two duffle bags. Finally, two years of community college was over, she was finally going to go to a university! There was a knock on her door and the girl turned around to see Razz holding a freshly baked pie for her. _

_ “Adora dearie, do you want to eat with me before your Uber comes?” Razz invited. _

_ The girl took out one of her airpods and gave her a thumbs up, “Yeah I’ll be right there!” The woman nodded and walked away from Adora’s room. After she finished zipping up her bags, Adora grabbed both of them, along with a backpack with other personal items, and casually jogged out of her room, into the kitchen. _

_ The blonde pulled out a chair after setting her belongings down, and sat next to Razz, “It smells great!” Adora exclaimed, her mouth watering when she saw Razz cutting a generous slice of berry pie for her.  _

_ Razz pushed the plate towards her and smiled, “Look at you, going off to the big city and leaving poor Madame Razz all alone,” Adora stuffed her face with the pie and smiled awkwardly, “I’m going to miss you greatly dearie.” _

_ “I’m going to miss you too Razz,” Adora said softly, she leaned forward and embraced the woman tightly, “I’ll promise to visit you whenever I have breaks.” _

_ The woman smiled into the hug and kissed the girl on her cheek, “Your Uber should be coming soon to take you to the train station, no?”  _

_ Adora looked down at her watch on her left wrist and nodded, “Yeah, in about 30 minutes or so, I have plenty of time to hang out with you Razz,” she grinned. After finishing her pie, Adora pushed her plate away and leaned back in her chair. _

_ Seeing the now empty plate, Razz grabbed Adora’s plate and proceeded to cut her another large slice of pie. Adora sat up and shook her hands rapidly, “No, no, I don’t need another slice Razz, I’m on a diet, remember?” _

_ Ignoring the girl, Razz placed another slice of berry pie on Adora’s plate and handed it to her. “You younglings with your dieting nonsense! I don’t know if that university food will be feeding you well, so I best stuff you up before you leave! Plus who knows when the next time you will be eating Madame Razz’s pie!” _

_ “But Razz-” _

_ “Eat up dearie!” Razz insisted, placing the plate in Adora’s hands. The girl grimaced at it and Razz cheerfully clapped her hands, “You finish up that plate okay dearie? I will be right back, there’s a surprise I need to give to you before you depart,” the woman quickly stood up and walked towards her room. _

_ Adora poked the pie with her fork as she waited for Razz to come out with the surprise she needed to give her. Feeling the calories go to her stomach, for the next 10 minutes, she forced herself to take small bites of the pie, as she heard her guardian grumbling in the background.  _

_ “Oh where did I put it?” Adora heard Razz ramble in her room, “Aiyah, I’m so forgetful!” _

_ The girl spent the next 10 minutes scrolling through her social media, when she heard the rummaging in Razz’s room stop. She looked at her watch, “The Uber should be coming here soon,” She slowly stood up and grabbed her bags on the floor, “Razz! I’m going to wait for my ride outside okay?” _

_ The old woman came skiddling out of her room holding a DVD, “I found it!” Adora gave her a thumbs up and started to walk towards the front door, the heavy bags slightly weighing Adora’s body down.  _

_ “What is that anyways?” Adora asked. _

_ Razz handed it towards her, “Your sister gave me this before she left, she told me to give it to you. Though I have no idea what’s in it myself, I never brought myself to watch it…” _

_ Adora dropped her bags on the floor and froze, “Mara gave that to you?” She slowly turned around and faced Razz. _

_ “Do you want it?”  _

_ “Absolutely not,” Adora huffed. _

_ The old woman raised an eyebrow, “Don’t you want to see what your sister said to you before she left?” _

_ Tears poked out of the blonde’s eyes, “I don’t want to have anything to do with her! She left me! She left us!” Adora shakily yelled, “She didn’t even tell us where she went! Mara just dropped me off on your porch years ago and just left to who knows where!” _

_ Razz reached a hand towards her, “Adora-” _

_ “She’s supposed to be family!” the blonde snapped, “But family doesn't leave family behind!” Adora bit her lip and she spotted her ride pull up on the sidewalk, “Keep it,” she muttered, “I don’t want anything to do with Mara.”  _

_ Two headlights shined in the darkness and a car pulled up besides the sidewalk, “That’s my ride…” With a grunt, Adora leaned down and picked up her duffle bags, she turned around and kissed her guardian goodbye on the cheek, “I’ll see you soon Razz, I promise I’ll come and visit,” she said softly. The girl turned around and walked towards the car, leaving a shocked Razz behind. _

_ “Wait Adora dearie!” Razz shouted. The woman tried her hardest to run after the departing car, but her shaky knees couldn’t keep up and she fell onto a soft bed of grass in the front yard. The woman looked up, tears welling up in her eyes,  _

_ “Adora!” _

  
  
  


“Adora!” 

The blonde gasped and sat up from her bed, her head pounding violently, “W-what?” she said in a shaky voice. She turned her head and saw Glimmer standing over her as she worryingly looked at her, “What’s wrong? Did something happen?” Adora asked.

Glimmer placed a hand on Adora’s shoulder, “You’re crying…” she said in a hushed voice.

Hesitantly, the girl brought her up to the corners of her eyes, where she felt warm tears stream out of her burning eyes. Adora quickly wiped the tears away with her sleeve and covered her face with her hand.

“You good?”

She nodded, “I felt like I just woke up to the longest dream ever…” she mumbled.

The cotton candy haired girl sat on the edge of Adora’s bed, “You know I’m here for you right? Do you want to talk about it?”

She shook her head, “I’m good… it was just a dream,” she breathed out of her nose,  _ Too bad that dream actually happened before,  _ Adora thought to herself. The blonde scratched her bed head and looked at the alarm clock besides her bed. It was 10:44 pm.

The girl got out of bed and put on a warm coat, Glimmer raised an eyebrow at her, “Where are you going?”

“I need some fresh air,” Adora said, zipping up her red varsity jacket, “The dorm is a bit stuffy… no offense.”

“None taken,” Glimmer laughed, “Um, want me to go with you? It’s like pitch black outside.”

Adora smiled at the offer, “Thanks, but I’ll stay under the lights, don't worry. Plus, I think I just need a bit of alone time right now, I’ll be back in an hour or so, you have my number right?”

Glimmer nodded, “Uh, yeah,” she watched as her roommate put on her shoes and started to head out of the door, “Stay safe okay? Especially cause it’s dark out! Who knows what kind of weirdos are lurking out there, even on campus!” She warned.

“Will do!” Adora yelled behind her as she shut the door.

  
  
  


The bitter autumn air nipped at Adora’s rosy cheeks, she shivered and dug her hands in her fuzzy pockets. She looked around the campus and noticed that some of the buildings are already dark, but noticed that the STEM building had all of their lights on. She looked ahead of her and noticed that the cafeteria was still open, “Not really hungry… plus Razz’s food is on another level,” there was a guilty tug on her heartstrings and she sighed to herself, “I miss her…”

Adora passed the cafeteria and walked under the street lamps towards the library, “It should be fairly quiet and warm in there…” she muttered to herself, “Fuck it’s cold,” she hissed. Quickly, she jogged over to the library and walked inside, embracing the warmthness of the heater. 

She looked around the library, there were only a handful of students still staying up and studying. Adora walked towards the back of the library and browsed the Fantasy / Fiction section of the building. She was always into magic, swords, and fighting, maybe with a sprinkle of romance too. The girl picked up a random book that had a colorful cover on it and sat on the table towards the back of the room.

After a couple of minutes of reading about a dragon trainer falling in love with a dragon hunter, you know, typical fantasy enemies to lovers type of stuff, the girl got up from her desk and strolled around the library, trying to find a bathroom. She hummed to herself and passed a stairwell that led up to the roof of the library. Her ears twitched as she heard a beautiful, mysterious melody coming from the top of the stairwell.

Curiosity got the best of Adora and she stared at the stairs leading up to the rooftops, “Looks like my little bathroom break is going to have to wait…” she whispered to herself. Adora turned her head cautiously and crept slowly up the stairwell, the melody growing louder with each step. She pressed her ear on the door and heard someone singing lovely. Like a siren’s song.

Adora carefully opened the door and saw a girl bathing in the moonlight as she sat near the railing, her body half facing the entrance. The girl had brunette hair and had her eyes closed. She plucked the strings of an acoustic guitar, as she sang lyrics Adora’s never heard before. 

_ I’d rather be  _

_ Free-ee-ee _

_ Free-ee-ee _

_ Free…  _

_ Free-ee-ee _

_ Free-ee-ee _

_ Free… _

_ From here _

Stuck in a mystifying trance, Adora kept staring at the girl, the rooftop’s door slipping from her grip. The brunette opened her eyes when the song ended and revealed her golden brown and piercing blue eye. 

Adora’s mouth gaped open,  _ Wait, _ she thought,  _ Catra?! _

Her grip of the door’s handle slipped out of Adora’s fingers and slammed the door shut. Adora and Catra both jumped when the loud sound echoed in the night. Catra quickly turned around, her mismatched eyes looking right into Adora’s gray-blue eyes. A nervous sweat dripped down the side of Adora’s face.

_ I’m fucked. _

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> adora is like "heh... i'm in danger" anyways looks like in the next chapter we're going to get them to interact a bit more so yay!!!! yeah in this story mara is adora's sister and razz is like adora's sweet little guardian. yes adora did go to community college for two years, so in this story everyone is like in their junior year of college yee haw! we're going to find out a bit more about mara is the future chapters so just bear with me tho i am curious about yall's theories if you have any haha. the first day back to school was pretty shitty for me, it wasn't difficult or anything it's just like ion really vibe with school lol i'm not used to it after having two weeks of break, but yeah :/ anyways so that was today's chapter i hope you guys find it interesting so far and please feel free to leave any comments down below constructive criticism is always welcome here!!!! again hope you guys liked this chapter and this story so far and hope you guys have a good morning/afternoon/evening! :)


	3. stained ink

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a glimpse of catra's past / adora talks to catra for the first time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys! just wanted to say that there is a trigger warning for child abuse in this chapter!!!

**TW: !!! Child Abuse !!!**

_ Carefully, Catra tiptoed over to Ms. Weaver’s desk and snatched a black sharpie pen. The little girl giggled to herself and ran out to the yard where the other orphans were playing. She scanned the yard and spotted a little girl with dark skin who wore dreads, a scrawny boy with wispy blonde hair, and a tall boy who had an amused, blank face and a buzzcut.  _

_ “Lonnie, Kyle, Rogelio!” Catra waved to them and ran towards her friends, “Look I got this from Ms. Weaver’s desk!” The brunette girl eagerly showed her three friends the sharpie that she took. _

_ Kyle whimpered, “Y-you stole that from Ms. Weaver? If you get caught you’ll get in trouble Catra!” _

_ The brunette lurched at the cowardly boy, “I didn’t steal it! I just borrowed it!” _

_ Lonnie snatched the sharpie out of Catra’s hands and twirled it around her fingers, “Well what are we even going to do with your ‘borrowed’ sharpie? We have nothing to draw on!”  _

_ “Give that back!” Catra growled, grabbing the sharpie back in her hands. She chuckled to herself, “Well, we can always draw on ourselves and get cool tattoos, like the ones we saw in that movie!”  _

_ Lonnie glanced at Rogelio who stayed silent and just shrugged, the girl sighed, “Well… I guess that’s better than playing on dirt. Can you even draw though?” _

_ Catra uncapped the marker and started to draw patterns on her forearm, “It can’t be too hard can it?” The three other kids watched in amazement as they saw how smoothly the marker sketched on Catra’s arm. After a minute, Catra grinned and proudly showed her friends her “tattoo.” She smiled confidently, “Check it out!”  _

_ The trio stared at the drawing. Lonnie looked back up at Catra, “It’s a cat,” she said dully. _

_ “Yep!” Catra exclaimed, “It’s the cat that always visits the orphanage, the one that poops on the front yard all the time!” _

_ Kyle laughed, “The cat that Ms. Weaver always has to chase out?”  _

_ “Exactly!” Catra clapped, “I named it Applesauce.” _

_ Lonnie blinked, “The cat tattoo or the actual cat?” _

_ “Both!” _

_ Lonnie pursed her lips together, “That’s… nice,” she coughed, “Anyways, if Ms. Weaver sees that you’ve drawn on yourself, you’re really going to get in trouble.” _

_ Catra scoffed, “That old hag isn’t going to find out anything!” she smiled at her friends who were looking at her in fear, “Plus, even if she does, I don’t care! She doesn’t own me! I’m my own person,” she saw how Kyle whimpered behind Rogelio, “What are you guys looking at?”  _

_ The young girl turned around and saw Ms. Weaver standing behind her.  _

_ The brunette gulped, “G-good afternoon… uhm- Ms. Weaver.” _

_ Violently the woman grabbed Catra’s arm, “What is the meaning of this?! Insolent child! Are you drawing tattoos on yourself?! Do you want to be part of a gang when you grow up?!”  _

_ “N-no! It was just for fun!” Catra cried out. _

_ Ms. Weaver ignored her and started to drag the young girl inside the orphanage. Catra looked in horror at her friends and dropped the sharpie that was clutched in her right hand, onto the grass. She nodded at her friends, signalling them to keep it. Catra assumed that they understood what they meant since Rogelio picked it up and gave the marker to Lonnie.  _

_ Catra was being dragged all across the orphanage, she thought she felt her arm pop out of its socket by how forceful Ms. Weaver was grasping it. They went into the bathroom and Ms. Weaver kicked out a step stool for Catra to stand on and got out an old rag. Catra stood on the stool and Ms. Weaver grabbed the girl by her arm again and started to scrub the ink off of Catra’s forearm under the scalding running water. _

_ “Y-you’re hurting me!” Catra winced in pain. _

_ “Good, so then you’ll learn not to do this again!” Ms. Weaver grumbled, scrubbing the old rag harder. Catra looked down at her arm, the ink was barely coming off, but she could feel her skin starting to scrape off. A tear ran down Catra’s cheek and she sniffled. Ms. Weaver stared at her, “Don’t you dare cry, you should have known this was what was coming for you.”  _

_ Those words only made Catra sob harder.  _

  
  
  


_ Catra rubbed her red forearm and walked into her bedroom where Lonnie was sitting on her bed. The brunette rubbed her nose and face planted on her pillow, trying to hide her tear stained face from her roommate. There’s no way the other orphans are going to find out that Catra cried, she had a reputation to maintain around here.  _

_ “Are you okay Catra?” Lonnie asked. _

_ The girl gave her a silent thumbs up, “I’m fine,” she murmured in her blanket. Catra let out a deep breath and she sat up, looking dead in Lonnie’s eyes, “Do you still have the sharpie?”  _

_ “Uh… yeah,” she dug her hands in her pocket and threw the sharpie at Catra, who caught it effortlessly, “What are you going to do with it?” Catra silently uncapped it and started to draw on herself again. Lonnie walked towards her and grabbed the burnette’s wrist, “Are you crazy?! You’ll just get punished again!” _

_ Catra pulled her wrist out of Lonnie’s grasp and continued to draw on herself, “Don’t care. Ms. Weaver can’t tell me what to do, even if she can, there’s no way I’m listening to her.” She stuck her tongue out in concentration and started to draw a bunch of flowers and clouds on her hand. _

  
  
  


_ It’s been days since the first sharpie incident and ever since that day, Catra has been drawing on her arm like a madwoman. Every free chance she got, she would take out her drawing instrument and scribble on her arm. It wasn’t even just because she liked drawing, though that was one of the main points, but it was because she wanted to piss Ms. Weaver off.  _

_ Though, every time she got caught, she had to go through hell with Ms. Weaver literally scrubbing her skin off. But hey, if it meant pissing that old hag off, it was all worth it to the little girl.  _

_ Ms. Weaver had Catra by her arm and was once again dragging her to the bathroom, “It seems like you can’t ever learn a lesson can you Catra?” Ms. Weaver threw Catra in the bathroom and started to fill up the sink with water. The girl raised her eyebrow, that’s not usually how Ms. Weaver would clean off the ink… _

_ The woman pulled out the step stool and Catra hesitantly stepped on it. Ms. Weaver grabbed Catra by the back of her hair and dunked her into the sink filled with icy cold water. Catra tried resisting Ms. Weaver, heck, she even was punching the woman to get off of her. But Ms. Weaver was too strong compared to a puny 10 year old.  _

_ After being literally drowned for 10 seconds, Ms. Weaver pulled Catra back up to the surface. Catra gasped for air and coughed out some of the water that was lodged in her throat. _

_ “See what I have to do Catra? Because you can’t seem to learn your lesson I have to be extreme about it!” The little girl could practically hear Ms. Weaver’s smiles in her words, “It’s for your own good my child.” Right when Catra was in mid sob, she felt the woman dunk her head in the water again. _

_ Catra’s eyes were open underwater, but she squeezed them shut, praying that this whole nightmare would be over already. _

  
  
  


_ With a gasp, Catra opened her eyes and violently sat up from her bed. What time was it? She looked at the alarm clock next to her bed and it was already 10 am. She scratched her head and got out of bed. Everyone should already be up for recess. Just then, Lonnie barged in the room. _

_ “About time you’ve woken up! Come on get out of there!” Lonnie ordered. _

_ The other girl rubbed her eyes, “Why? What’s happening? _

_ Lonnie walked towards Catra and tugged on her arm, “The mayor of Crimson Town is here and he’s looking to adopt! Don’t you want to get adopted and finally get out of here?” _

_ Catra scoffed, but got out of bed, “Like anyone would pick me as their daughter, but alright, I’ll see what the fuss is all about.” Lonnie smiled and the two girls went out into the yard, Catra saw a tall man with slick blue hair, wearing a suit standing next to Ms. Weaver talking.  _

_ She and Lonnie walked past them and Catra overheard Ms. Weaver talking to the strange man, “As you can see the children are very well behaved.”  _

_ “Come on let’s go and play,” Lonnie nudged Catra, “we have to be on our best behaviors so we have a higher chance of getting adopted!” Catra rolled her eyes and ignored Lonnie, instead of playing catch with all of the other children, she walked over to the giant oak tree and sat under the shade. _

_ Kyle noticed how Catra was sitting alone, being the sweet little boy he was, Kyle grabbed the ball and gently threw it to Catra. Instead of catching the ball, Catra just slammed it down to the ground and glared at Kyle, who got the idea and just left her alone. _

_ On the other side of the yard, Catra could clearly hear Ms. Weaver talk to the man, “Don’t mind Catra, unlike the other kids she’s… a handful. Though, I am trying my best to straighten out her behavior.” _

_ The man ignored Ms. Weaver and walked across the field towards Catra. He kneeled down and faced Catra, holding a hand out to her, “Hello, my name is Mr. Hordak, you’re Catra right?” Behind the man, Catra could see Ms. Weaver jogging up to them.  _

_ Hestitanly, Catra shook Mr. Hordak’s hand, “Y-yeah… I’m Catra.” _

_ Mr. Hordak looked back at Ms. Weaver, who was already beside him, “I think I’ll take this young girl with me.” _

_ Catra’s eyes grew as big as Ms. Weaver’s, “S-sir?” The woman stuttered, “I think you would like to reconsider! Catra is a horrid child, she does not have any manners, nor would she listen to you! Please for your own sake,” she gestured to the other children behind them, “choose another child, I’m absolutely positive that they would do you better than what Catra has to offer!” _

_ Mr. Hordak slowly stood up and faced the woman, he sighed, “No, today I’m going to be taking her home. Come Ms. Weaver, we have much paperwork to fill out,” he looked at Catra and smiled ominously. Catra bit her lips, and cringed when she felt goosebumps creep up her neck. _

  
  
  


“Catra!”

Her eyes opened and was blinded by the ceiling lights. Breathing heavily, Catra looked up and saw her music teacher, Professor Spinnerella, Professor Netossa’s wife, standing over her. After calming herself down, Catra looked around and looked at her watch, she was in the music hall, 30 minutes after the lecture had ended. The brunette looked at her professor, “Y-yeah?”

The woman frowned and sat on the table next to where Catra was at, “You fell asleep during lecture again,” Catra smiled sheepishly and muttered an apology under her breath, “This is the third time you’ve fell asleep during class, you used to pay attention, what happened?”

The girl sighed into her hands, “I don’t know, I haven’t been getting much sleep I guess.”

Professor Spinerella smiled kindly, “Too much work from other teachers?”

“Yeah something like that,” Catra lied through her teeth. To be honest she was just scared to fall asleep since she never knew which nightmare would plague her mind for that night. But sometimes, she would just black out without her knowing and be forced to live through an awful nightmare. Like what just happened. 

“Netossa has been telling me about your artwork,” her professor said, Catra cringed when she heard another mention of her…  _ unique _ art, “You know, if you’re ever having trouble with anything, Netossa and I are here to help you, we’re very good listeners if you let us. We can even recommend you some therapist if you need it.”

Catra frowned, she never liked the ideas of therapists. Telling a complete stranger about your problems and why you’re fucked up? No thank you. The brunette put on the fakest smile she could and looked at the woman, “I’m good, thanks for the offer though,” she stood up from the desk, “I think I’m going to… head out now, if you’ll excuse me,” she said quietly.

As Catra walked out of the doors, she heard Professor Spinnerella yell behind her, “The offer is always available just tell me or Netossa!” 

She turned around and gave her professor a thumbs up and walked out the door. 

  
  
  


Rock music blasted in Catra’s airpods as she was planning her project assigned by Professor Netossa. She looked at the time, it was 10 pm. She took out her airpods and leaned back in her chair, Catra thought about her professor’s offer, she scoffed, “I don’t need a therapist,” she eyed her acoustic guitar case in the corner of her dorm. 

She stood up and started to put on layers, Catra wasn’t the biggest fan of the cold. The girl swung the guitar case over her shoulder and headed out the door.

Catra walked towards the library and snuck around the bookshelves so no one could spot her. She went to the back of the building and went up the stairwell that led to the rooftops. Catra pushed on the door but it wouldn’t budge, “This is why I always carry a hairpin,” she muttered to herself. 

The girl fished out a hairpin from her pocket and proceeded to pick the lock. She opened the door and pulled her collar up to cover her face partially from the biting autumn wind. Catra walked towards the ledge of the roof and took out her acoustic guitar, sitting down on the cold roof.

Humming to herself, Catra took her time to tune her strings. “Should I play that song...?” she whispered, “Fuck it, it’s not like anyone would hear how embarrassing it is.” She plucked the strings of her guitar, took a deep breath, closed her eyes and started to sing quietly to herself.

_ I guess I have to face _

_ That in this awful place _

_ I shouldn’t show a trace of doubt _

_ But pulled against the grain _

_ I feel a little pain _

_ That I would rather do without _

_ I’d rather be… _

_ Free-ee-ee _

_ Free-ee-ee _

_ Free… _

_ I’d rather be  _

_ Free-ee-ee _

_ Free-ee-ee _

_ Free… _

_ Free-ee-ee _

_ Free-ee-ee _

_ Free.. _

_ From here _

  
Catra smiled at herself and opened her eyes, she was satisfied by how well she played her song this time around. Suddenly, she heard a loud noise behind her and jumped. Quickly, she turned around and saw that blonde girl again staring right at her. Catra stood up and glared at the girl. 

“What the actual fuck?!” Catra yelled, she saw the girl flinch at the tone of her voice. She furrowed her eyebrows,  _ What was this chick's name again?  _ Catra thought. “What are you doing here princess?” She mentally slapped herself,  _ Okay so ‘princess’ is definitely not her name, but play it cool.  _

The blonde stepped forward and nervously rubbed her neck, “Uh- I was just looking for the bathroom and I heard really pretty singing so I just wanted to check it out!” 

Catra’s face turned red with a mix of anger and embarrassment. She sped walked up to 

the girl and glared at her, “How much did you hear?!” The brunette’s mind was racing, did someone seriously just hear the embarrassing song that she composed herself. Catra was honestly ready to jump off the roof. 

“Uh… not much, just the ending part,” Catra let out a breath, at least she didn’t hear the whole song. She smiled at Catra, “You have a really pretty voice! Are you a music major?”

“No shit,” Catra said sarcastically, she walked back to where her guitar was and started to pack it up in her case. She turned around and saw the girl still standing there, watching her curiously, “Oh you’re still here, don’t you have somewhere to be princess?”

The girl stepped forward, “My name’s actually Adora,” she smiled, “You’re Catra right?”

“Sadly,” she muttered. Adora walked up to Catra, “Uh… can you please move, you’re blocking the door.”

Adora bit her lip, “Look I like you!”

Catra stared at her in surprise and opened her mouth, “Wha-”

“Oh fuck I didn’t mean it like that!” Adora said anxiously, “I mean like… you’re a cool person and I want to be friends with you!” The brunette blinked and started to burst into laughter leaving Adora speechless, “Uh… what’s so funny?”

After a couple of seconds, Catra stopped laughing and the rooftop was filled with an uncomfortable silence, besides the sound of the wind howling. Catra walked over to the railing and sat down, allowing her legs to dangle off the edge, “You don’t want to be my friend trust me.”

The other girl hesitantly walked over to Catra and sat down besides her, “Why is that? I think you’re cool and I want to be your friend!”

“You’re wrong,” Catra mumbled, “I’m a terrible person, you must have heard about that already, considering that you were with Glimmer and Bow.”

Adora shrugged, “I don’t care what they think about you!”

“Well they’re right about me okay? I am a horrible person who did horrible things,” Catra groaned into her hands, “Plus, you can’t determine if I’m a cool person or if you like me. Knowing if you like me or if you think I’m a cool person takes time and work. At least you have to know me,” she turned around to Adora, “And you  _ literally _ don’t know anything about me.”

The blonde nodded, “I know that but… I was hoping to get to know you.”

Catra sighed, “There’s nothing I can do to stop you can I?” She looked over at Adora who shook her head. The girl laughed wryly, “Alright sure, you can get to know me blondie, but don’t go crying when you find out that your friends and I were right and that I’m a terrible person.”

Adora’s face lit up, “I’ll prove you wrong!” 

“Whatever princess.”

“My name’s Adora!”

“Okay blondie.”

Adora's face grew red with frustration and Catra just laughed at how dumb she looked. “Uh… can I get your number if that’s okay?” Adora asked, holding her phone out. Catra shrugged, took the phone, and silently added her contact information in. Adora grinned, “Cool.”

The phone buzzed in Adora’s hand and she looked at the message. It was from Glimmer. 

Glimmer: Hey you coming back anytime soon?

She got up from the floor and placed her phone back in her pocket, “I should be getting back to my dorm now, my roommate is getting worried,” she laughed awkwardly, “I’ll text you later!”

“Please don’t.”

“Too bad! That’s why you gave me your phone number didn’t you? So we can talk more?” Adora pouted.

“Nah, I just gave it to you because I knew that you wouldn’t shut up about it if I refused to,” the shorter girl said smoothly.

Adora rolled her eyes playfully, “Whatever!” she smiled at Catra, “I’ll see you later?” Catra looked at her and gave her a silent thumbs up. Adora grinned and started to walk backwards to the door, keeping her eyes locked on Catra. Luck was not on her side and the girl tripped over her heel and fell on her floor. Catra laughed at how much of an idiot Adora was. Too embarrassed to say anything after, Adora quickly got up, closed the door and left Catra on the rooftops. 

Catra swung her legs back and forth in the air and gazed up at the moon and stars. She rested her chin on her hand and closed her eyes, trying to get a peaceful moment, but was immediately interrupted by her phone buzzing in her pocket.

Grumbling with annoyance, Catra took out her phone and saw a text from an Unknown Number.

Unknown Number: Good night!

A second later, she got another text.

Unknown Number: This is Adora by the way.

Amused, Catra quickly texted back and before shoving her phone back in her pocket, she named the contact “dumb blonde chick,” and put her phone on Do Not Disturb, so she could  _ actually _ get a moment of peace. 

Catra: idiot.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> phew so this was one hell of a chapter we got to see catra's past in the orphanage and weaver was being a fucking bitch, she had a friendship with lonnie, kyle and rogelio, and we found out that hordak adopted her, wonder how that's going to turn out lol. but look at spinerella and netossa being the best moms that they are and are trying to help catra out, offering to listen / therapy like they're so sweet i love them and they deserved more screen time!!! okay but adora is SUCH a dumb lesbian like omfg she's such a wreck okay just to clarify she as like a small ish crush on catra but mostly just wants to be friends with the grumpy lesbian. but HEY at least they exchanged numbers and will be maybe talking more???? hopefully haha! anyways hope you guys liked today's chapter and yeah hope you all have a good morning/afternoon/evening!


	4. so far away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> glimmer doesn't approve of adora talking to catra

Was it just her imagination, or was Catra now seeing blonde hair wherever she went now? Ever since that night where she exchanged her contact information with Adora, wherever she would go on campus, she would always see a strand of golden hair and would instantly figure out that it was Adora’s. 

“Hey Catra!” a familiar voice yelled in the direction of the cafeteria. 

The girl groaned and put down her sketchbook, she looked up and saw Adora prancing happily towards her for like the fourth time today. Catra took a deep breath to calm herself down so she doesn’t blow up with annoyance, “Hey blondie,” Catra said through clenched teeth, “What are you doing here again, I just saw you five minutes ago when you walked into the cafeteria with your friends.”

Adora sat down next to Catra on the bench, “I know but I was with Glimmer and Bow so I didn’t really get to talk to you, so I lied that I had to go to the bathroom just so I can just see how you were doing.”

“Please just go back to your friends and leave me alone,” Catra muttered under her breath.

The girl blinked obliviously, “What was that?”

“Nothing,” Catra replied.

The cheery girl leaned forward to look at Catra’s grouchy face and pointed at her sketchbook, “It’s so cool that you’re an art major  _ and _ a music major! You must be really talented,” Adora grinned, “I’m just a simple sports medicine major.”

“That’s nice,” the brunette replied bluntly.

Adora smiled and looked up at the sky, “You know I envy you, I wish I was as creative as you, I can’t draw or sing for my life,” she laughed awkwardly.

Catra glanced at Adora, “I mean, there’s people who just have natural creative talent,” Adora looked at the girl who was just staring at her, “But, no matter how bad your art is, just keep practicing it and you can just grow your creativity in that way. There’s no such thing as having no creativity since everyone has their own unique form of it.”

“Huh, I guess you’re right,” Adora nodded, “How come you always know what to say?”

The shorter girl shrugged, “Dunno, it just comes to me.”

The two college students sat in an awkward silence after that, Adora just watching other college students walk into the cafeteria, while Catra just listening to the birds chirp in the trees. The blonde spotted the cafeteria door open and saw her friend Glimmer walk out of it, looking for her. Adora stood up abruptly and smiled at Catra, “Looks like my friend is looking for me, I’ll see you later?”

Catra gave her a silent thumbs up in response, as usual, and Adora smiled again, “Maybe you can show me some of your art one day!”

“Yeah, not going to happen princess.”

Adora awkwardly laughed and jogged over to Glimmer who was clearly glaring at Catra. Glimmer frowned at her friend, “...Come on let’s go eat already.”

The blonde raised an eyebrow, was it just her or was Glimmer mad at her?

  
  
  


Humming the enchanting song she heard Catra singing that night, Adora brought her lunch tray and sat on the table where she saw Glimmer, Bow and her other friends sitting at. Adora took out her plastic spork and started to dig into the BMU’s cafeteria food. She tried to ignore the strange looks she saw Glimmer gave her as she ate.

One of Adora’s friends, Perfuma, leaned across the table, towards her, “What were you humming just now Adora? I don’t think I’ve ever heard that tune before, but it is quite beautiful!” 

Adora eyed Glimmer who was now avoiding eye contact with her. _What’s up with her?_ Adora thought. Next to Perfuma, she saw Scorpia who was talking with a purple hair girl named Entrapta. Even though Adora wasn’t close with Scorpia or Entrapta, she knew out that they both had a rough history with Catra. 

“Oh uh, it’s just a random song,” Adora laughed.

Perfuma nodded and grasped Scorpia’s arm, “Hey Scorpia, you used to minor in music last year right? You must be  _ so _ talented!”

Scorpia looked over at Perfuma and blushed, “W-well I wouldn’t say that I’m talented at it,” she stuttered, “It’s just a hobby,” she chuckled nervously and looked at where Perfuma was touching her biceps. 

Everyone in the friend group knew that Perfuma and Scorpia had a thing for each other, but for some reason neither of them could admit that the other person liked them back. 

“Ugh,” a blue haired girl with dark skin groaned, “get a room you two, you’re making me lose my appetite. How can I concentrate on my lunch while you two are acting like a married couple in front of me?”

The two other girls turned a crimson red and Perfuma instantly took her hand off of Scorpia’s arm. “Mermista we are  _ just _ friends okay! Don’t say stuff like that!” Perfuma said, scolding her friend. Mermista shrugged it off and rolled her eyes, “Plus, you and Seahawk are always being lovey dovey too!”

Mermista frowned, “That’s where you’re wrong, I do  _ not _ act lovey dovey with Seahawk!”

An arm wrapped over the girl’s shoulder right when Mermista said that, “My dear Mermista, that is a lie, have you forgotten about last ni-”

“Shut up right now!” Mermista said, furiously blushing as she slapped her hand over her chatty boyfriend’s mouth. The girl looked over at Perfuma who was dying with laughter, “I’m going to kill you!”

Adora playfully rolled her eyes at her friends and took another bite of her food. The girl felt goosebumps go down her neck as she sensed the familiar feeling of someone having their eyes on her. She glanced up and saw Glimmer glaring right at her. Adora dropped her plastic spork, “What?”

Glimmer looked away and shrugged, “Nothing.”

The blonde bit her lip and hit her hand on the table violently, making everyone in the friend group look at her curiously, “No don’t give me that Glimmer, you’ve been eyeing me this entire time! Spit it out what’s wrong?”

“You want to know what’s wrong?” Glimmer scoffed, she looked back at Adora, “Why the fuck were you hanging out with Catra?! Don’t act like I didn’t see you with her a few minutes ago! Going to the bathroom my ass!”

Adora frowned, “Why do you care! I can be friends with whoever I want!” she looked around the table and saw Entrapta and Scorpia look away, while everyone else had stopped what they were doing just to listen to what was happening.

Bow placed his hand on his girlfriend, “Glimm, let’s not cause a scene.”

Glimmer pushed his hand away and glared again at Adora, “I thought I told you not to mess around with her and that she’s a bad person. Scratch that she’s a  _ terrible _ person! Don’t you know what she did to Scorpia and Entrapta?” Glimmer motioned her hands towards the two girls, who  _ clearly _ did not want to be part of this conversation. 

“You don’t have the right to decide who or who shouldn’t be my friend!” Adora debated.

The sunset hair girl rolled her eyes, “Fine whatever, go to your new friend then, and don’t come crying back to us when she shows her true colors.”

“Maybe I will!” Adora yelled, she stood up and stormed out of the cafeteria, forcing herself not to let her tears fly out of her eyes.

  
  
  


Catra watched Adora walk away from her and towards Glimmer. The brunette saw the way how Glimmer glared at her, but couldn’t find a single fuck to give. After she saw Adora and Glimmer disappear into the cafeteria, the girl got up from the bench and started to head out of campus towards the local ice cream shop to get her favorite sorbet.

What? The girl had a sweet tooth okay?

After a fairly short 5 minute walk, she yawned and opened the door to the ice cream parlor, The Kingdom of Snows. To be honest, Catra thought it was a pretty cringey name for an ice cream place, but whatever they had pretty good sorbet flavors. Catra walked up to the register where a very bored looking Korean, pre-teen girl, with short jet black hair was working at. 

“Working again Elsa? Don’t you have school to go to?” Catra said, leaning her body against the counter.

The little girl rolled her eyes, “Wouldn’t you like to know Catra, and it’s  _ Frosta _ get it right, it’s been a year since we’ve met.” Even though Catra was a pretty cold person, she had a pretty soft spot for Frosta, but there was no fucking way she would ever admit that. 

Ignoring her, Catra walked over to the glass display and peered at the flavors, “Ooh… lemon sorbet, I’ll get that Miss Ice Princess,” the brunette looked up and smirked cockily at the girl.

Frosta sighed, “You  _ always _ get that, why don’t you try something new,” the girl opened the glass display and pointed at the mint chocolate chip ice cream, “Like that, mint chocolate chip is my favorite.”

“Of  _ course _ you’ll like toothpaste flavored ice cream,” Catra said, “Plus, you know I can’t eat ice cream.”

The girl gave her a shit eating grin, “Weak.”

“I’m lactose you gremlin!” Catra growled. 

“Same thing,” Frosta snickered, “Imagine not being able to eat dairy, you’re as bad as people who are allergic to peanut butter,” the girl took out an ice cream scooper and started to get Catra’s lemon sorbet, “Like I can just smear peanut butter on one of those suckers and they’ll just die or something. It’s kinda funny if you think about it.” 

Catra started to cackle, “You are the true definition of Gen Z.”

“Shut up boomer,” Frosta said, rolling her eyes again. The little girl walked over to the cashier and slid the cup of sorbet over to Catra, “3 bucks, hand it over or die.”

The brunette gasped in shock, “You’re giving me a discount?”

“I just took like 15 cents off of your order, don’t get a big head about it,” Frosta smirked, “Oh wait, you already have a big head.”

Catra pursed her lips, “Ignoring that…” the girl took out her wallet and gave the girl 5 bucks, “Keep the change,” Catra finger gunned, “I feel generous today.”

Frosta looked at the five bucks and blankly stared at Catra, “Wow, 2 bucks, you’re  _ so _ generous.” 

“You know it,” Catra said, taking a large bite out of her sorbet, “Anyways I’m going to go back to my depression cave, I’ll see you later Elsa,” Catra said sarcastically before she walked out of the ice cream parlor.

The little girl grabbed an old cloth and started to wipe down the counter, she scoffed,

“College students.”

  
  
  


Adora stormed out of the cafeteria and looked at the bench where her and Catra were previously sitting, “She’s already gone?” she muttered, “Ugh, how am I going to find her now? This campus is  _ huge _ and I don’t even know what building she stays at!” 

“Oh right I have Catra’s number,” Adora dug in her pockets and pulled out her phone, pressing on Catra’s contact. 

Adora: Hey Catra! Do you wanna hang out right now, if you’re not too busy that is! :)

The girl walked over to the bench and sat down at it, tapping her foot anxiously as she waited for Catra to reply back. 

15 minutes passed and Adora gave up waiting for a reply. “Where is she?” Adora groaned, “Ugh this is so hard, I can’t go back to Glimmer now or she’ll laugh in my face saying how she was right and how I was wrong.” 

Adora sighed, “Whatever, it’s fine, it’s  _ fine _ , it’s not the end of the world, Catra will eventually look at her phone and reply back. I should probably study right now… but there’s no way I’m going back to the dorm, Glimmer’s probably there and it’ll so awkward,” The blonde stood up from the bench and started to walk towards the direction of the library, “That’s why there’s a library, maybe I’ll even bump into Catra.”

  
  
  


_ The grass felt soft underneath Adora’s bare feet as she ran around the backyard of Hope’s Orphanage. The little girl was so carefree that even when she tripped on the floor, she would always get up, giggling with glee. Adora saw a yellow school bus pull up in front of the orphanage, finally after waiting for an hour it was finally here! _

_ The girl ran up to the fence that separated her from seeing who would come out of the school bus. But was a wooden fence going to stop a determined 10 year old? Fuck no. Adora used all of her strength and pulled herself up on top of the fence.  _

_ She watched closely as the doors of the school bus open and saw a girl with long brunette hair in a tight braid jump out of the bus. The girl looked up at Adora and gave her a big smile. Adora returned the same energy and grinned back, waving her hand excitedly. _

_ “Mara!” _

  
  
  


Adora’s eyes flew open and she took the bio textbook that fell on her head as she was sleeping, off of her. She groaned, “Ugh how long was I asleep…?” She looked at her phone’s lock screen and it was already 6 pm. Her eyes grew wide, “I’ve been asleep for 2 hours?!”

She heard people shush her around the room. Oh right, she was in the library, supposed to be studying and  _ not _ napping.

The girl scratched her head and got up from the desk that she napped on. She grabbed the textbook that she was borrowing and placed it back on the shelf where it belonged. Tired from the day, Adora was ready to go back to her dorm, even if that means being in the same room with Glimmer, so she could actually lie down and nap. The blonde then walked out of the library doors and immediately bumped into someone.

“Oh my god, I am so sorry!” Adora said, her eyes squeezed shut due to the impact, she opened her eyes and saw herself staring back at a set of golden brown and blue pupils. The blonde’s mouth gaped open, “Catra?”

Catra pursed her lips, “Why is it that I always run into you?”

Adora smiled widely, “Oh my god Catra! I’ve been trying to contact you! Did you see the message that I texted you like 2 hours ago?”

“Nope, I don’t check my phone,” the brunette said in a monotone voice.

The taller girl chuckled awkwardly, “That’s great! Well, uh I’ve been meaning to reach out to you because maybe we can hang out or something, or like study together!” Catra raised an eyebrow at her, but Adora kept rambling on, “I always see you sitting all alone and I wanted to just like hang out with you so you aren’t so lonely all the time!”

Catra growled under her breath, “Listen here princess,” she stepped forward and poked Adora’s chest, “I’m alone because I  _ want _ to be alone. You think I want to hang out with the frat boys or sorority girls?” 

The blonde looked at her in surprise, “I-”

“I  _ don’t _ need your pity okay?” Catra said before pushing past Adora and walking into the library.

The girl stood there in shock with her mouth open. She sighed to herself, “I just fucked everything up?” She ran her fingers anxiously through her hair, “Why do I  _ always _ have to say unnecessary things and fuck it up?!”

Adora sighed and looked behind her where the library stood, “Now I’m not so sure if I made the right choice by ignoring Glimmer’s warnings about Catra…”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so to clarify, catra and adora aren't like FRIENDS rn, adora just like occasionally talks to her and catra is just being a grumpy lesbian and just like BARELY tolerates her BUT TRUST THE PROCESS TRUST THE PROCESS MY FRIENDS!! okay i will NOT shut the fuck up about catra and frosts dynamic i said it once and ill say it again the moment i saw frosta SUCKER PUNCH catra in the face in season 5, i immediately loved them together and yes frosta works in an ice cream shop when she's eleven but just saying her parents own it, it's not said in the chapter bc it's not rlly important LOL. OKAY BUT GLIMMER SHUT UP LIKE LET ADORA JUST TALK TO HER GIRL I KNOW YOU WANT WANTS BEST FOR YOUR ROOMIE BUT PLEASEEEE NOWS NOT THE TIME ADORA IS TRYING TO GET AN ANGSTY MUSICIAN ARTIST GIRLFRIEND UR JUST MAKING IT HARDER FOR HER I SWEAR TO GOOOOOOODDDD!!! anyways hope you guys liked this chapter, it was a pretty chill one but we did get to see a VERY small glimpse of mara and adora in the orphanage before adora was given to razz. anyways yeah the next chapter will be a tad less chill i just wanted to give you guys a short break and just like show how things are developing slowly bc this is a slow burn haha anyways yeah please feel free to drop a comment down below and yeah hope you guys have a good morning/afternoon/evening! :)


	5. your hand in my hand

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a glimpse of mara and adora's relationship / catra is unsure about hanging out with adora

_ “Mara! You’re back!” Adora ran up to the girl and gave her a big hug, “I waited like forever for you to come back from school,” the little girl pouted. _

_ The older girl laughed, “You only waited an hour ‘Dora,” Mara leaned down and scooped Adora in her arms, “I missed you too sis.” _

_ The blonde grinned up at her sister, “So do you want to play now? Ms. Hope bought a new ball for us to play with!” _

_ She put Adora down and patted her blonde head, “Sorry ‘Dora, but I have a lot of homework to do right now,” Mara held Adora’s hand and they walked over to a large shady tree, where Mara usually went to study. _

_ Adora frowned, “How come you’re always doing school stuff now? You get out of school later than me and you’re always doing homework now!” _

_ “Well, 11th grade is more difficult than 5th grade,” Mara chuckled before she coughed loudly into her elbow. _

_ Adora cautiously looked at her sister, “Mara are you okay?” _

_ The girl continued to cough violently, “I-I’m fine just go have fun okay? I- I promise I’ll play with you after I finish studying.” _

_ “Promise?” _

_ Mara looked up and grinned at her sister, “I promise.” _

  
  
  


_ Mara got out of the school bus and walked through the yard of the orphanage. She looked at the wooden fence, that’s weird, usually her sister is there waiting to greet her. Mara shrugged, she was probably just playing with the other kids.  _

_ “Hey ‘Dora? You here?” Mara walked through the gate and looked around the yard. She scanned the faces of the other orphans that were playing, but none of them being her sister. The brunette dropped her bag and walked into the building, “Where are you ‘Dora?” _

_ The high school student looked at the front desk where Ms. Hope, the orphanage owner, was scolding her little sister, who was staring at the floor. Ms. Hope looked over at Mara, “Ah, Mara, you’re back, good.” _

_ “What’s going on?” Mara said as she walked up to them, “What happened to ‘Dora?” _

_ The woman sighed, “Your sister was caught stealing some candy. I assume she snatched it from the local convenience store,” Mara’s eyes grew wide, there’s no way! Her sweet little sister wouldn’t do such a thing, would she? Ms. Hope gently pushed Adora towards her sister, “Please talk to her okay Mara? Make her understand that this type of behavior is unacceptable.” _

_ The brunette put her hand on her sister’s shoulder, “Yeah, I will, don’t worry,” she looked down at Adora and sighed, “Come on ‘Dora let’s go to our room.” _

_ The two sisters went into their shared room and Mara closed the door behind her, “What happened ‘Dora? I know for sure that you wouldn’t steal candy! Heck, you wouldn’t even harm a fly!” Adora looked away from Mara, refusing to say anything, the older girl kneeled down and placed a hand on her sister’s shoulder, “Please tell me?” _

_ There was a knock on the bedroom door and Adora pushed Mara’s hand off of her and went to open it. “Hey Daniel,” Adora said to a short brown haired boy. _

_ Mara raised an eyebrow, “What’s Daniel doing here?” _

_ The boy fidgeted with his feet, “Uh, thanks for taking the blame about the candy thing… I don’t think I would have handled Ms. Hope yelling at me,” he lightly punched Adora’s shoulder, “You’re the best Adora!” He then turned around and ran out of the two girl’s sight. _

_ Mara leaned over Adora and closed the door shut, “What was that?”  _

_ Adora sighed, “Ms. Hope saw Hershey’s candy wrappings in the trash can and she asked which one of us stole it, since she never gives us money or buys us that type of candy,” she looked up at her sister who had her hands on her hips, “Daniel was going to get in trouble and he’s my friend! I didn’t want my friend to get in trouble so I lied and said that I took the candy!”  _

_ “Look ‘Dora,” Mara sighed and sat on the edge of her bed, “I know you meant well by taking the blame for your friend, but sometimes you just have to let people deal with their own problems. You can’t be everyone’s hero okay?” _

_ The blonde girl sniffled and looked up at Mara with tears in her eyes, “But… I wanted to be like you because you’re my hero!” Adora said, wiping her tears off with her hands. _

_ Mara sighed and embraced Adora with a warm hug, “I can’t stay mad at that face,” The girl buried her face in the crook of Mara’s neck, “But you don’t have to be anyone’s hero okay ‘Dora?”  _

_ “Okay Mara.” _

  
  
  


Adora walked into her dorm and saw Glimmer studying on her bed, “Hey Glimmer…” Adora sighed, she legatherically went to her bed and collapsed on it.

“Hey Adora,” Glimmer replied, “How was… hanging out with Catra?”

The blonde looked up at her roommate and smiled, “It was fine, we just studied at the library nothing much,” Adora lied. There was  _ no _ way she was going to tell the truth to her roommate, that Catra actually blew her off at the library, since she’ll know she’ll never hear the end of it. 

Glimmer raised an eyebrow, “Oh really?”

“Yeah, y’know she’s actually a pretty nice person,” Adora said, adding on to the lie, “She’s a bit difficult sometimes since she has a lot of walls built up, but other than that, Catra’s pretty chill.” 

The shorter girl closed her laptop and sighed, “Look Adora, I’m sorry for being a bitch about you being friends with Catra. You were right, it’s none of my business who you’re friends with, I can’t control you.” Adora sat up and looked at Glimmer with surprise, “I just wanted the best for you, but if hanging out with Catra makes you happy, it’s whatever. However, I still am skeptical about Catra, so please just watch out okay? I wasn’t lying about how she hurt Entrapta and Scorpia and I don’t want her to hurt you too.”

Adora got up from her bed and hugged Glimmer, “Thanks Glimmer, that means a lot to me coming from you.”

“I’m still against it you know, but if that’s what you want I can’t stop you.”

“I know, but still,” Adora released Glimmer from her grip, “Thanks,” she walked over to her bed to lie down and smiled at the ceiling.  _ I guess that means I just have to continue breaking down Catra’s walls,  _ Adora thought,  _ Not that I mind doing that. _

  
  
  


How did Catra get in this situation again? She looked over at her side and saw Adora chattering about who knows what. She was just peacefully minding her own business reading her favorite book underneath her favorite tree and before she knew it, she’s now taking a walk around campus alongside the most annoying blonde there is. 

“... I used to play soccer in highschool but I got this really bad injury so I just stopped playing,” Adora rambled. 

Catra sighed, all she wanted to do on a nice Friday day was just read and relax. She looked around the campus and saw people looking at her and Adora as they whispered to each other. The brunette started to tune out Adora so she could listen to what the people were saying.

“Man, is the new girl seriously hanging out with her?”

“Damn I thought the new girl was kinda hot, but now she’s hanging out with that delinquent.”

“I bet Catra made the new girl hang out with her.” 

Catra was used to people talking behind her back, she looked over at Adora, but was it right for her to drag Adora’s reputation down with her? It just didn’t seem fair did it? Adora looked over at Catra and smiled, “But at least since I stopped playing soccer I could focus on grades more!” The girl frowned, “Hey! Were you even listening to my story?”

The brunette blinked at her, “It was about some traumatic injury and you can’t play soccer anymore right?” 

Adora smiled, “Yeah basically,” she looked at her phone to check the time, “Shit, I have a lecture in 20 minutes. Do you wanna hang out on the library rooftop later tonight?”

Catra rolled her eyes, “Yeah sure why not, I’m going to be there anyways.”

“Great! I’ll just meet you up there this evening okay? I’ll see you later, bye Catra!” Adora yelled as she jogged in the direction of her lecture hall.

Catra let out a deep breath as she saw Adora jogging away. She thought about those people who were talking behind their backs. The girl frowned “When did I care about what the fuckheads say about me?” she laughed bitterly when a realization hit her, “No way, do I actually care about what people say about  _ her _ ?” 

  
  
  


Excitedly, Adora ran through the library and up the stairwell that led towards the rooftop. She’s been waiting for this moment ever since this afternoon. Adora couldn’t believe it! She’s finally going to hang out with Catra! This is going to be the best night ever!

She opened the door and saw Catra basking in the moonlight like a goddess. The girl’s mismatched eyes looked sadly at her and Adora swore she heard her heart thump. 

“H-hey Catra!” 

“Hey blondie,” Catra said cooly, “Took you long enough to show up.”

Adora walked over to where Catra was sitting and sat next to her, “Y-yeah… sorry about that, I had bio labs today and it was just really hard. My team wasn’t that great either,” she laughed nervously.

The brunette looked up at the twinkling stars, “Good to know,” she muttered, “You know I’m actually glad that you came up to the rooftop tonight.”

The taller girl could feel her face heat up, “R-really?”

“Yeah, I have something important to tell you,” Catra turned her head and looked at Adora in her usual stony face.

“I’m listening!” Adora exclaimed, way too excitedly.

Catra sighed, “Let’s not talk to each other anymore.”

The blonde’s eyes grew wide, “W-wait what?  _ Why _ ?”

The musician sighed, “I’ve been thinking about it and whenever we’re together people give us weird looks and talk behind our back,” Adora opened her mouth to retort something, but Catra wasn’t having it, “Let me finish!” she said sternly, “Look, you’re a new face around BMU, and you have a reputation to hold up. I kinda feel bad, for once, for dragging you down with me.”

“You think I give a damn about reputations?!” Adora yelled, “Look I hang out with you because I  _ want _ to!”

Catra laughed, “I thought that was because you just wanted to keep me company and not make me lonely. Which I said before, I  _ don’t _ want your pity!”

The blonde groaned in frustration, “I didn’t mean it like that! Look, I think you’re really cool and I want to be your friend! I’m  _ not _ pitying you! I hang out with you because I  _ want _ to!” she repeated.

The shorter girl stood up and glared down at Adora, “But why?! You probably know how fucked up I am! You probably know that I fuck everything up! I lost all my friends because I’m a fuckup! You were a star soccer athlete back in high school right? And you had perfect grades! I fucking stole cigerettes in high school and did petty theft! Why would some perfect girl like  _ you _ hang out with a fuckup like  _ me _ ?!” 

“You’re  _ not _ the only one who’s a fuckup!” Adora roared as she stood up from the ground. Catra stepped back at Adora’s voice, she  _ never _ heard anyone yell like that before. “You think I’m perfect?! You’re fucking wrong! I’m fucked up too okay?! My sister fucking dropped me off on a doorstep and left me when I was 12! I don’t even know what happened to her, she just left me without saying anything!”

The blonde kept rambling on, “Oh and the guardian that took care of me after my sister fucking abandoned me? I probably fucked everything up with her too because I had to lash out at her the minute before I got on an Uber to go on a train ride to this fucking college!” 

Adora stepped forward and pushed on Catra’s chest. Being weak and still in a disbelief, the push knocked Catra down to the floor. She looked down at Catra, “So you were fucking wrong about it, I’m fucked up too okay! So don’t think you’re the only one who has problems.”

Catra just looked up and stared at Adora, still in shock.

When Catra didn’t say anything in response, the girl just scoffed and turned her back, “Ugh whatever, I’m outta here,” Adora started to walk towards the door. 

Something snapped in Catra’s head and she reached out to grab Adora’s forearm, “Wait!” Adora looked back at Catra who was holding onto her as the brunette was staring at the ground. Slowly, Catra’s hand slid down Adora’s arm and into her own.

Butterflies fluttered in Adora’s stomach and her face started to heat up again when she felt Catra’s frail cold hands fit perfectly in her own warm rough ones.

The brunette slightly squeezed Adora’s hand, “Please….

_ stay. _ ”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SHE ASKED HER TO STAYYYYYYYYYYYY IM NOT SCREAMING YOU ARE OMGGG!!! I TOLD YOU GUYS TO TRUST THE PROCESS I TOLD YOU GUYS! omg omg omg the next chapter is going to be wild but like in a good way (i think lol) anyways mara and adora's relationship is adorable (no pun intended) even though we only got like a glance at them together so like that's why adora is so torn up about mara leaving her its CLEAR that she really cared about her sister. anyways yes adora really told catra that she's not the only one with problems and she'd do it again bop bop gosh i had so much fun writing this chapter i hope you guys enjoyed it as much as i did haha or that'll be so embarrassing for me LMAO anyways hope you guys liked it again feel free to leave a comment on your opinions of this chapter down below i love reading them in the morning before i go to school it really makes my morning! so hope you all have a good morning/afternoon/evening! :)


	6. eyes are the gateways to the soul

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a bittersweet conversation between the two girls

_ People come and go. _

Throughout her life, many people have left Catra, but she never did anything about it. Before, she thought it was their fault for leaving her so she didn’t think much of it. Now she knows that it was her fault but she still didn’t care, since she thought it was just the way of life. Since, people come and go right?

So, never in her life did Catra think that she would be the one keeping someone from leaving her again. 

“Please… stay,” she said softly. 

Adora wiped the tears that were poking out of her eyes with her free hand, “Okay.”

  
  
  


The two sat in an awkward silence on the rooftop, saying nothing as they listened to the howling wind blow through their ears. Hugging her knees, Catra looked up at Adora who was biting her lip anxiously, the brunette sighed, “Look… ugh fuck how do I say this?” Adora looked up and saw Catra furrowing her eyebrows as the girl thought of something to say.

“Okay,” Catra said after a very awkward minute, “I’m… sorry, it was bitchy of me to not consider your feelings and just assume that you were perfect,” the girl sighed again, “It was hypocritical of me, since when we first met, I told you that you can’t assume anything about me since you knew nothing about me.” Catra let out a dry laugh, “Yet I assumed that you were perfect and I don’t know you that well, if I even know you at all.”

The blonde smiled gently at her, “It’s okay, I wasn’t the best to you either, I kept trying to push your boundaries even though it was clear that you didn’t want anything to do with me,” Adora sniffled as the waterworks came back to her again, “I always thought to myself, how could I let you know that I want to be by your side when you kept pushing me away and not letting me know anything about you? All these thoughts kept running through my mind.”

Adora clenched her teeth as the tears started running down her cheeks, “Next thing you know, tears started to stream down my face.”

The brunette looked startled when Adora started bawling her eyes out. “I’m not worth crying over,” Catra muttered, “Haven’t you heard? I’m the school delinquent, everyone stays away from me. Fuck, even your entire friend group hates me. I’m overall a bad influence so-”

“Why are you lying?” Adora blurted, “Maybe that’s what other people think about you, but there’s no such thing as a bad person. Sure, someone makes bad decisions that can taint their reputation and that’s probably what you have done, judging from what Glimmer has said about you,” Adora looked past her tears and into Catra’s mismatched eyes, “But there’s no way you’re a bad person, I’m certain you have room to grow!”

Adora kept talking, “Maybe you like to act tough and be distant to everyone, but I think in reality you’re a big softie,” Catra scoffed when she heard the bizarre thing that came out of the blonde’s mouth, “I can tell by how expressive you sound when you sing.”

When Adora said the last part, Catra’s heart started to feel lighter in her chest and her cheeks turned a link pink. Since, deep down Catra knew what Adora was saying was true. The two girls looked at each other’s eyes as they sat in a comfortable silence. Catra broke the intense eye contact and spoke up, “Y’know, you’re the first person in about a year who’s ever willingly spoke to me,” she softly chuckled, “Whenever you came up to me I remember always thinking, ‘it’s that annoying girl who keeps calling out my name, I wonder what embarrassing thing she’s going to say today?’ Or, ‘There she is again coming over her with that big dumb smile on her face.’”

“I even thought to myself, ‘Maybe she’s not a bad person if she keeps trying to talk to a disaster like me,’’' Catra started to burst into laughter, “Honestly, you really startled me back there, I didn’t expect you to burst into tears!” Adora turned red with embarrassment and shielded her face with her hands, “I think that was the first time someone ever cried over me. It’s a bit embarrassing but-” she looked up at Adora and wiped a tear of laughter out of the corner of her eye and smiled, “Thanks.”

Butterflies fluttered in Adora’s stomach again when she saw Catra genuinely smile at her for the first time. She wiped the remaining tears out of her sight and smiled back at the girl.  _ No, _ Adora thought,

_ Thank you Catra. _

  
  
  


Catra rested her chin on her hand, “So you also had a rough childhood huh? Well that’s what I’m assuming when you talked about your sister.”

Adora laughed while Catra lay down on the rooftop and stared into the sky. Adora looked at the girl and stared up at the stars too, “Yeah, it wasn’t the best.”

“I feel you, shit can be crazy,” Catra muttered, “I had a fucked up life when I was staying in the orphanage, maybe that’s why I turned out the way I am. Or maybe that’s just an excuse I use to blame my actions on something else.”

“No way!” Adora exclaimed, trying to make the conversation less tense, “You’re from an orphanage too? Same here?”

The brunette turned her head at Adora, “Deadass? I thought your sister was taking care of you, at least that’s what I got when you were ranting about her a minute ago.” 

The other girl nodded, “Well yes, but no,” Adora laughed when she saw Catra’s perplexed face, “Well, Mara, my sister, is 6 years older than me so when she turned 18 and I was 12, she legally adopted me. She worked at a diner so she could provide for me but we could only afford an old, shabby apartment. When she was working at the diner, she met my future guardian, Razz, who worked in the bakery next door.”

  
Catra hummed as she listened to Adora continue her story, “Razz was always kind to me and Mara and we all got pretty close. Whenever Mara was burning herself out, working at the diner, Razz would always bring her meals to make sure my sister was staying healthy,” she smiled sadly, “We lived like that for a year and then the next thing I knew, I was being dropped off at Razz’s doorstep and I never saw my sister again.” 

“Damn that’s…” Catra racked her brain to find something sympathetic to say, “That’s rough buddy,” she blurted out.

Adora snorted, “Don’t worry, I wouldn’t know what to say to me if I was in your situation.” She let out a deep breath, “I always looked up to Mara, she was like my hero, I always wanted to be like her and I think I still try to be like her, even though I despise her for leaving me,” uncontrollable tears streamed out of her eyes again

“You cry too much,” Catra said, looking at how the blonde’s tear’s glistened in the moonlight. The crying girl wiped her tears away and saw that Catra was now looking elsewhere in the distance, “You don’t have to be like your sister, sure you can still be a hero, but you can be your own hero. In order words, just be yourself. Do you get what I’m saying?”

The other girl nodded and Catra sighed, “Well I guess it’s only fair that I tell you a bit of myself. Let’s just say the orphanage I was at was a living hell and that it really messed me up,” she covered her face with her hands, “Then I got adopted by this pretty crappy guy, but at least he gave me as much freedom as I wanted, as long as I treated him with respect. Being trapped in a stuffy orphanage for so long, I abused the freedom and just did whatever I wanted, I stole, I smoked, I skipped classes.” Catra laughed, “To be honest I did all of those shitty things just to get my guardian’s attention, which never happened so I kept being a shitty daughter.”

“The dude didn’t even care when I moved to college, he just paid for it since he’s stinking rich and didn’t even say bye when I left. But whatever it doesn’t matter to me anymore because I’m never going back to that cramped town across the country.” Catra looked over nonchalantly at Adora, “Yeah that’s basically my past in a nutshell.”

Adora nodded, “Thank you for sharing it with me.”

The shorter girl rolled her eyes, “I’m only telling you this because you told me about yourself, it’s only fair. Don’t get a big head or anything,” Catra snickered, “Oh wait you already do,” Adora frowned at the lame joke while Catra thought to herself,  _ Elsa would be so proud of me.  _

The blonde smirked, “Oh yeah? I think you’re finally telling me about yourself because I’m  _ growing _ on you.”

Catra let out a scoff, “This is  _ not _ because I like you!” 

Adora laughed loudly while Catra just scowled at her. After laughing for a couple of seconds, the blonde recollected herself and looked at Catra, “Let’s introduce ourselves properly. A proper start this time. What do you say?”

“...Okay,” Catra said mumbled. 

_ I can’t believe she actually agreed,  _ Adora thought, “Starting with a handshake,” Adora offered her hand to Catra, who just looked at it skeptically. Hesitantly, Catra placed her hand in Adora’s again and she remembered how familiar Adora’s palm felt in hers.

Catra bit her lip and looked into Adora’s eyes, “M-my name’s Catra,  _ just _ Catra.”

“Let’s see…” Adora gave the brunette a fond smile, “Nice to meet you Catra! My name is-”

“ _ Adora _ .”

The blonde looked up at her in surprise, “Huh?”

“Your name… is Adora right?”

Her face started to heat up again and Adora pulled on Catra’s hand to lean forward and rested her head on her shoulder. “Y-yeah it is,” she said into the crook of Catra’s neck, her face burning up like crazy.

Catra looked down at Adora who was still clutching onto her hand while she was being closer to her than ever. The girl gulped and ignored how weird her heart felt in her chest, “W-what are you doing?”

“Sorry… let me stay like this for a moment,” Catra opened her mouth but was cut off by Adora squeezing her hand softly, “Just a minute please.”

One minute felt like an eternity, but for some reason, Catra didn’t hate it. In fact, it felt strangely… comforting.  _ Her hand is trembling… _ Catra thought, she looked down at the girl’s hand which was in fact shaking,  _ She must be as nervous as I am right now. _ Catra softly smiled at Adora, who didn’t dare to look back up at her in the moment. 

“I don't care about rumors or my public image,” Adora muttered into Catra’s chest, “None of it matters to me, so don’t say things about us not talking to each other again. That’s just too cruel. It’s unfair for you to decide that for me too. So please don’t push me away anymore. That’s all I ask for.”

Ignoring the heat that was rising up her neck, Catra rolled her eyes, “You always say these things out of the blue and catch me off guard. How am I supposed to reply to that this time?”

“You don’t have to say anything,” Adora mumbled, “But thank you for listening and lending me your shoulder.” The blonde leaned away from Catra but kept holding onto her hand, “Even though we didn’t really start off well, I’m glad we finally got a chance to know each other better a bit.”

Catra raised an eyebrow, “Aren’t you being too honest right now?”

“I’m a pretty straight forward person,” Adora replied. Again, tears dribbled down the blonde’s cheek as she smiled at Catra.

“Why are you crying again? Is something wrong?” Catra said nervously. 

Adora laughed through her tears and wiped them away with her hand, “Nothing is wrong, everything is fine. I’m just so happy right now! Because did you notice? 

That was the first time you’ve ever said my name.” 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AWHH THESE TWO IDIOTS!!! UGH JUST KISS KISS IN FALL IN LOVE ALREADY YALL ARE ALREADY STARING INTO EACH OTHER'S EYES LIKE CRAZ (hence the chapter name) BRO THIS CHAPTER I HAD SUCH A BLAST WRITING! Catra finally accepted Adora and Adora opened up to her a bit about Mara and Razz and Catra did the same thing a bit but just said it in a nutshell. UGHHH i love these two idiots so much. OKAY so i wanna say this chapter was HEAVILY like HEAVILY inspired by "Not So Shoujo Love Story" on Webtoons, specifically chapter 20. SO GO CHECK THAT WEBTOON OUT IT'S ONE OF MY FAVORITES ITS SO FUNNY THE ART IS GREAT AND ITS GAY OKAY SO GO CHECK IT OUT! ANYWAYS, FINALLY catra and adora are gonna be like ACTUAL FRIENDS WOOHOOOO / adora developing her crush on catra and a bit of vice versa. OKAY i actually really liked how this chapter turned out (shout out to not so shoujo love story on webtoon) and i hope you guys liked it to or i'll just be embarrassed LMAO so hope you guys enjoyed it and please leave a comment on your opinion down below they always make my morning! hope you all have a good morning/afternoon/evening! :)


	7. how many stars are there?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> lesbians stargazing

“...assignment is to fill out a quarter of your sketchbook with detailed sketches of anything you want, but you have to explain why you chose what you drew, and it has to be of significance to you. It's due on Monday,” Professor Netossa announced, “You are dismissed.”

Catra smiled at herself when she heard this week's assignment. She’s going to finish it, no problem. The girl loved drawing and she was pretty good at it if she must say so herself. Catra packed up her books in her bag and started to head out of the lecture hall.

“Catra, a word please?” she heard her professor yell behind her.

A quiet groan of frustration came out under Catra’s breath and she turned around and started walking towards her professor, “Yeah?” she said, trying not to let her annoyance show.

Professor Netossa crossed her arms and smiled kindly at her student, “So have you thought about the offer Spinny gave you a couple of weeks ago?” 

The girl sighed, “Yes, but I don’t need to go to therapy! I’ve been doing just fine. So what if my drawings are sad and depressing and I’ve been sleeping in your wife’s class? I’m just tired okay?” Catra huffed, “But I’ve been doing better now,” she added quietly.

The woman nodded her head, “Alright, alright. I just wanted to check on you because you’re my student and I just wanted to see if you were doing alright, since it’s been a while the last time I’ve checked up on you,” Catra looked away from her and Netossa opened her mouth but was interrupted by a knocking on the wall.

“Hey… is Catra here?” a familiar voice said into the lecture hall. Catra turned her head and saw Adora peering into the room like an idiot. 

Catra shouted, “I told you to wait for me at the cafeteria!”

Adora frowned, “You were taking too long!”

“It’s only been 5 minutes!” 

Netossa coughed and Catra focused her attention back on her professor, “As I was saying… I’ll trust you when you say you’re doing fine, so I’ll see you on Monday. Don’t forget your assignment like last time!”

“That was  _ one _ time!” Catra grumbled, “But yeah, see you Monday.” She jogged towards the door where Adora was giving the girl the most shit eating grin ever, “What?” 

The blonde shrugged, “I can’t believe you forgot your homework, how embarrassing for you. And I thought you were always on top of your game.”

The shorter girl growled, “Like I said, that was  _ one _ time!” Catra shoved Adora’s side into the wall. 

Adora laughed, “Come on are you gonna fight me or are we going to eat lunch already?”

“Giving up I see?” Catra teased.

“In your dreams.”

Catra rolled her eyes, “Whatever, I’m fucking starving.”

Netossa watched as the two girls left the room and she chuckled to herself, “Reminds me of Spinny and I back when we first met. Is she the reason you’re doing better these days, Catra?” 

  
  
  


While stuffing the cafeteria’s roast chicken up her mouth, Catra had her sketchbook open and was frantically drawing on it, “Ugh!” she groaned, “I can’t think of anything to draw! What’s with me today? I was planning on finishing this dumb assignment today too, but I just can’t think of anything!”

Adora twirled her pasta with her plastic spork, “I don’t blame you for not thinking of anything to draw,” she looked around the scenery, “BMU is a pretty bland place to draw in. Maybe you just need a bit of inspiration?”

The brunette snapped her fingers together, “Holy shit, Adora you’re right for once!” The other girl scoffed, “I know the  _ perfect _ place for inspiration! I’m gonna go there tonight!”

“Woah what?” Adora crossed her arms, “I thought we were gonna watch  _ Avatar: The Last Airbender  _ together at your place. Tonight is ‘Cartoon Night!’ We’re still in Season 1 after two weeks and I need to know Zuko’s past!”

Catra raised an eyebrow, “You’re such a dork, we’ll watch it another time,” Adora huffed and angrily twirled the pasta around her spork again. Catra sighed, “Alright, we can watch  _ Avatar  _ tomorrow. Tonight I’ll take you out to where I go for inspiration or to just have a quiet place to stay at.”

Adora laughed, “We go to the rooftops like every week.”

The other girl facepalmed, “No dumbass, it’s another one of my secret places. It’s off campus, plus I’ll think you’ll like it.” Catra stood up and grabbed her tray, “Meet me at my dorm at 10 pm got it? Don’t you dare be late or I’m driving without you.”

“Wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

  
  
  


Catra looked in the mirror and tied her hair up in a messy ponytail. She walked over to her closet and grabbed out a leather jacket, that she hasn’t worn in ages, to wear on top of her usual outfit of choice, gray sweats. As she walked to the bathroom to get changed, there was a knocking at her door, Catra glanced down at her watch and it was 15 minutes till 10. 

_ Why’s she so fucking early? I didn’t even get changed yet,  _ Catra thought. 

She opened the door and saw a grinning Adora all bundled up in coats, half of her face covered with a thick red scarf. “What the fuck are you wearing?” Catra said, trying not to laugh at how stupid she looked, “It looks like you’re about to climb fucking Mount Everest.”

“It’s cold outside okay?” Adora removed her scarf, “But I guess I’ll remove one coat,” Catra snickered as Adora struggled to unzip her puffy jacket, but soon enough, she removed one layer. 

Catra grabbed the red scarf out of Adora’s hand and tied it around her neck, “Here you go princess,” Adora blushed when Catra came close to her and looked away, “There, now you don’t look like you’re about to fall over from how many layers you’re wearing.”

Adora scratched her blushing cheek, “Y-yeah… uh, you ready to go?”

The brunette looked down at her watch, “No dummy, you came so fucking early I didn’t even get a chance to change yet. Why’d you even come so early?”

“I dunno, I was scared that you might leave me,” Adora chuckled.

The girl raised an eyebrow, “Okay weirdo. Wait out here, I’ll be out in 5.” Adora nodded and watched as Catra disappeared into the bathroom.

The blonde wandered around Catra’s room and looked at the drawing on the wall. “Wow… she’s so talented,” Adora whispered. She looked over to the desktop near Catra’s bed and saw that there was a Polaroid picture on it. She leaned closer and picked the picture up, which showed a grumpy Catra, in between a smiling Scorpia and Entrapta. “This must have been before they broke off. I wonder what happened to them.”

She heard the bathroom door unlock and Adora quickly put down the photograph and walked over to where she was standing before. “Hey Adora,” Catra said, putting one arm into her leather jacket, “Ready to go?”

  
  
  


The car ride to Catra’s secret spot was quiet, besides the soft music that played on Catra’s phone. “We’ve been driving for a while…” Adora pointed out, “Where are we going?”

“It’s a pretty remote place, not a lot of people know about it,” Catra grinned ominously at Adora, “Perfect for hiding your body.” 

The blonde yelped and shoved Catra lightly, “Don’t scare me like that!”

“Well don’t push me like that!” Catra replied, “I’m driving you idiot!” The girl apologized under her breath and Catra let out her usual high pitch giggle. She picked up her phone and skipped the current song that her Spotify playlist was playing, which was now currently playing “body bag,” by Machine Gun Kelly. “Oh I  _ love _ this song!” she turned up the volume and smirked, “Plus it makes sense to play this song since I’m going to be putting you in one!”

Adora rolled her eyes, “Ha, ha,” she said sarcastically, “You’re  _ so _ funny.”

Catra ignored her chatty passenger and just sang along to the chorus lyrics. 

_ I’m not mad, I just want us to be better _

_ It feels right when we’re together, okay _

_ I’m not mad, I just cover up my temper _

_ You’re supposed to love me better, baby _

_ So put me in a body bag _

_ So put me in a body bag _

The blonde smiled at the driver, “Wow, even though I love how soft you sounded when I first heard you sang, your voice totally suits rock music.”

Humming along to the song, Catra nodded, “Well, I used to be in a band during my first one and a half years of college. It was pretty great not gonna lie, we played a bunch of my favorite rock songs and performed during school events. I had a blast during those times.”

“Why aren’t you in a band now?” 

Catra’s smile faded and she focused on the road, “It’s… complicated.”

  
  
  


After singing along to many rock songs on the drive, the two girls finally made it to their destination. Catra parked in a pretty shady parking lot on the side of the highway, next to the mountains, “Come on, we have to go to my spot on foot now.”

They got out of the car and Adora looked around the scenery, “It’s so dark…” she jumped back when she saw the dark trees loom over her.

“Don’t tell me you’re scared,” Catra teased, “What, want me to hold your hand or something princess?”

Adora’s face started to heat up, but thankfully since it was so dark, Catra probably couldn’t see her blush, “I’m good,” she managed to murmur out.

Catra hummed, “Then come on,” she took out her phone and shined her flashlight on the ground as they walked up an unpathed trail. The brunette looked down at Adora who was slightly struggling as they hiked up the cliff, “Thought you were a star athlete blondie, some rocks aren’t going to knock you down are they?”

“Ugh, how long till we’re there?” Adora grunted.

The brunette laughed, “Just a couple more steps.” Adora looked up and saw Catra climb up the steep rocks and then disappear at the surface. 

“Catra?” Adora took in a deep breath and quickly climbed up to the top of the rocks and saw her friend standing at the end of the cliff. She walked up to Catra and below her, she saw that there was a lake, glistening under the moonlight, about 10 meters underneath them. 

The shorter girl grinned at Adora, “Pretty cool isn’t it?” she looked up at the clear night sky, “I’ve always explored the cliffs around the lake and this is the only spot where there aren't many trees so you can just take a look at the sky without damn leaves in your face.”

The girl lied down on the soft pillowy grass and took out her sketchbook, “I always go here for peace and quiet when the view from the rooftop is getting a bit too boring,” She got out her pencil and just started to sketch a tall pine tree. 

Adora mimicked Catra and just silently laid down next to her, listening to the soft noises of the pencil sketching on the paper. She gazed up in the night sky and pointed to a group of stars, “Cassiopeia.”

Catra looked away from her sketchbook and looked at where Adora was pointing, “Huh?”

“The constellation, its name is Cassiopeia,” Adora said, stilling pointing towards the heavens, “It’s named after this this Greek queen called Cassiopeia who kept boasting about how beautiful she was,” Catra put down her sketchbook and listened closely to Adora’s tale, “Cassiopeia boasted how more beautiful she was compared to the sea nymphs called the Nereids. The queen’s boasting angered Poseidon and he sent a sea monster, Cetus, to wreck her kingdom.”

The blonde muttered, “Then Cassiopeia and the monster, Cetus, were sent to the stars,” she put her hand down, “At least that’s what I’ve been told.”

The other girl sat up and looked at Adora, “God you’re  _ such _ a nerd. How do you know all of this anyways?”

Adora chuckled, “Well…”

  
  
  


_ “Look it’s the Big Dipper!” Adora exclaimed, pointing at the night sky. _

_ Someone laughed besides her and Adora turned her head where Mara was lying down on the grass next to her, “That’s right Adora, that’s the Big Dipper,” the older girl pointed at another set of stars, “And that’s the Little Dipper,” Mara gasped, “And look it’s Cassiopeia!” _

_ Adora raised an eyebrow and cuddled next to Mara’s side, “What’s Cassiopeia? I never heard of that one before! It sounds like it has an interesting story though. What is it?” _

_ Mara smiled gently at her little sister, “It’s a bit of a scary story, do you think you can handle it?”  _

_ “Of course I can, I'm 9! I’m a big girl now!” Adora said, puffing up her cheeks to look tougher. _

_ The girl laughed and patted Adora’s blonde head, “You got me there,” Mara held her sister close and looked up at the constellation, “Once upon a time…” _

  
  
  


“...my sister told me that story when I was a kid,” Adora smiled, “We would always sneak out of our room in the orphanage when it was dark and stargaze until we passed out. We never got caught though, since Mara always managed to sneak us back inside of our room before the sun rose.”

Catra nodded, “I see,” she grabbed her notebook and looked up at the sky, “Can you point out the constellation again?” Adora nodded and Catra quickly scribbled the stars in her sketchbook. 

The girl tossed the sketchbook aside and lied back down next to Adora, “Y’know what, I think I’ll just finish my assignment tomorrow before ‘Cartoon Night.’ The view is too beautiful right now, so I don’t want to just keep my head buried in my sketchbook and miss out,” she looked over at Adora who was gazing up at the stars.

_ She looks pretty tonight… _ Catra thought. 

“Yeah you’re right,” Adora looked over at Catra and her gray-blue eyes met mismatched eyes. Adora smiled and spoke softly,

  
“The view really  _ is _ beautiful.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was a pretty laid back chapter, it just focuses on adora and catra's friendship and how they've been doing. we learn that they have weekly cartoon nights and just overall bonding with each other. we also see that catra has been doing a bit better than she has in the previous chapters and netossa thinks its because she finally has a friend (adora lol) even netossa can see these dumb lesbians crushing on each other. i want to just say that adora's a simp for catra rn and catra is like slowly developing her crush for adora. so yeah a pretty laid back chapter again it just shows how the two lesbians are doing and its great. we get to also see a bit of more adora and mara content which was pretty sweet. i had a fun time writing this chapter so i hope you guys enjoyed this chapter and feel free to leave a comment down below! i hope you all have a good morning/afternoon/evening! :)


	8. curiosity killed the cat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> catra's life with her new guardian, mr. hordak

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello! just wanted to say that there's a TW : child abuse

**TW: !!! Child Abuse !!!**

_ Holding her new guardian’s hand and suitcase, Catra looked at her friends, Lonnie, Kyle, Rogelio, and the other orphans for one last time, and Ms. Weaver, who was lurking in the shadows. Tears poked out of her eyes, she didn’t know that this would be the last time she would ever see her childhood friends again. Catra looked up at Mr. Hordak, “Can I say goodbye to my friends again sir?”  _

_ The man nodded, “Make it quick, I have business to attend back at home,” Catra nodded and she ran over to Lonnie, Kyle, and Rogelio who all embraced her in one tight group hug. _

_ “I’m going to miss you guys so much,” Catra said, sniffling into Lonnie’s shoulder. _

_ The other girl laughed, “Don’t get all emotional now Catra, your snot is getting on my shirt!” Catra apologized and looked at her friends. Lonnie punched her shoulder, “You better visit us one day now that you’re getting adopted.” _

_ Rogelio nodded, agreeing with Lonnie while Kyle was crying uncontrollably, “Even though you and Lonnie always bullied me, I’m going to miss you so much! Don’t forget about us now that you have a new family! Because,” Rogelio wiped the tears out of Kyle’s eyes for him, “you’ll always be our family okay?” _

_ The brunette sniffled and nodded. “Catra, let’s go,” Mr. Hordak said. The girl turned back and walked towards the man, not taking her eyes off of her three friends. _

_ “We’ll always be family,” Catra muttered to herself. _

  
  
  


_ Throughout the car ride to Crimson Town, Catra noticed how the houses on the streets gradually became bigger and grander compared to the houses back in her old neighborhood. She looked at Mr. Hordak from the backseat, who was concentrating on driving. Catra sighed and rested her chin on her hand as she kept gazing out the car window. _

_ After a long two hour ride back to Crimson Town, Catra got out of the car and awed at her new home. It was a large white mansion that was two stories tall, which had marble pillars which held the roof up. Mr. Hordak gestured to Catra to come inside with him and she quickly ran to his side and walked into the building. _

_ Spinning around the marble floor, Catra exclaimed, “Woah! This place is huge, it's like two times bigger than the orphanage!” _

_ “Welcome to your new home Catra, I hope you enjoy living here,” Mr. Hordak said, taking off his collared blazer and hanging it on a coat rack next to the entrance.  _

_ The brunette looked at the man, “If you have all this space to yourself, you could have filled it up with more children. You could have got my friends out of there so we could all live together here!” _

_ Mr. Hordak let out a forced laughed and patted Catra’s head, “You see, my child, I couldn’t do that since…” he thought of something to say to the girl, “I’m sure other families would be happy to take in your friends and I didn’t want to take them away from their future families.” _

_ Catra sighed, “So we were bound to be separated eventually?” _

_ “That’s right my child,” he placed a hand on Catra’s back and led the girl upstairs, “Let’s get you settled in your new room now.” _

_ The little girl grinned with glee, she couldn’t wait to see how her new room looked in this giant house! As they walked up the grand spiral staircases, Mr. Hordak turned the corner and opened a door, revealing a pink, spacious room that was decorated with rainbows and unicorn stickers. _

_ The two walked into the room and Catra cringed at how colorful her new room was. To be honest, at this moment she preferred the bland and dull room she shared with Lonnie back in the orphanage. “Do you like it?” The man asked, “My staff decorated it themselves when I informed them that I would be adopting you. Girls like unicorns and rainbows right?” _

_ “I-it’s great, thank you,” Catra lied, smiling up at Mr. Hordak. _

_ He ruffled Catra’s hair, “I’m glad you do, anyways I’ll be in my office. Go ahead and make yourself comfortable,” Catra waited until Mr. Hordak closed her door and she let out a big sigh. _

_ The girl walked over to her bed and flopped on it, but it was so soft that her body sunk in it, “What the-” Catra flipped herself around and started punching the mattress, “Why- are- you- so- soft?!” she said in between her punches.  _

_ After beating up her mattress, Catra got her suitcase and opened it on her floor. She took out a black and white photograph of her, Lonnie, Kyle, and Rogelio and placed it on the table besides her bed. Catra smiled fondly at the picture, she remembered taking this picture and that it was in black in white since Ms. Weaver used a camera more ancient than her. _

_ “Ah… I’m going to miss you guys,” Catra smiled, “But… I think I’ll like it here,” she lied down on the floor and stared at the rainbow sticker on her ceiling, “The house is big and Mr. Hordak seems like a nice guy, well he is the mayor of Crimson Town right?”  _

_ She picked up the photograph and clutched it close to her chest, “But I won’t forget that you guys are my original family.” _

  
  
  


_ It’s been 2 weeks since Catra has been adopted, and life wasn’t all so bad there. She now went to a new school and made a bunch of new friends, sure they probably only hang out with her since she’s the mayor’s kid, but whatever she appreciated their company.  _

_ Catra unlocked the door to the mansion and yawned, “I’m home,” she announced. The brunette looked around the first floor in search of Mr. Hordak. Huh that’s weird, usually the man was watching television as he waited to greet her whenever she came back home from school, “Well… I did run home today, so I’m earlier than usual,” she shrugged, “He’s probably upstairs then,” the girl walked up the stairs and towards Mr. Hordak’s office.  _

_ She carefully turned the door handle, but it was locked. Inside the room, she could hear people talking. Being the curious girl she was, Catra pressed her ear against the door and secretly listened to the conversation. _

_ “Sir, your popularity has risen over the last few days, you are bound to win the election next year,” a deep voice said. _

_ The brunette heard Mr. Hordak laugh, “Yes, I know, ever since I’ve adopted Catra, the public sees me as a kind man with a benevolent heart that can tame any feral orphan,” Catra’s eyes grew wide as she heard what her guardian was saying, “Since, there’s a reason why their parents didn’t want them,” he laughed again, “I suppose those wretched orphans are good for one thing.” _

_ The other voice laughed too, “You are brilliant sir!” _

_ “I already know that,” Mr. Hordak said cockily, “Oh look at the time, Catra should be coming home soon, I must leave this call to greet her. I’ll call you back later,” Catra heard the man coming towards the door, but she was too paralyzed by shock to move.  _

_ The door opened and Mr. Hodak looked surprised when he saw Catra in front of him, tears streaming out of her mismatched eyes, “C-Catra?!” _

_ Catra glared at her guardian, the guardian that she thought was her savior from Ms. Weaver, but turns out he was just as much a scoundrel as she was, “Is that all I am to you? Some sort of free ticket to win the next election?! I thought you actually cared about me from the way you treated me!” _

_ Mr. Hordak took a deep breath and adjusted his tie, “Yes, you are only a free ticket to the election from me. Nothing else,” Catra clutched her teeth, “However I suppose now that you know the truth, there’s no need for me to act as the good guy around you anymore.” _

_ “Oh yeah? What’s stopping me from telling the public the truth!” Catra roared, “I’ll go out there and expose your true identity!” _

_ Catra turned away from the man and was about to run out of the door, but Mr. Hordak laughed, “Like the public would listen to a little orphan girl like you. To the eyes of the citizens of Crimson Town, you were a feral orphan that I have learned to control. If you just spew a bunch of allegations against me, no one would believe you since they would just assume that you have gone wild again,” Catra stopped in her steps and turned around to look into the man’s eyes, “So I advise you to stop before you make a mockery out of yourself.” _

_ Trembling where she stood, the tears ran down Catra’s cheeks and she grit her teeth. She thought she got out of the cage which was the orphanage, but she was proven wrong. Was she really trapped again?  _

  
  
  


_ There was a knock on the door and Mr. Hordak opened it and saw two police officers holding a handcuffed Catra. “Sorry to bother you Mr. Hordak, but your daughter was caught stealing cigarettes from the gas station and spraypainting her high school. For the second time this week.” _

_ Catra smirked craftily at her guardian, who wasn’t even looking at her, while the police continued with their report, “When we found her, she ran away from us, but we eventually caught her.” _

_ “Let her go,” Mr. Hordak ordered, “I’ll deal with her at home, so release her this instant!” _

_ The two cops nervously nodded, “Y-yes sir.” _

_ After the officers left, Catra was standing in the living room with Mr. Hordak, “So, are you gonna do something about it or what? You heard the cops, this is the second time I’ve been caught breaking the law this week,” she said nonchalantly.  _

_ “Just go to your room and think about it, I don’t have time for you,” Mr. Hordak said.  _

_ Catra grit her teeth, “What the fuck is wrong with you?! I’ve been doing all of this shit just so I can get your attention again! I’ve been skipping school, stealing, fucking vandelizing, just so you can talk to me properly again like when you first adopted me years ago!” _

_ Mr. Hordak frowned, “Don’t talk back to me. You know the reason why I adopted you, so why do you even try? Plus, I don’t care if you break the law, that’s your decision.” _

_ “I’m tainting your reputation aren’t I?” Catra yelled, “Mayor’s daughter, being a criminal! You don’t care about that?” _

_ “No. This is my last term anyways,” Mr. Hordak said calmly, “And I said, don’t talk back to me.” _

_ The brunette scoffed, “You really are a piece of shit huh? I don’t understand why people even voted for you! It’s clear that you are just a power hungry bastard!” _

_ “I said don’t talk back to me!” Mr. Hordak growled and grabbed Catra by the throat, “I’ve been trying to be flexible with you whenever you broke the law, but now that you dare to show me disrespect. That’s my final straw,” he said, squeezing Catra’s neck harder. _

_ Catra tried to wiggle out of Hordak’s grip, but it was impossible, she was losing sense in her body. She slowly closed her eyes and the last thing she saw was Mr. Hordak’s gleaming eyes and horrible smirk of satisfaction. _

  
  
  


With a gasp, Catra woke up and touched her neck, “Ugh… why’d I have to remember that bastard again?” She looked at her clock, it was 12 pm, “Holy shit! I’m late for class!” She got out of bed quickly and brushed her teeth before putting on a baggy hoodie, she didn’t care if she wasn’t wearing a bra or her pajamas, she just  _ had _ to get to class.

The girl ran through the campus and towards her department. She looked around, where was everyone? She face palmed, they were probably in class already! Right when she turned the corner, she bumped into someone and fell on the floor, “Dammit! Watch where you’re going asshole!” She looked up and saw Adora staring down at her, “Oh… hey Adora.”

“Where are you going?” Adora asked, helping Catra up.

Catra raised an eyebrow, “Are you fucking dumb? I’m going to class and I’m fucking late, so get the fuck out of my way idiot!” 

The blonde laughed, “Watch who you’re calling an idiot, idiot. It’s Thanksgiving break, there’s no classes, everyone went back home to celebrate the holidays.”

The girl smacked her forehead and laughed, “Ugh, I totally forgot,” she looked up at Adora, “Hey why aren’t you back in your hometown? Don’t you have to go back to Razz or something for the holidays?”

“Huh? Oh,” Adora bit her lip nervously, “I can’t go… I’m scared, what if she’s mad at me? I left for college when we were arguing, what if she didn’t forgive me yet?” 

Catra placed a hand on Adora’s shoulder, “Hey, it’s okay if you’re not ready to go back yet,” Adora hung her head and slightly nodded, “But you can’t just keep avoiding it, eventually you’ll have to talk to Razz again and clear things up with her.”

Adora sighed, “Yeah I know, but I’m scared.”

The brunette nodded, “And that’s okay, how about this, you don’t have to go back to her this break. But after finals and during Winter break, you  _ have _ to go see her. I can even come with you if you want,” Catra blushed at the offer she gave Adora and looked away, rubbing the back of her neck, “Y'know to keep you company during the car ride or whatever,” she murmured. 

The other girl smiled thankfully, “You’ll do that for me?”

“It’s not because I like you,” Catra huffed, “But yeah sure, whatever. But you have to promise that you’ll talk to Razz during Winter break,” Adora nodded again and stuck out her pinky towards Catra. The shorter girl snickered, “What are we 8?” Adora pursed her lips and shook her pinky at Catra, “Ugh fine,” she said, lacing her pinky with Adora’s.

The blonde smiled, “It’s a promise then.”

  
  
  


Adora opened the door to her dorm and let Catra in after they had lunch together. Catra looked around the dorm, “Woah, it’s way bigger than mine! Now that I think about I’ve never really been to your place.”

“Yeah… Glimmer isn’t the biggest fan of you so I didn’t want to cause a commotion,” Adora chuckled nervously.

Catra nodded, “That’s fair. How’s Sparkles doing anyways?” 

The blonde walked over to her bed and got out her laptop so they could finish the second season of  _ Avatar: The Last Airbender,  _ “She went back to her parents for break, she asked me if I wanted to come but I declined. I didn’t want to intrude on their family time,” The girl’s phone buzzed and Adora took it out and saw a message from Razz. Hesitantly she opened the message from the woman.

Razz: Adora dearie, are you coming back for Thanksgiving?

The girl looked at Razz’s previous messages that she sent after she left for college and the guilt of not replying got into her head. Adora sighed and typed out a response.

Adora: Sorry Razz, I have volunteer hours to do at school. Plus I have a lot of work. I’m sorry! Happy Thanksgiving though!

Catra looked at Adora who was biting her lip hard as she sent that text, “Who you talking to?”

Putting her phone away, Adora smiled at Catra, “No one,” she felt her phone buzz again in her pocket, but didn’t have the heart to read Razz’s message. Adora bit her lip again and went on Netflix, “Come on let’s finish this season already.”

“Yeah, Azula is so hot,” Catra laughed. 

Adora raised an eyebrow, “I’m more of a Katara and Ty Lee girl, but yeah Azula is pretty hot. But you have to remember that they’re like 14.”

The brunette hummed, “Can you catch a case for cartoon pixels?”

The other girl shrugged and they watched the show in a comfortable silence while lying on her bed. Adora sighed and thought,  _ I’m sorry Razz, but I’ll see you soon. _

_ I promise. _

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well there you have it, catra's life back when she was living with a piece of shit called hordak. DAMMIT WHY CANT ANY AUDLT FIGURE TREAT MY BABY CATRA RIGHT (besides nettosa and spinnerella those two are fucking goddesses) anyways yeah hordak never really cared about catra he just wanted something so that the public could see him as a good person even though he's a piece of shit. yeah, adora isn't doing that great with razz either she's scared that razz is still angry but come on adora it's razz JUST GO TO HER AND TALK IT OUT DAMMIT!!!! but we'll get that eventually since adora pinky promised catra that she'll go to razz during winter break :) anyways hope you guys enjoyed this chapter and yeah feel free to leave a comment down below! hope yall all have a good morning/afternoon/evening! :)


	9. reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> best friend squad hangout / adora and catra study session

After spending 5 days of Thanksgiving break with Catra, Adora’s roommate, Glimmer, finally came back to BMU after spending the holidays with her family. The cotton candy haired girl flopped on her bed after putting her suitcase down, “Ugh, I forgot how exhausting my family could be sometimes.”

“Isn’t your mom like the dean of BMU though?” Adora asked, “Don't you see her sometimes on campus?” 

Glimmer flipped herself over and faced her roommate, “Well I wouldn’t know. I always avoid her,” Adora snorted and Glimmer laughed, “Seriously! I memorized her schedule  _ and _ changed my path to lectures so I don’t run into her.”

“Glimmer you’re so extra.”

The girl nodded, “I know that,” a phone rang and she took out her phone from her pocket, “Hey it’s Bow,” she picked up the call, “Hey babe what’s up?” The girl nodded her head, “Mhm…” Glimmer looked up at Adora who was on her laptop, “Hey Adora, Bow is gonna come back in an hour and is craving Korean barbeque, you down?” 

The blonde grinned, “Is that even a question?”

“Yeah, we’ll meet you there,” Glimmer spoke into the phone before she hung up. The girl stood up and looked through her drawers to find an outfit to wear. 

Adora sat up from her bed and looked curiously at her roommate, “You’re getting ready already? I thought it was in an hour.”

Glimmer hummed, “The place is like 30 minutes away and I wanna look good. I hadn’t seen Bow in a week,” Adora scoffed, “Hey! You would want to look good too if you really liked someone! So don’t make fun of me.”

She rubbed her chin,  _ I mean… I kinda wanna look good for her, but I don’t really care,  _ Adora thought to herself,  _ Most of the time I hang out with Catra, we just wear sweats. Well… maybe that’s because we only watch Netflix when we hang out. _

“...get ready.”

Her train of thought broke and she looked up at Glimmer who was staring at her, “Sorry what was that?” 

“I’m gonna take a shower and after I’m done we’re gonna leave. So you should get ready,” she repeated. Adora nodded and started to look through her closet after Glimmer disappeared into the bathroom.

After 15 minutes, Glimmer came out of the bathroom, drying her hair, “Okay come on, Bow already made a reservation at the place so we just have to get a table and wait for him.” Wearing her usual red soccer highschool varsity jacket, Adora stood up from her bed and gave her friend a thumbs up.

Twirling car keys with her pointer finger Glimmer grinned, “Barbeque time!”

  
  
  


The two girls waited in a booth in a dimly lit, all you can eat Korean barbeque restaurant as they wanted for Bow to come. Glimmer looked through the menu, “Should we order the meat now so we can just cook when Bow comes?”

“Yeah sure,” Adora nodded, scanning through the menu too, “Ooh! Can I cook?”

The girl peered at Adora above her menu, “Oh  _ hell _ no,” Glimmer said sternly, “You know well enough that neither of us can cook, so Bow’s going to be handling the meats.”

“Yeah, there’s no way I’m going to be trusting you two with the meats,” a voice said. Glimmer turned her head and saw her boyfriend standing next to the table, grinning ear to ear, “Miss me?”

She stood up and embraced Bow in a tight hug, “Oh my god! Fuck yeah did I miss you!” Bow looked down and exchanged a smile at Adora who waved at him.

The boy laughed, “Alright, alright, Glimmer you’re gonna squeeze my guts out! Come on let’s sit down and order alright, I’m starving,” he quickly looked through the menu and called a waiter over, “Hi! Uh so we’ll get the bulgogi, galbi, and the spicy pork. Thank you!” When the waiter left with their orders, Bow looked at the two girls, “So how was your break so far?”

Adora shrugged, “Nothing much I just stayed on campus and just watched Netflix with Catra.”

The blonde saw how Glimmer pursed her lips with the mention of Catra. She knew that Glimmer still had trouble understanding that the two were now close friends. Bow coughed and smiled to break the tension in the table, “That’s nice! How is Catra anyways?”

“She’s doing well, we got closer in the last couple weeks so that’s nice,” Adora smiled, not daring to make eye contact with Glimmer, “But how was your break?”

Bow smiled, “It was pretty good it was cool to see all of my brothers and dads again. Though the turkey literally exploded when we tried to fry it, it was pretty crazy. I even have a video of it,” he laughed and nudged Glimmer’s shoulder, “What about you babe?”

The girl thought for a second, “Hm, it was nothing much I just caught up with my mom and dad. Ooh! Aunt Casta even showed up for a second, she’s doing well,” she laughed, “But I think she got a bit offended since I wasn’t wearing the sweater she knitted me before,” Glimmer pursed her lips, “She always gives me her ugly knitted Christmas sweaters during the holiday, she even gave Bow one when I introduced him.”

“I like my sweater! They’re pretty comfy, a bit itchy… but other than that they’re nice,” Bow grinned, “Maybe you’ll get one too Adora!”

The blonde laughed nervously, “Yeah maybe.” 

While the group talked for a few more minutes, one of the waiters came out with their plates of meat and Bow started to cook for his friends. The bow hummed as the meat seared on the hot grill, “This is nice, we haven’t really had a Best Friend Squad hang out in a while. Plus, I think this will be the last one for a while since finals are coming up next month too.”

Glimmer let out a loud groan and stuffed a piece of cooked meat in her mouth, “Ugh don’t remind me Bow, I’m  _ so _ ready for Winter break but I do  _ not _ want to go through finals before that.”

Adora took a sip of water, “Same… I’m going to start studying for finals tomorrow. I am not prepared at all.”

The boy laughed, “Sorry for bringing it up, let’s just eat and relax for now then.”

The three college students spent the rest of the night at the restaurant as they all stuffed their face with side dishes and meat as they chatted amongst each other. Adora clutched her stomach ache and looked at Bow and Glimmer who were flirting with each other on the other side of the table. The blonde smiled and thought,

_ Yeah… this is nice. _

  
  
  


Twirling her pencil in her hand, Catra looked around the library in search of Adora, “God, why’s she so fucking late, when  _ she _ was the one who planned this?” Catra grumbled to herself. The girl huffed and just started to study by herself. 

Five minutes passed and Catra heard the chair next to her pull out, “Hey, sorry I’m late, my bio professor did  _ not _ want to let us out of class,” she laughed, “Did you wait long?” 

“A bit,” Catra said, looking up from her sketchbook, she looked down at her watch, it was 9:05 pm, “You’re always either  _ super _ early or late, there’s no in between,” Catra said, giving Adora a shit eating grin.

Adora apologized and sat down on her chair, taking out her books, “Anyways let’s just study a bit.”

The brunette rolled her eyes and fixed her black cap, “I don’t even know why you asked to study together, we have  _ completely _ different majors.”

“I know, but it’s just fun to study with someone,” Adora looked over at Catra who was still giving her a weird look, “Okay, it’s fun to  _ sit _ with someone while you study.”

Catra laughed, “Alright princess.”

The blonde smiled and started to read through her textbook. A second later she felt Catra tap her shoulder, Adora looked at her and saw Catra handing her a tangerine, but not making eye contact with her. “What the heck? Catra we’re not supposed to have snacks in the library!” she whispered.

The shorter girl turned her head and frowned, “If we don’t get caught we don’t have any snacks!” Catra hissed, “Just take the damn tangerine!”

Adora sighed and took the snack.

Another minute passed and the girl saw Catra sliding a piece of milk bread next to her. She didn’t think any of it and gratefully took the bread. What, the girl was hungry okay? Adora noticed that every time she finished eating the snack that Catra gave her, the brunette would just keep giving her more. Gummies, fruits, strawberry milk, you name it, Catra gave it to her.

_ W-wait,  _ Adora thought, after receiving a gummy worms,  _ Where the fuck is she getting all of these snacks?  _

The girl nudged Catra, “Stop stuffing me I’m going to get fat!”

“Deal with it, it’s how I show affection okay?” Catra said, not taking her eyes off of the drawing she’s sketching.

The blonde blushed and looked away from Catra. 

_ Affection huh…? _

  
  
  


Adora opened her eyes and saw Catra’s head resting on the library table. Good thing Catra’s eyes were fluttered shut or Adora would be staring right into Catra’s gorgeous mismatched eyes. The blonde quickly sat up, “W-what the hell?” she whispered to herself. She looked at her phone to check the time, it was already 5 am. Adora slapped Catra’s cheek and immediately, the brunette sat up and glared at Adora.

“What the fuck?!” Catra shouted. Even though it was a library, no one was around to shush her. The girl checked her watch and noticed the time, “Ah fuck, we must have fallen asleep!”

The other girl groaned, “It was probably all of those snacks that I’ve ate that made me fall asleep. Why didn’t you wake me up?”

Catra shrugged, “Dunno, you looked tired and I just wanted to let you rest. So I just stayed so nothing bad would happen to you…” she said, putting on her black cap that fell off her head when she napped, “I guess I eventually fell asleep too.”

The blonde blushed when she saw how scruffy and cute Catra’s bed head was. “I can’t believe we didn’t get kicked out though…” Adora muttered.

“The librarian doesn’t give a shit huh?” Catra laughed as she got up from her chair and stretched her arms, “Come on let’s get outta here and get some drinks at the vending machine or something. I’m fucking thirsty.”

The two girls packed up their bags and walked over to the cafeteria to get drinks from the vending machine outside. They sat down at the bench while Catra was sipping bottled coffee while Adora was being a literal 5 year old and was drinking an apple juice box.

“Thanks for paying for my apple juice. It was pretty nice of you,” Adora said happily.

The brunette rolled her eyes, “It was like a dollar and I am  _ not _ a nice person!”

Adora laughed, “Yeah right! You even waited for me at the library when I fell asleep! To make sure nothing bad would happen to me huh?” The blonde said cockily, nudging Catra’s shoulder. “You always do these nice things for me and say nice shit. I told you before, you always like to act tough, but in reality you’re a big softie,” she said, punching Catra’s shoulder. The girl chuckled, “You should stop doing these nice things to me. It makes me feel all weird inside!”

The two girls stared at each other and Adora turned around to hide her blush from Catra. 

Her heart beated like crazy,  _ Oh god… _ Adora thought,  _ I hope she doesn’t understand I actually mean! _

The brunette frowned as she looked at Adora, who was looking at the ground,  _ Is she saying that I’m upsetting her? _ Catra thought.

Adora coughed and looked up at the sky, “Oh, the sun is rising…” she turned around to Catra and smiled, “It’s so beautiful!”

The other girl nodded and tilted her cap down so she could secretly look at Adora awe at the sunrise, without having the girl make a fuss about it.  _ I don’t do those things because I’m nice,  _ Catra thought, 

_ I only do those things because it’s you.  _

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> catra you goddamn SIMP. yeah this was another pretty chill chapter i just wanted a cute moment with the BFS yknow just them eating and chilling out before their break ends. college student shit. but then there's finals and adora being a simp wants to study with her crush but then catra's love language is giving people food (dont judge me its my head canon) but then adora gets stuffed and falls asleep during studying. and then catra is being a sweetheart and stays with adora and adora wakes up only to see catra asleep in front of her. but she's an idiot so instead of her just having a soft moment with catra (who's still asleep) she fucking bitch slaps catra to wake up but hey they end up getting a soft moment together when they watch the sun rise. god they're so gay. anyways the studying moment was inspired by a webtoon "To Love Your Enemy"(specifically chapter 31-32) that's a great webtoon so go check it out! anyways hope you guys enjoyed this chapter and feel free to leave a comment down below! hope you guys all have a good morning/afternoon/evening! :)


	10. broken promises

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a peek at adora and razz's relationship

_ Holding Mara’s hand, Adora looked up and saw her sister talking to Razz. Adora looked down at the suitcase she was holding her other hand. Was she and Mara going to stay with Razz now? Not that Adora really minded, she never really liked the old apartment she and her sister were staying in. _

_ “Will that be okay for you Razz?” _

_ The old woman smiled and patted Adora’s head, “Of course Mara dearie, I’ll be happy to take care of Adora.” _

_ Adora raised her eyebrow. Wait, was Mara not going to be staying with them too? _

_ The brunette smiled thankfully and hugged Razz, “Thank you so much!” The girl kneeled down and faced Adora, “Hey ‘Dora. So, I’m going to be going away for a bit and Razz here is going to be taking care of you while I’m gone. Be a good girl and make sure you don’t give Razz too much trouble.” _

_ She pouted and tugged on Mara’s sweater, “Why can’t I go with you? Where are you even going Mara?” _

_ Mara coughed into her shoulder, “Sorry kiddo, but you can’t go with me this time, so just stay with Razz okay? She’ll take good care of you ‘Dora.” _

_ Tears poked out of the corner of Adora’s eyes, she sniffled, “When will I see you again sis?” _

_ “Soon ‘Dora,” Mara said, smiling sadly, “I’ll see you soon, I promise,” the girl stuck out her pinky and laced it with Adora’s, “See? That’s a sign of a promise,” she stood up and started walking towards her old car, “Bye Razz! Bye Adora! I’ll see you two soon!” _

_ Waving goodbye to her sister, Adora shouted, “You better! You promised!”  _

_ Mara smiled before she got into her car. She watched Razz lead Adora in her house and close the door. The girl coughed violently again and fell forward on her steering wheel. Tears ran down her cheek and she whispered, “I’m sorry Adora. I’m sorry Razz. Please don’t despise me too much for this…” _

  
  
  


_ Razz hummed as she put her pie into the oven. Even though she retired and sold her bakery, days after she took in Adora, she always loved baking, especially for a certain little blonde girl. The woman walked over to her couch and turned on the news as she waited for her pie to finish baking in the oven. _

_ Not even 5 minutes later, the back door slammed open and Adora came crying towards Razz. “Razz!” Adora bawled. _

_ The woman put on her glasses and hugged the little girl, “What’s wrong dearie?” Adora wiped her tears away with her sleeve and showed her scrapped hands to Razz. She clicked her tongue, “Oh no, did you get hurt playing again?” The little girl nodded, “Wait right here, I’m going to get some bandages for you.” _

_ She uttered out an, “Okay,” and watched Razz get some medical supplies from the kitchen. _

_ “Here you go dearie,” Razz said softly as she wrapped a white bandage around Adora’s palm, “Go outside and play again okay? I’ll call you back in when the pie is ready to eat.”  _

_ The blonde sighed and sat on the couch, “Don’t wanna,” she pouted, “It’s no fun playing by yourself,” Adora looked up, “I miss Mara, Razz. When is she coming back? It’s been two weeks already. She promised she’ll come back soon…” _

_ Razz sighed, “I don’t know when Mara’s coming back dearie,” she looked up and smiled at the girl, “But don’t you worry dearie, I’ll find a new friend for you. They won’t be able to replace our dear Mara, but it’s just so you won’t have to play alone when I’m busy. How does that sound?” _

_ Slowly, Adora shook her head, “Mm… okay,” she murmured. _

_ The woman smiled and kissed Adora’s forehead, “Alright, now do you want to help Madame Razz, by going to the store with me to get ice cream for our pie?” Adora gave her a toothy grin and a thumbs up. _

  
  
  


_ “Here you go dearie, I bought it just for you. I hope you like it!” _

_ Adora raised an eyebrow, “What’s this for?” She opened a small box which revealed a unicorn stuffed animal inside of it.  _

_ Razz chuckled, “It’s not much but I remember saying that I’ll buy you something new to play with, since I remember you said you didn’t like playing outside alone. Though, I suppose you’re a bit too old for dolls…” _

_ The blonde grinned at Razz and hugged her, “No I love it Razz, thank you so much, for everything.” _

_ “What are you going to name it?” _

_ She thought for a moment, “Hm… Swift Wind! Swiftie for short!” Adora hugged the woman again, “I love you Razz.” _

_ The old woman kissed the top of Adora’s head and whispered, “I love you too dearie.” _

  
  
  


_ Whenever Adora was at school, Razz usually spent her time cleaning the house and cooking lunch so the girl could eat after a long day of school. The doorbell rang and Razz scurried over to open it. She opened the door and looked around, no one was there. She then looked down and saw a little brown package on the doorstep. _

_ Curiously, Razz picked the box up and went to the couch and opened it. She noticed that there was a DVD inside of it and that there was no return address. Along with the DVD, there was also a note placed inside it addressed to her.  _

_ The woman took out the note and started to read it. _

_ Dear Razz,  _

_ I hope you and Adora are doing well. I’m so sorry that I can’t talk to you in person, it is out of my capability at the moment. I will be leaving and I’m afraid I cannot take Adora with me. I’m very sorry, but I trust that you will keep my sister safe. Please do not worry about me, I am doing just fine, it’s just that I cannot take Adora with me. Inside of this package there is a DVD, I want you and Adora to watch it together whenever you are ready to. Since I understand if the two of you are upset with me. Again, I am sorry for suddenly telling you this. I hope you know that I love you and miss you both very much.  _

_ Regards, _

_ Mara _

_ Shakily, Razz put the letter in her pocket and quietly let tears run down her face. She heard keys turn in the door, which meant Adora was already home from school. The woman quickly kicked the package underneath the gap of the couch and wiped her tears away. “Adora dearie is that you there?” _

_ “Hi Razz!” Adora replied.  _

_ The woman stood up from her couch and hugged Adora, “How was school dearie?” _

_ The blonde smiled, “It was great! Plus, it’s my birthday in a couple of days, I’m about to be a teenager! Can you believe that?”  _

_ Razz sighed, “You’re growing up so fast dearie. Soon you’ll be just like Mara, all independent and grown up.” _

_ Adora frowned at the mention of her sister, “I don’t want to be like her,” Razz stared at the girl in shock, “Mara… she left us, and I don’t want to be someone who runs away from family without saying anything. I don’t want to be someone who breaks promises!” She clenched her teeth, “I’m going to make sure that when I grow up, I’ll be nothing like her!” _

_ The girl then turned her back and started to head to her room. “Adora! Adora dearie!” Razz yelled after her. The woman sighed and took the package out from under the couch. She looked at the DVD and grimaced, _

_ “I suppose we’ll have to wait to see what Mara left us…” _

  
  
  


December went by in a flash. The two weeks the college students had to study before finals happened within seconds and before they knew it, it was finals week. Even though it was stressful, Adora was thankful for her study sessions, especially the ones with Catra, since she made studying more interesting. Plus even though the two girls goofed up a lot, she really felt prepared to face her finals before Winter break.

Finally, it was the last final of the semester and Adora knew the second she submitted her paper, she was getting the fuck out of that lecture hall. But-  _ fuck _ there was  _ always _ a but. Adora was also nervous for Winter break because she remembered the promise that she and Catra made and that she had to go and visit Razz for the first time in months. And there was  _ no _ way in hell she was going to break a promise. 

Mentally, Adora slapped herself, she couldn’t think about her personal problems right now! She was taking her goddamn bio final, which was the one that she was the most nervous for.

Focus Adora,  _ focus _ ! 

  
  
  


An hour and a half passed and Adora submitted her paper. She was free! Adora got out her phone and looked at Catra’s last text.

Catra: your last final ends at 4 right? ill be at your dorm at 4:15 you better be already done packing so we can catch our train

Adora groaned, fuck she didn’t even start packing yet because she was so stressed out for her finals! The blonde sprinted towards her dorm and barged the door open. Good thing Glimmer was already done with finals and with her family right now, since the girl would complain on how fucking loud Adora was.

She grabbed her suitcase that was in the corner of the room and just started mindlessly throwing her clothes inside of the suitcase. She didn’t have any time to waste, Catra was probably heading over to her dorm right at this moment and she didn’t feel like being made fun of by the brunette.

The blonde rushed into her bathroom and grabbed her personal hygiene supplies as well as a bit of makeup. What? She needed to look good for Razz since she hadn’t seen her in forever. This was probably the only time she was going to be wearing makeup. Without hesitation, the girl put on some foundation and messily drew on eyeliner. She looked at her reflection but, to be honest, she looked like a total clown, she didn’t know shit about makeup!

Adora heard a knock on the door and jumped up, fuck Catra was here and she didn’t have time to take off the horrible makeup on her face! Slowly, she opened the door and saw Catra staring right back at her.

The two girls stood in an awkward silence until Catra started to cackle, “Oh my god, I’m sorry, but what the  _ fuck _ is wrong with your face?”

The other girl looked away and blushed, “I wanted to look good since we’re going back to my hometown and I’m fucking nervous okay? I wanna look good when Razz sees me again and I've never really done makeup before.”

Catra laughed and walked inside the dorm, “Alright princess, I’ll do it for you.”

“Really?”

The brunette shrugged, “Yeah why not, I’m pretty good at my own makeup, what do you think?” She leaned her face towards Adora, their noses centimeters away. But being a disaster lesbian, Adora blushed and jumped back. Catra laughed and they walked into the bathroom. The girl opened a drawer and got out makeup wipes and started to remove the horrid foundation that didn’t even match Adora’s skin tone, off of her. 

“Hm… you don’t really need foundation, your skin is already literally perfect,” Catra said to herself, “Close your eyes, I’m going to redraw eyeliner on you. And  _ don’t _ fucking move, unless you want your eyeball to be poked out.”

Adora nodded and obeyed. She knew that Catra probably wouldn’t really care if she poked out her eyes. After 2 minutes of Catra drawing on her, the blonde opened her eyes again and looked at her reflection, “Woah… I actually look okay! You drew these really well.”

Catra shrugged, “I  _ am _ an art major after all,” Adora laughed and started to walk out of the bathroom but Catra stopped her, “Hold your horses princess,” she twirled a tube of lipgloss with her fingers, “I’m not done with you yet.”

Flushing red, Adora gulped and nodded. Catra put some of the pink lipgloss on her finger and started to smear it gently on Adora’s lips. The brunette’s cheeks turned the color of the lipgloss when she touched the blonde’s lips.  _ Her lips are so soft…  _ she thought.

After applying the lipgloss on her Catra smiled, “All done! Anyways, since you wanna look good, I’m going to give you time to change outta your sweats that you probably slept in,” she walked out of the bathroom and smirked, “Tell me when you’re ready princess,” before closing the door.

5 minutes later, Adora walked out of the bathroom wearing a pair of jeans and her usual red varsity jacket with a white long sleeve underneath. It was better than wearing gray sweats okay? Adora looked at Catra who was leaning against the doorframe, twirling her car keys with her middle finger.

“Took you long enough. Let’s go princess.”

  
  
  


After driving 20 minutes to the train station. The two girls boarded the train and sat on their seats. Catra tilted her usual black hat to cover her face and dozed off during the trainride. Adora sighed and looked out of the window. She felt her phone buzz in her right pocket and checked the message.

Razz: Adora dearie, are you coming back for the holidays?

The girl put her phone away without replying. Though it was cruel to ignore the poor old lady, she wanted to surprise Razz with her sudden visit. Adora felt Catra’s head rest on her shoulder as she slept and Adora smiled at her friend. The blonde then tilted her head to rest on Catra’s and thought,

_ Don’t worry Razz. I’ll be home soon. Just wait for me.  _

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whew so next chapter we're gonna see adora and razz reunite and that's going to be something. this was a pretty chill ish chapter we got to see mara leave adora at razz's and learned that razz sold her bakery so she could pay attention more to adora bc mara wanted razz to take care of adora. and yeah we learned that mara sent razz the dvd along with a note saying like how she's leaving and whatnot and good news ill give you guys a sneak peak to the next chapter: we get to see the DVD!!!! so yayyy!! stick around to see that lol it's going to be something! anyways ughh i cant wait to write adora and razz seeing each other again its gonna be pretty bittersweet but fluffy nevertheless! and catra is just there like "nice we got the band back together" (foreshadowing LOL) anyways yeah hope you guys liked this chapter it was a pretty chill ish one and feel free to comment down below ! thank you so much to those you are still reading this rollercoaster of a fanfic haha it means a lot to me! hope you guys all have a good morning/afternoon/evening! :)


	11. hometown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> with catra's company, adora goes back to her hometown to visit razz over the holidays

Adrenaline pulsed through Adora’s blood as she and Catra were riding an Uber towards her old house from the train station. Unlike Adora, who was wide the whole train ride, since her anxiety didn’t let her rest, Catra was exhausted right now and kept her head rested on Adora’s shoulder throughout the car ride. Since she was knocked out for the past four hours.

The blonde stared out the window and saw the snow fall on the familiar streets she grew up in. She remembered the times where she and Razz would always take a walk around the neighborhoods. She remembered how ignorant she was as a child, hoping that her sister would come back, but as she grew up, reality hit her and Adora knew that her sister would never come back. 

_ I can’t believe that I let my sister’s memory come between me and Razz,  _ Adora thought,  _ It wasn’t fair for Razz so I have to make this right. Razz was the one who always took care for me and now, it’s time for me to step up and take care of her.  _

The car stopped and Adora shook Catra awake again, “Hey… we’re here,” she whispered.

Catra lifted her head from Adora’s shoulder, even though she wouldn’t admit it, Adora missed the weight that was previously there. The brunette rubbed her eyes and looked out the window, “Mm…” she groaned, “Okay princess, let’s go.”

Holding their luggage, the two girls got out and started walking towards the house. Catra looked down at her watch, it was about to be midnight, “Will Razz even be awake?” The girl asked. Adora ignored the question as they approached the front porch, which immediately lit up at their presence. The blonde’s hand started to shake as she reached to press the doorbell, Catra immediately took notice and put her hand on top of Adora’s. “Hey… it’ll be alright, I’m here with you.”

Adora let out a shaky breath and nodded. The brunette smiled, “We do this together,” Guiding the blonde’s hand, they both reached out towards the doorbell and pressed it. Not even a minute passed since the doorbell rang and the front door opened up to reveal an old woman wearing pink pajamas, who wore thick glasses looking right into Adora’s eyes.

“Is that you Adora…?” 

Catra saw how Adora was frozen in shock and couldn’t move from where she stood. Tears ran down both the old woman’s and Adora’s eyes and Adora looked at the ground as she spoke, “Razz… I know that you might be shocked to see me… but I just came because I wanted to apologize and make things right. It was wrong for me to yell at you and I’m sorry for hurting you.”

Without a word, Razz embraced Adora in a tight hug and the girl looked at the old woman in shock, “H-how could you forgive me so easily? Aren’t you mad at me?” 

“I was never mad at you dearie,” Razz whispered.

The blonde looked at the woman and wiped her tears away, “I- I thought you were mad at me because I left you since I was angry over that  _ stupid _ DVD that Mara left for us,” Adora kneeled down in front of Razz and sobbed, “I’m sorry Razz, I’m sorry I left you. I told myself I wouldn’t be like Mara but I  _ am _ since I left you. I’m sorry please forgive me.”

Razz held both of Adora’s hands and helped her stand up, “Oh dearie, I was never mad at you,” she repeated, “I couldn’t be if I wanted to. I was sad and hurt yes… but  _ never _ angry!” Razz kissed Adora’s cheek and smiled sadly, “I forgive you dearie, don’t worry about it okay? Mostly, I was just saddened that you never visited poor old Madame Razz.”

“I’m sorry Razz-”

“But you’re here now,” the woman interrupted, “and that’s all that matters to me. Come on in dearie, we have much to talk about!” 

The other girl awkwardly watched as Razz led Adora inside the house and just stood outside, “Uh- I’ll let you two talk alone, I’ll just wait out here.”

The woman turned around and reached out her hand towards the brunette, “Don’t be silly! You’re Adora’s friend aren’t you, any friend of Adora’s is welcome.”

Catra tilted her head and rubbed her hands together since it was  _ so _ damn cold outside, “But-”

Razz placed her frail hand in Catra’s and tugged on it, “No buts. I insist dearie.”

The girl peered into the house and felt the heat radiating inside of the house. She looked behind her at the fallen snow and sighed, well there was no way she’s going to be staying outside in the snow forever. So why the hell not? 

She nodded and accepted the invitation.

  
  
  


Adora and Catra sat in the living room in silence as they waited for Razz to come out from the kitchen. The blonde closed her eyes as she took deep breaths and Catra placed her hand on top of Adora’s, “Hey… you okay?” 

The girl smiled thankfully at her and nodded, “Yeah… things are going well so far. I mean she’s not mad at me,” she nervously laughed. 

Catra smiled and caressed Adora’s hand with her thumb, “Adora I-”

“Here we are dearies,” Razz said, walking over to the couch holding a plate of tea, “Tea for all of you! I have some pie baking in the oven right now too, made out of leftover dough and pie filling. We will feast once it finishes baking. I would have made it earlier if Adora told me you two were coming,” Adora blushed in embarrassment and looked away from the woman, “But never mind that, go on drink some tea! I grew them myself.”

The brunette smiled and sipped her tea cup, “Thank you ma’am.”

Razz laughed, “Just call me Razz dearie,” Catra nodded and felt her heart flutter. She didn’t know that an old woman calling her “dearie,” would make her so happy. The woman sat down on the couch and sighed, “It’s nice to see you again Adora, I missed you greatly.”

“I know Razz,” she said softly, “I’m-”

“Don’t bother apologizing again dearie,” Razz chuckled, “I already know.” 

Adora nodded, “It’s all because of that DVD that made us argue,” Razz hummed as she sipped her cup of tea, “So… I’ve been thinking, I want to see what Mara has left for us.”

Catra pursed her lip and stood up, “I… Adora I think I’m going to head to your room. Which one is it?”

The blonde looked at her friend in shock, “Uh… go down the hall and it’s the second one on the right, why?”

“I don’t want to intrude on your private conversation about your sister, so I’ll just leave you two alone,” before Adora could argue with Catra, the girl quickly picked up the suitcases that they had brung with them and hastily exited the living room. 

Razz watched as Catra left and leaned forward, “Are you sure dearie?”

The girl nodded, “Positive. Though I don’t really like talking about Mara, I want to know what happened and I want know if that dumb DVD was worth me arguing about.”

“Very well,” Razz slowly stood up from the couch, “Stay here dearie, I’m going to go get the DVD in my room,” Adora nodded and slumped on the couch as she waited for Razz to come back out.

Adora sighed and thought to herself,  _ I have so many questions Mara. What are you hiding? What did you want to show me and Razz that is so important that you couldn’t come and tell us yourself? Why did you leave me? Why did you break our promise? Are you even going to be coming back? Do you- _

Her thoughts were interrupted when Razz came out of her room, holding the DVD in her left hand, “Found it!” Adora smiled at the old woman as she walked over to the TV and placed the DVD in the slot. The woman walked over to Adora and sat next to her on the couch as they focused their attention on the TV.

On the edge on her seat, Adora watched the static on the TV for a couple of seconds and suddenly she saw Mara’s face on the screen. The girl blinked at the image of her sister. To be honest, it’s been so long since she’s seen her sister, she even forgot how she looked sometimes. Adora peered at the TV, she looked… strange? Mara was paler than usual and she had an oxygen tube coming out of her nose. Was she in the hospital?

Mara coughed,  _ “Razz… ‘Dora. By the time you’re watching this video, I’m afraid I’m already dead,”  _ the girl said softly,  _ “Let me start from the beginning. A year ago,” _ she started to cough,  _ “I had my annual check up at the doctors and I found out that I had cancer. But Hope wanted me to keep it a secret, even from you ‘Dora, because she didn’t want to spend money on me to go through chemotherapy, since she thought I was strong enough to eventually overcome it.” _

_ “But as more and more time passed and my condition got worse, I gave up asking Hope to take me to the hospital, since I knew that she would never let me. After I legally adopted you, I worked hard at the diner to get some money so I could get the treatment that I needed. But the money I was earning was barely enough for me to take care of you, let alone go through chemotherapy. Eventually my body just couldn’t work anymore so that’s why I dropped you off at Razz’s,”  _ Adora clasped her hand over her mouth and silently cried as she listened to the words that came out of Mara’s mouth. 

The girl laughed bitterly and smiled at the camera,  _ “I didn’t know how to tell you because I knew that I was going to die eventually and I didn’t want you to see me like this. Since, you’re always talking about how you looked up to me and I didn’t want to let you down,”  _ Tears came out of Mara’s eyes and her voice cracked as she spoke,  _ “But I supposed I already let you down since… I broke our promise. I’m so sorry, ‘Dora. I’m so sorry Razz.” _

There was talking in the background of the video, that Adora couldn’t make out, but she saw Mara looked up behind the camera and nodded to whoever was talking,  _ “I only have a little bit of time to talk now since they want to run a bit more tests on me. But Adora, my sweet, sweet baby sister. I know you, you want to help people and be a useful person to others. But please, take care of yourself too okay? Since, you are worth more than what you can give to others. You deserve love too!”  _

Adora clenched her teeth and Razz placed a hand on top of it to calm herself down a bit as the girl cried.

_ “Razz… thank you so much, for everything. The delicious mac n’ cheese you would give me on the busy days in the diner, how you would always make me laugh when I’m stressed, for being like a mother to me and Adora even though we’ve never met ours. And thank you so much for taking care of Adora for me. I love you. I love both of you very much. And I’m sorry, for everything. Please, don’t be sad that I’ll be leaving this world, since I’ll always be watching over the both of you and soon, we’ll reunite again. I just know it! Goodbye, I love you both.” _

The video turned back to static and Adora and Razz were left on the couch, sitting in silence. They turned to each other and started to cry uncontrollably. Adora looked at the static in the TV and bit her lip, “She… she just wanted what was best for me, even though it wasn’t the right way, she meant well,” The blonde uttered, “And I resented her for it.”

Razz laughed through her tears, “She was brave my Mara.”

Adora shakily stood up from the couch, “I’m… going to go back to my room… I’ll see you in the morning. Goodnight Razz,” the girl leaned down and hugged the woman before she went back in her room.

She opened the door to her room and saw Catra sitting on her floor, unpacking their belongings. The brunette looked up at her and saw Adora’s red, tear stained face. “W-woah!” She ran up to her friend and hugged her, “Adora are you okay? What the hell did you guys watch?”

“The truth,” Adora said, burying her face in Catra’s neck, “I learned about everything. And it turns out it was Mara being Mara. She just wanted what was best for me. But she hid things from me! She left both Razz and I in the dark and I don’t know what to feel to be honest… I know she meant well but still… it’s kinda hard to understand.”

Catra ran her fingers through Adora’s hair to comfort her friend, “That’s okay… it must be a lot to process right now. Just rest for now okay…?”

The blonde sniffled, “Okay.”

  
  
  


Razz hummed as she took a freshly baked pie out of the oven, and wrapped the hot pan sheet in cloth. The woman walked over to the TV and placed the pie in front of it. She smiled and wiped her own tears away.

“For you, Mara, dearie.”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> UGHHHH OMG I TOTALLY DID NOT CRY WRITING AND EDITING THIS. so this chapter was SOMETHING we found out that mara had cancer but didnt want to let adora see her in like that condition bc she knows that adora looks up to her a lot BUT UGH MARA WHY!! yes ofc i let mara die she died in like 2 other of my stories (this one included) the only one where she's actually alive is like my hs au but NEVER MIND THAT bro but real talk, writing mara's DVD thing made me so sad like omg im a pretty sensitive person when it comes to that so idk if you guys are like sad about the dvd thing i mean i hope so bc you guys were generally curious on that was in the DVD so like i hope you guys liked that scene haha if not that's kinda awkward and disappointing for you BUT ANYWAYS i had a lot of fun writing this chapter it was really something to me i hope you guys enjoyed it as much as i did lmfao anyways yeah feel free to leave a comment down below and hope you guys have a good morning/afternoon/evening! :)


	12. how could i not fall for you when you look at me like that?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> adora and catra stays at razz's for the holidays

It’s been a week since the two girls have been staying with Razz back in Adora’s hometown. Ever since the night where Adora and Razz watched the DVD and learned the truth, the blonde would always think about Mara and why she did what she did. First she was angry, then she was disgusted at herself for being angry for all those years, since Mara was just looking out for her, and now, she understood.

“Y’know I get what Mara wanted for me,” Adora said as she and Catra trudged through the snow on their walk around the neighborhood, “She might not have used the best method to project me, but I understand her intentions.”

Hands buried in her warm pockets, Catra nodded, “So… you’re not mad at her anymore?”

Adora shook her head, “Well, I still have a bit of mixed feelings about everything, but no not really. Mara… she had good intentions, I would have liked her to have told me about her illness when I was a kid, but I don’t think I would have really understood it when I was younger.”

The brunette nodded and looked at the ground as she walked, “That’s… nice.”

“You okay?” Adora asked, looking at Catra with compassion in her eyes.

The other girl nodded and laughed, “Why wouldn’t I be? I’m glad that you know the truth about Mara and that you’re taking this so... _ well _ ,” Catra said, her voice getting softer at the end of the sentence. The girl groaned softly and rubbed her lower back in pain.

Noticing that small detail, Adora opened her mouth to say something but was rudely interrupted by a phone notification. She took her phone out of her pocket and checked a message, it was from Razz. “We should head back now. Razz said the pie is done already.”

Kicking the snow, Catra scoffed playfully, “We like had pie everyday since we’ve gotten here. Are you not tired of it?” 

The blonde laughed, “I’ve lived with Razz since I was 12, I’ve gotten used to eating pie multiple times a week. Plus, her pie is great, there was a reason why her bakery was super popular before she retired.”

The two girls talked and laughed on the way back home, but to be honest, Catra was faking most of the time. 

  
  
  


As she brushed her teeth, Catra rubbed her back again, it wasn’t comfortable to sleep on the floor at night. There was a knock on the doorframe and Adora walked in, “Hey Catra, wanna finish the third season of  _ Legend of Korra _ tonight? There’s like 5 more episodes left, so that’s like around 2 and a half hours.” 

Catra hummed and after she finished brushing her teeth, she splashed cold water on her face, while Adora looked at Catra’s hunched over back, “Yeah sure, we can even go start season 4 if you want too,” she said.

“Maybe, if I’m not tired,” Adora laughed, “I’ll see you in my room,” she said, before she left her friend’s sight.

The girl looked at her reflection in the mirror and groaned, “Ugh… it’s not  _ her _ fault, so why am I so irritated?” Catra sighed, “I should be happy that she’s can took the truth about her sister, so why am I not happy for her?” She then dried her face with a towel, “This is so stupid, I’m fine.”

The brunette walked into Adora’s room and saw her sitting on her bed with her laptop propped open, “Come on,” the girl said, patting a spot next to her on the bed, “I’m gonna start it.” Without exchanging any words with Adora, Catra crawled to the spot where Adora wanted her to sit and silently watched  _ Legend of Korra _ together. 

During one of the episodes, Catra hugged her knees and smiled, “Damn, Korra is so fucking hot, I mean do you  _ see _ her arms? Also I’m pretty sure there’s something between her and Asami, I mean I can feel the sexual tension between the two. Or maybe I’m just imagining it because I’m gay.” 

Ignoring the second part, Adora blinked at the screen and saw the image of Korra flexing her muscles while earth bending, “So… you’re into buff girls?”

“Mm… you can say that,” Catra laughed, “They have a special place in my heart,” the girl said, keeping her eyes fixed on the laptop screen with Korra on it, “Why?” she asked, turning her head to Adora.

The blonde blushed and laughed nervously, “N-no reason,” she stuttered. When Catra shrugged and turned her head away from her, Adora looked down at her arm and silently flexed it. She then turned her head back to the screen and frowned,  _ Korra’s got nothing on me…  _ Adora thought.

After finishing the third season of  _ Legend of Korra,  _ and starting the fourth one, it was already 12 am in the morning. Catra yawned and stretched her arms, “I think we should call it a day, I’m pooped.”

Adora closed her laptop and saw Catra getting down from her bed and going to sleep on the futon that was on the floor. “W-wait!” Adora said suddenly. Catra turned around and raised an eyebrow at her, “U-uh… I noticed that you’ve been having back problems so uh… do you want to take the bed for the night?”

Eyeing the bed, Catra shrugged and nodded, “Why not, I feel like an 80 year old grandma,” she then lied on the bed and sighed, but out of the corner of her eye, she saw Adora getting up to sleep on the floor. Sitting up quickly, Catra crossed her arm, “What the hell are you doing?”

“Uh… taking the floor?” Adora said awkwardly.

“Don’t be stupid Adora,” Catra said harshly, “Just sleep here, the bed is huge.”

Adora was thankful that the room was pitch black, so Catra couldn’t see her transform into a tomato with how furious she’s blushing, “U-uh you sure?” Without saying anything, Catra just lifted up the covers and Adora took that as an invitation. Hestitanly, she crawled under the covers and was facing Catra, the girl’s mesmerizing mismatched eyes practically glowing in the dark.

The brunette drew an invisible line on the bed, “This is a line okay? If you cross it, I’ll kill you,” the other girl gulped and nodded, “I’m a kicker by the way,” Catra said slyly.

Though Catra was strict about crossing the invisible line on the bed, ironically she was the one who crossed it and embraced the heat that radiated off of the blonde’s body as she slept peacefully in Adora’s arms.

  
  


Waking up in Adora’s arms surprised Catra greatly, but she would be lying if she said she minded it. The girl looked at the alarm clock on the drawer next to Adora’s bed, it was 6 am. Why the fuck was she up so early? But it’s not like she could fall asleep again, so Catra carefully got out of bed without waking up Adora who was still deep in sleep, and began her day.

After doing her personal hygiene routine, the girl walked out into the kitchen where she saw Razz sipping a small cup of tea. “Good morning Razz,” Catra said.

“Good morning dearie,” the old woman smiled, “Care for a cup of tea?”

She shook her head and softly shook a pack of instant coffee, “No thank you, I’m all set,” the kitchen was silent as Catra was pouring hot water into her instant coffee. She sat down on the stool across from Razz and sipped it.

The old woman smiled, “You drink it black? I’m impressed.”

“I have a sweet tooth, but  _ not _ for coffee,” Catra laughed, “I prefer it just black and bitter, perfect way to start off the day,” she added quietly.

Razz nodded and placed down her cup on the counter, “Adora doesn’t really like bitter things, she has such a sweet tooth. I suppose that’s why she’s so sweet and understanding,” Catra bit her lip and silently continued to drink her coffee.

The girl looked at Razz, “Yeah… I’m kinda envious how understanding she is actually. It’s only been a couple of days since she’s watched the DVD and I just don’t understand how she just dealt with it so easily. It’s like…” she looked down at her hands, “all the wounds she had already healed. I just can’t understand because it’s been  _ years _ for me and I’m just left with all of these scars but… I can’t seem to move past them.”

Catra looked up at the old woman who just stared silently at her. She blushed in embarrassment, “Sorry… I over shared there a bit.” 

“No shame in that dearie,” Razz said, “But you should know scars heal.”

The brunette shook her head and let out a short, bitter laugh, “You’ve got it wrong, scars don’t heal.  _ Wounds _ heal.”

“Scars  _ fade _ ,” Razz smiled, “you just have to let go of the memories from the past that caused it,” Catra listened as she looked down at her hands, “The only thing that matters is what you choose to be now. Adora chose to let go of the past and understood what Mara wanted for her. I don’t know what happened to you before, maybe you can’t forgive like how Adora forgave Mara. But all I know is that you have to choose what you want for yourself, no one else can do that but you.”

Catra nodded and drank what’s left of her coffee, “I can try.”

Razz looked up at Catra lovingly, “That’s the first step to healing dearie.”

“No promises…” the girl uttered, rubbing the back of her neck. She took a deep breath, “But, thank you, I really needed that,” Catra smiled.

The old woman adjusted her glasses, “Of course dearie. You know, I’m happy that Adora has found you, you two complement each other so well. The perfect couple if I must say so myself!” 

The girl turned a scarlet red and shook her head, “Y-you’ve got it wrong Razz! I-  _ We’re _ just friends! Nothing else!” 

Squinting at Catra, Razz frowned, “I don’t have my glasses, you have to speak up louder.”

Catra furrowed her eyebrows, “I-”

“You may say that you’re friends  _ now _ but, try to tell me that again in a couple of months,” she smiled mischievously at Catra who was looking at her with a mix of confusion and surprise, “I’ve seen the way she looks at you and how you look at her. Adora  _ means _ something to you.”

The brunette barked out a short laugh, “W-well yeah! We’re like best friends!” 

Razz rested her chin on her hand, “She means something  _ more _ to you then just friends though, am I right?” 

Laughing nervously, Catra pointed at her watch and smiled awkwardly, “L-look at the time! I should probably shower now! Uh- thank you for the advice!” Catra stuttered before she ran down the hallway and into the bathroom.

Shaking her head and smiling, Razz sipped her cup, “Can’t even acknowledge your own feelings. Kids these days.”

  
  
  


After celebrating Christmas and New Years, with Razz, Adora and Catra were already on their train back to BMU. Looking out of the window, Adora smiled at how peaceful the scenery looked like with the snow falling. Catra rested her head on Adora’s shoulder, “I’m so happy we still have a week left of break before a new semester starts. Not like the other schools where they only have like 2 weeks off. BMU has like 4 weeks off baby!” Catra grinned.

The blonde smiled, “Yeah, back in community college, we only had 2 weeks off and we had finals  _ after _ our break too.”

“What kind of bullshit is that,” Catra said, rolling her eyes, “Hey, I don’t think I ever asked you. You’re like really smart, why’d you go to community college? N-not that there’s anything against it-”

Adora laughed, “You’re fine, but I went to community college for two years because Razz and I didn’t have enough money for me to go directly into BMU. But I don’t really mind, community college was pretty boring but it was a money saver.”

Lifting her head from Adora’s shoulder, Catra peered out of the train’s window, “Finally, we’re almost here. I didn’t know I would miss my cramped dorm room so fucking much, but here the fuck we are.” 

30 minutes passed and the train went to a stop and the train’s radio came on. 

_ Please keep the walk way clear for departure. Ladies, gentlemen, and enbies, we have arrived at Brightmoon’s Train Station.  _

  
  
  


Parked in BMU’s student parking lot, Catra and Adora took out their luggage and were walking in the direction of the dorm rooms. Catra breathed in the air and smiled, “I didn’t know I liked this dumb college so much until I left for 3 weeks.”

Humming as they walked, Adora looked at her phone, “I think Glimmer and Bow should be back too! Ah, I can’t wait to see them.”

Catra smiled at how happy Adora looked and Razz’s words echoed in her head, 

_ She means something more to you then just friends though, am I right? _

The girl shook the thoughts out of her head and saw Adora pointing in the distance, “Holy shit! That’s them! Glimmer! Bow!” 

Looking at where Adora was pointing, Catra saw her friends along with someone she’s never seen before, “Who the fuck is that…?” she murmured to herself. 

“Come on Catra! Let’s go greet them!” Adora grinned. 

“You sure? Glimmer’s not a big fan of me blondie,” she looked at Adora who was giving her puppy eyes and the brunette rolled her eyes, “Fine,” she grumbled. There was no way she could say no to that face.

The two girls walked over to Bow and Glimmer who was with another girl who had long hazelnut hair and gorgeous emerald green eyes. The mystery girl was wearing loose mom jeans and a collared brown sweater and was also accessorized with many golden necklaces.

Adora hugged her two friends while Catra kept a distance between them, “Hey guys I missed you so much!” the blonde smiled, “How have you been?”

Glimmer glanced at Catra who was standing awkwardly behind Adora, but surprisingly, for once, Glimmer didn’t glare at her. “Oh y’know it’s whatever, opening presents on Christmas and watching the countdown,” she gestured at the green eyed girl, “Oh and guess what! We have a new student this semester and Bow and I were just showing her around campus,” she nudged Adora, “Like what we did for you back then!”

Bow nodded and smiled, “Yeah this is-”

“I’m Erin,” the girl said, smiling brightly at Adora. Catra looked at Erin from behind, for some reason, something was off about the new girl and Catra did not like the vibe she was radiating.

The blonde smiled at the girl, “Cool I’m-”

“Adora right?” Erin smiled, walking forward and clasping Adora’s hand in hers, “Bow and Glimmer has told me  _ so _ much about you! It’s nice to finally meet a fellow transfer student in BMU.”

Catra looked at how Adora’s cheeks turned a light pink when Erin touched her. The brunette grit her teeth and squinted at how Erin was caressing Adora’s hand in hers. 

  
Okay, Catra  _ really _ did  _ not _ like this girl.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ooh love rival for catra that's some hot tea. yes i did make an original character just to stir up some drama what are you going to do about it. lmao jkjk but its not a total lie that i wanted to make drama between catra and adora sooo... yuh ANYWAYS catra talking to razz was kinda sweet, at least for me and yes that scene was inspired off of a kung fu panda scene (i forgot which movie tho sorryyyy) anyways yeah at least for me, its just weird seeing out people can just move on with their problems so easily (or it seems that way) while like i'm still so fucked up yknow what i mean? i hope that relatable to some of you guys. well anyways catra is going to work that out eventually but RIGHT NOW HER NEXT PROBLEM IS SOME RANDOM beATCh (that i created lol) TRYNA STEAL HER GIRL LIKE YOU CANT FUCKING DO THAT erIn (yes, the hazelnut hair and the green eyes YES erin is basically the girl version of erEh from attack on tita, at least appearance wise, leave me alone its my favorite anime and season 4 is great GO WATCH IT IT HAS A WLW COUPLE AND ITS GREAT) anyways back to business SHE CANT FUCKING STEAL ADORA AWAY FROM CATRA ESPECIALLY IF ADORA'S MOTHER FIGURE ALREADY SHIPS THEM TOGETHER LIKE FUCK YOU anyways hope you guys enjoyed this chapter feel free to leave a comment down below and im really sorry for putting yall in the feels but whats done is done lol anyways hope yall have a good morning/afternoon/evening! :)


	13. rivals

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> catra is afraid that a certain girl is drifting her and adora apart

It’s been a day since that Erin girl has come to BMU, and Catra never wanted to slap a person so badly before. Wherever she and Adora went, Erin went. Was it too much to ask to hang out with her friend without a parasite breathing down her neck?

Tapping her fingers on the library desk, underneath her hat, Catra glared at Erin and Adora who was sitting across the table.  _ Look at her,  _ Catra thought,  _ Being all friendly with Adora. I can’t believe Adora is letting her touch her like that! I don’t even really touch Adora like that!  _ A realization hit Catra and she looked down at her sketching book,  _ Am I… jealous? Ugh, why am I even jealous for fucks sake? It’s not like I own Adora or anything, I don’t keep her on a leash. _

Catra looked across the table and saw Erin being all cozy with Adora. “You’re a sport’s medicine major,  _ wow _ ,” the girl smiled, “Maybe if I get injured you can practice on me, how does that sound Adora?” She cooed.

The blonde looked over at Catra, who immediately looked away, and laughed nervously, “M-maybe… though I think you should see a PT major instead of just a sports medicine major,” she smiled.

The brunette laughed inside of her head when she saw Erin’s flabbergasted face when Adora gave out the stupidest response ever. But, Catra was glad that Adora’s brain was slow at this moment, who knows how more irritated Catra would get if the girl flirted back with Erin. The girl shook her head, she shouldn’t think like that. Catra trusted Adora, there’s  _ no _ way that Adora liked Erin right? Especially if she was there. Erin got nothing on her. 

Standing up, Adora held her textbook close to her chest, “Well I think I’m going to go back home now, Catra wanna come with me?”

Packing up her bags, Catra nodded, “Yeah let’s get outta here.”

Erin looked up at Adora who was smiling at Catra, “Uh, I can come with you if you want.”

Irritated, Catra glared at Erin, “I’d rather you not. Aren’t you tired of tagging along with Adora and I? Just go home,” she said in a dominant tone. Catra saw the girl hang her head and she was satisfied by how she politely told Erin to fuck off. The brunette walked over to Adora, “Come on, there’s something I wanna tell you anyways, princess.”

Adora blinked, “Sure.”

The two girls walked out of the library and towards the direction of the dorms. Catra walked over to a bench and just sat on it, patting the spot next to her for Adora to sit with her. Nervously sitting down next to her, Catra grit her teeth, “Why the fuck are you hanging out with Erin? There’s something off about her, I can’t stand her too. She’s always touching you and just following us wherever we go, I can’t fucking stand her!” the girl repeated.

“What? Erin is nice, what are you talking about? Plus we have similar majors so she helps me study,” Adora said, crossing her arms.

Catra scoffed, “I thought you said you just wanted someone to sit with you when you study.”

The blonde sighed, “Yeah, that’s what I said, but it’s also nice to have someone to help me study. Studying with you  _ does _ boost my grade, but having someone that has a similar major as me also helps me.”

The other girl bit her lip, “She’s  _ always _ flirting with you!”

Adora let out a short laugh, “Catra, she’s just nice okay? She’s nice to Glimmer and Bow like that too. I don’t understand what you’re trying to say.”

“She doesn’t fucking even hang out with Sparkles and Bow a lot, even when she does, she’s so quiet around them! Like a total fucking different person.” 

“C-”

Catra stood up abruptly, cutting off Adora and glared at her friend, “She’s only nice to you because she wants to fuck you!”

Groaning into her hands, Adora then sighed and looked up at Catra, “Okay, there’s  _ obviously _ some type of rift between you and Erin. How about this, tomorrow I’ll arrange something and we’ll all have lunch together, me, you, and Erin. Then you’ll see she’s not all bad! Trust me, it’ll be great!” The girl grinned.

Catra let out a loud groan, “It’s going to be  _ shit _ .”

  
  
  


And it was. 

Sitting in a local diner, Catra sat from across Adora and Erin. Because of  _ course _ that piece of shit wanted to sit next to fucking Adora. The brunette watched bitterly as Erin’s arm was wrapped around Adora’s.  _ My fucking god,  _ Catra thought,  _ why did I fucking agree to this?  _ Suddenly, she pictured Adora’s wide grin in her mind,  _ Oh right, that’s why. _

The blonde scratched her hair and slightly pushed Erin away, “It’s hot,” she said quietly. 

“Why don’t you talk off your jacket then?” Erin suggested.

_ Oh this fucking bitch,  _ Catra thought,  _ Adora you better fucking not take off your jacket and show your fucking hot muscles. Especially to that bitch, there’s no way I’m going to be sitting through this girl thirst over you more, because only I should be thirsting over you! _

Laughing nervously, Adora shook her head, “Nah, I’m good,” she said, giving a quick glance to Catra. The brunette let out a sigh of relief, “Let’s just order now, I’m sure you guys are hungry.”

The girl handed a menu over to Catra and the brunette scanned through it. She decided she’ll just get some waffle fries, she didn’t feel like eating a lot. After ordering their food, Catra getting some fries, Adora ordering a classic burger, and fucking Erin ordering the same thing as Adora, the three girls were sitting on the table in the most awkward silence in history.

“So where did you transfer from?” Adora asked Erin.

“Thulite Community College,” Erin smiled, “How about you?”

“Eternia Community College,” Adora laughed. 

Catra sighed and just got on her phone as she tuned out the other girl’s conversation.  _ Can’t fucking belive this,  _ Catra thought,  _ She wanted me to get to know that bitch but she can’t fucking stop flirting with you. Why can’t you see that Adora? Why can’t you see me? _

Nothing different happened when their food came out. Erin and Adora kept talking with each other while Catra just watched from the sidelines. The girl poked her waffle fries and sighed, how long was this torture going to last?

Adora looked over at Catra, who was  _ clearly _ not having a good time, “Hey, y’know Catra is really talented with music and the arts. The first time we actually talked, I walked in on her singing on the rooftops.” 

The brunette blushed in embarrassment, “W-we don’t talk about that,” she laughed nervously. 

Erin grinned and rested her chin on her hand, “That’s cool. How’s it like being a music and art major? There can’t be a lot of opportunities for you in the future though can it? Why would you pick that major?” Catra grit her teeth,  _ What did she just say?  _ She thought, “But I guess according to Adora you’re really talented so I suppose you have a higher chance to be able to find a job in your major in the future. Unlike all of the other people in your department,” the girl let out the fakest laugh Catra has ever heard while Adora just laughed awkwardly with her, nodding her head in agreement in what Erin just said.

_ What kind of fucking backhand compliment is that? _ Catra thought,  _ And why the fuck is Adora agreeing with her? Ugh, nevermind Adora is too dense to know what that piece of shit actually means. _ Catra just let out a wry laugh and just focused her attention back to her dear waffle fries. 

“Catra  _ really _ is talented though,” Adora said, giving the brunette a soft smile, “I’ve heard her and I fell in love with her voice, it’s… it’s really something.”

Blushing furiously, Catra shielded her face with her hat and muttered a thanks. _ Holy shit, holy fucking shit,  _ she thought,  _ she fell in love with my voice? Does that mean- well Razz does think we are a couple… So does that mean,  _ Catra looked up at Adora and the two girls met eyes,  _ she wants me like I want her?  _

Erin raised an eyebrow at the two and nudged Adora’s shoulder, “Hey you know, I used to be in a small acting troupe back in community college. It was really fun, I had the lead role and everything too, one time even one of our shows got sold out and I- I mean  _ we _ , had a standing ovation.” The brunette looked at the girl with disgust,  _ Are you shitting me?  _

Adora looked at the emerald eyed girl with surprise, “Wow! That’s really cool actually! I can’t act for my life,” she laughed, “When I was a kid I would always act for a role in my school plays but the director said that I was terrible, so I was always a narrator instead.”

“That director is wrong!” Erin said suddenly, “You’re amazing!”

Catra blinked, “Oh boy,” she said under her breath.

The blonde’s cheek turned a light pink at the compliment and she laughed, “Thanks… no one really ever told me that before,” Catra looked down at her hands and bit her lip, “So thanks for that.”

Erin smiled, “Just saying the truth.”

After talking a bit more, well, Adora and Erin were talking, Catra was just being left out again. They all paid for their meals separately and Adora got up and stretched her arms, “Well, this was fun, I think I’m going to head back to my dorm now.”

Catra looked up at her, “I can-”

“Hey I can walk you back to your dorm,” Erin suggested, “I’m going in that direction anyways.”

Adora smiled and nodded, “Yeah okay,” she looked down at Catra and waved, “I’ll see you later Catra.”

Before the brunette could say anything, Adora and Erin were walking away from the table, leaving Catra alone. Catra stared at how their backs disappeared and saw how Erin’s arm was wrapped around Adora’s again. The brunette spoke quietly to herself, “That should be  _ me _ .”

  
  
  


There were only a couple more days before break and today was Catra and Adora’s weekly Cartoon Night. They still had to finish,  _ Legend of Korra _ since they only had a couple of episodes left anyways. Whistling to herself, Catra waited for Adora to come over to her dorm so they could finish their show together. “Where  _ is _ she?” Catra asked herself, “Whatever, I’ll just clean up a bit before she came here.”

She went over to her phone and played, “La La Lost You,” by NIKI on her Spotify playlist as the girl tidied up her room a bit. 30 minutes and 11 songs later, Adora  _ still _ wasn’t here.

“What the fuck,” Catra went over to her phone, “Adora loves Cartoon Night and she’s always on time, maybe even earlier,” she went over and texted the girl.

Catra: where the fuck are you its fucking cartoon night dont you wanna finish lok? 

Another 30 minutes passed and Adora didn’t show up or reply to Catra’s text. The girl rolled her eyes, “Fuck is it at her place tonight and I just forgot?” Catra sighed and packed up her bags with her laptop along with a couple of snacks and went to the direction of Adora’s dorm room.

Speed walking towards the Adora’s dorm building, Catra huffed, “When I see her I’m going to give her a piece of my fucking mind. This fucking day is the last day to watch our fucking cartoons since next week is the start of a new fucking semester and I need to prepare my shit. I’m going to shit myself if she forgot.”

Walking up the stairs in the building, Catra turned the corner and started to bang on Adora’s door, “Adora you better fucking get out of here right fucking now or I’ll fucking kick down your door!” 

There was no reply on the other side.

Irritated, Catra rolled up her sleeves and just started to bang harder. Thoughts invaded her mind as she kept pounding on the door,  _ Is Erin there? Did she forget about me? Did she drop me? Am I… being replaced again? _

The thoughts were too much for Catra so she just leaned against the door and bit her lip hard enough for her skin to break. Suddenly, the door opened and since Catra was leaning against it, she fell forward. “Son of a  _ bitch _ ,” Catra said, rubbing her now bruised elbow.

“ _ Catra _ ?” 

The girl looked up and her eyes widened, “You’ve got to be shitting me.

  
It’s  _ you _ .”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter was something LOL im sorry for making you guys so pissed up at a character and maybe even adora's actions like COME ON ADORA CATRA IS RIGHT THERE!!! lowkey when i was writing this chapter i was like "how can i make my readers pissed off at a character?" and thus this chapter was created. anyways catra is just trying her best to get adora's attention but it seems so hopeless for her poor baby. anyways yeah i wonder who found catra at the end though i mean she's at ADORA'S ROOM so there's only really three possibilities 2 being more likely than others, either erin or glimmer because i'm sure catra wouldn't be like "oh You've GoT TO Be SHiTTiN ME iT'S YoU" to adora bc we know how catra is a fucking simp for the dumb blonde lol. okay but tbh one line that im lowkey proud of is when catra was like "why can't you see me" ahhhhh that got me into the feels idk about yall tho lol OOH btw there's a really small detail to foreshadowing lmk if you guys caught it haha anyways hope you guys enjoyed this chapter and im sorry for making a character so annoying but that's her fucking job okay im SORRY anyways feel free to leave a comment down below about your opinions on today's chapter and i hope you all have a good morning/afternoon/evening :)


	14. an unlikely duo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> catra has a little talk with glimmer

“You’ve got to be shitting me,” Catra said, looking up, “It’s  _ you _ .”

There was a scoff, “Well what did you expect smartass, I fucking live here.” Catra got off of the floor and brushed the dust off of her clothes and stared at Glimmer, who was leaning against the doorway, “Geez, I was just trying to go to use my bathroom and all of the sudden I hear fucking banging on the door. What are you even doing here anyways?”

Catra groaned, “I was looking for Adora, but of  _ course _ with my luck you’re the one who opens the door for me,” Glimmer rolled her eyes while Catra just crossed her arms, “Where’s Adora anyways? We have a fucking schedule where we watch cartoons for childrens 7 years old and up.”

The cotton candy girl shrugged, “Must have forgotten then. She’s off with Erin or something, studying and getting dinner or some bullshit like that.”

A cackle rang through the hallways and Glimmer looked at Catra at surprise, she was  _ definitely _ not expecting that reaction from her. The brunette stopped her maniacal laughter and let out a sigh, “Thanks Sparkles, I’ll just head back now,” she said in a very delicate tone.

“Wait,” Glimmer reached out a hand and touched Catra’s shoulder, but the girl immediately flinched at the physical touch, “Sorry…” she looked at Catra who had one eyebrow raised, “Uh… you’re already here so uh, why don’t you come in and we can talk a bit?”

Looking down at her phone, which still had no reply from Adora, Catra shrugged, “Fuck it, why not.”

Glimmer moved out of the way and let Catra in who just sat on the floor next to Adora’s bed, hugging her bag close to her chest. The two girls sat in a suffocating awkward silence, until Catra spoke up, “Why’s Adora hanging out with that bitch Erin anyways?” Glimmer looked up at the brunette who continued ranting, “I mean, she’s  _ obviously _ just trying to get in Adora’s pants, why is she so fucking oblivious?”

The other girl laughed, “I mean, Adora is always the one who wants to befriend everyone no matter what. I mean I told her to stay away from you and now look at you two, you guys are like really close now right?”

Catra shrugged, “Used to, now Erin is probably going to take my place,” the girl laughed and looked up at Glimmer, “Now I know how you felt when you told Adora to stay away from me.”

“Huh, I guess you’re right.”

“Maybe we aren’t so different after all,” Catra muttered under her breath.

Hearing what Catra had said, Glimmer laid down on her bed and looked at Catra, “Yeah… maybe you’re right,” the girl took a deep breath and quickly sat up, “Look Catra… I’m sorry for being so awful to you. I just- I didn’t even know you but I ostracized you because of the things that happened in the past. I’m sorry for being a bitch, it wasn’t cool. I should have given you a chance, but I just ignored the possibilities of you changing into a better person. Again, I’m sorry. You don’t have to forgive me.”

The brunette laughed, “I mean, I don’t blame you, I was a shitty person back then, especially to my- uh,  _ your _ friends, Scorpia and Entrapta. But,” Catra leaned her head back onto Adora’s bed and clutched her bag tighter, “I like to think that I  _ have _ changed since then.” 

“That’s good to hear,” Glimmer smiled, “Y’know you’re pretty chill actually, I thought you would be some kinda rude delinquent.”

She shrugged, “I mean I am, depends who I talk to I guess.” After another long silence, Catra sighed, “Fuck it’s happening again,” she mumbled, placing her hand over her face.

“What is?”

Glimmer looked at Catra and saw a tear run down her cheek. Catra laughed dryly, “Me being replaced. I mean, when Scorpia and Entrapta left me and got new friends, I can understand that since I was being stupid  _ and _ a bitch. But with Adora? I- I don’t understand,” Glimmer heard Catra’s voice crack, “We used to have a whole thing, we would text, call, hang out with just the two of us, have these stupid Cartoon Nights that she loves so much. But now? It’s all falling apart, we barely do things together and if we do manage to find time to hang out, we’re not alone. It’s all because of  _ her _ . And I- I don’t know what to do, it's just too much, I don’t want to be left again,  _ especially _ if it’s by Adora.”

The cotton candy haired girl got off her bed and kneeled in front of Catra, “Hey, hey it’s okay. Adora is  _ not _ going to leave you okay? I know her, she would never do that to anyone.  _ Especially _ if it’s you!” 

Moving her hand out of her face, Catra looked at Glimmer, “What do you mean if it’s me?”

Glimmer rolled her eyes, “Damn, you talk shit about how Adora is oblivious but you’re an oblivious piece of shit too,” Offended, Catra glared at Glimmer who laughed at her face, “Anyways, Adora is like  _ totally _ into you. I mean have you  _ seen _ the way she looks at you?”

_ Again with the “how Adora looks at me,”  _ Catra thought,  _ I mean… if Razz, a wise old lady, well I guess she’s wise. Old people should be wise right? Never mind that, but if Glimmer also is reminding me how Adora looks at me, maybe it’s actually true? But… Glimmer is kinda stupid and also a piece of shit, but Razz is wise, so I guess they cancel each other out. Ugh this is so stupid and confusing! _

Catra crossed her arms, “No, I  _ don’t _ see the way she’s looking at me because nowadays she’s always looking at Erin! Which fucking pisses me off!” She looked over at Glimmer who was giving her a shiteating grin, “What?”

“You like her huh?” Glimmer grinned.

Blushing furiously, Catra stumbled through her words, “W-what? I mean, uh, I don’t know? Ugh! I-it’s uh, it’s complicated.” There was no way she was exposing her feelings to Glimmer.

“I see… I won’t pry, but if you like her, which you  _ probably _ do,” Catra rolled her eyes, “You should tell her, since Adora obviously likes you back.”

The brunette scoffed, “I doubt it, uh, not that I care if Adora likes me back, but even if you think she does, she probably doesn’t now. Erin probably has her wrapped in her ugly bitchy finger.”

Glimmer stood up and laughed, “Y’know what, you’re alright Catra. Sorry I thought you were a bitch, even though you kinda are, but anyways if you need anyone to talk to, I got your back. It’s fun getting all of the drama that’s happening between you, Erin and Adora.  _ Especially _ since sometimes I get to hear Adora’s side of the story,” the girl laughed while Catra just rolled her eyes again.

“God you’re so fucking annoying, what makes you think I would want to talk to you again?” Catra said. 

Shrugging, Glimmer got out a pink post-it note and started to frantically scribble on it, “Dunno, but here’s my number just tell me if you need someone to talk to. Like I said, it’s fun to listen to all of the shit that’s happening in your life. I can’t relate, I'm in a healthy relationship.”

The girl snacthed the post-it out of Glimmer’s hand, “Ugh just shut the fuck up. We get it, you’re in love, I don’t give a shit,” The other girl laughed while Catra slinged her bag over her shoulder and started to head out of the door, “Whatever, see you later Sparkles.”

“It’s fucking Glimmer!” Catra heard the girl yell on her way out.

  
  
  


After having a pep talk with Glimmer, the girl was walking through the dimly lit campus and back to her own dorm room to call it a day. Humming the song that she wrote, she still needed a name to title it, Catra sighed, “Should I really tell her?”

“Tell who what?” A familiar voice spoke out in the darkness.

Frightened, Catra jumped up, turned around and saw a grinning Adora looking at her, “Adora? What the fuck!”

The blonde stepped closer and smiled at Catra, “Hey Catra, I was just passing by and I saw you. I didn’t mean to eavesdrop but, what were you just talking about just now?”

Gritting her teeth with anger, Catra grabbed Adora by the collar of her shirt, “Where the fuck were you? It was fucking Cartoon Night tonight! Did you forget about it?” She let go of Adora’s collar and sighed, “Did you forget about  _ me _ ?”

“W-what?”

Catra looked away from Adora, “I sent you a text about Cartoon Night, but you didn’t fucking reply. Then I went to your place to see if Cartoon Night was there tonight, but then Glimmer told me that you were out with that bitch Erin.” She looked at Adora with hurt in her eyes, “Did you really forget about me to hang out with her?” 

Adora stepped closer to Catra, “S-sorry I’m really sorry! Erin asked me if I wanted to study with her and grab dinner but I totally forgot it was Cartoon Night! While I was out, I kept getting notifications- not from you, but from Snapchat, throughout the night so Erin just told me to turn off my phone so I can like focus on her or something,” The girl sighed, “I’m sorry… I didn’t see your message and I forgot, but I didn’t forget about you Catra,” Adora reached a hand forward to Catra, but the brunette pushed it away.

“Really?” Catra said in a bitter tone, “Because it fucking feels that way,” the girl let out a deep breath, “Just forget about it okay? I’m going to head back now,” Without letting Adora say goodbye, the girl just sprinted away from her, the brunette’s tears blinding her sight as she ran.

“Catra!” Adora yelled out, she reached out a hand towards the direction Catra ran in, “Catra!” she yelled out again, her voice echoing in the night.

  
  
  


Winter break ends in two more days, and Catra was spending most of the time preparing for her new semester. The girl stretched out her cramped arms from organizing her art supplies in her dorm room with a CORPSE song blasting in the background.

_ I don’t wanna look like this _

_ Fuck _

_ I don’t wanna feel like this _

_ Fuck _

_ Wish I didn’t miss her so _

_ Much _

_ Knew that this would happen, fuck lov- _

Suddenly, the song that Catra was was singing along to stopped abruptly as she was receiving a phone call, “Ugh fucking serious?” she groaned. The girl walked over to her phone and saw that the call was from Adora.

“Hey Adora,” Catra said without her usual snarkiness. She was still pretty upset about the whole Cartoon Night thing.

_ “Catra! Hey! _ Adora’s cheery voice said on the other line,  _ “I was just wondering if you wanted to go ice skating with me and Erin in like an hour? She invited me but I wanna invite you because I know you’re still pretty upset about the whole Cartoon Night thing- which again, I’m really sorry about. So how about you just come along with me and Erin?” _

Furrowing her eyebrows, Catra tried hard not to yell at Adora, “Adora are you shitting me right now? You want me to third wheel on your date with Erin? Fuck no. Plus would she even be okay if I ruin your date like that?”

_ “It’s not a date and you won’t be third wheeling. Come on just please come… we haven’t hanged out in a while and I miss you.” _

The brunette felt her heart flip in her chest when she heard Adora miss her. She huffed, “Fine.”

  
  
  


Immediately, Catra regretted coming along to the fucking ice rink. One, Erin was there. Two, she didn’t know how to fucking skate and she did not want Erin to out do her, since it was obviously  _ not _ the first time Erin was skating. And three, it was fucking freezing.

After tying her skates on and her hair into a messy ponytail, Catra wobbled over to the ice rink and saw Adora skating freely with Erin on her side. “Ugh this fucking sucks, why’s it so fucking cold,” she grumbled as she held on to the sides of the skating rink. The girl had zero balance, even with holding on to the railing so she stumbled forward and fell.

“I’m going to fucking kill myself,” Catra said under her breath as she struggled to get up, “Why is ice so fucking slipperly?”

“Need help?” A soft voice said. The brunette looked up and saw a tall girl who had a golden nose ring, with long black hair tied in a braid and stunning pale blue eyes, looking down at her. Without saying anything, Catra took the girl’s hand and got up. 

Grabbing the railing again like her life depended on it, Catra looked at the girl, “Thanks.”

The girl skated around Catra, “I’m Gail by the way. Uh… I saw that you were kinda struggling a bit and I was wondering if I can uh… help you out. I’m pretty good at skating if I must say so myself.”

Catra laughed, “I think I’m goo-” as if it’s on cue, she slipped forward but was caught safely in Gail’s arms. They met eyes for a brief moment and Catra looked away. Still in Gail’s arms, the brunette looked around the rink and saw Adora stopped skating with Erin to glare right at her and Gail. She smirked to herself and thought,  _ I think I have a plan. _

Laughing awkwardly, Catra looked up at Gail and fake smiled at her, “Y’know what? Maybe you can teach me. I’m a bit clumsy,” she purposely slipped again but Gail got her and stood the girl back up, “Whoops.”

Gail smiled back, “Just hold onto my arm okay- uh, for  _ balance _ ,” she winked, “Then uh, just push out on the ice with your back feet. Don’t worry, I won’t let you fall.”

“You’re the boss,” Catra said in a smooth voice. She and Gail then skated past Adora and Erin. Which was  _ hilarious _ to Catra since Erin was trying so hard to grab Adora’s attention but the blonde’s eyes were fixed on Catra already. Hell, Erin even fell down thinking that Adora was going to catch her. But the sorry bitch just got an ass full of ice instead.

Knowing well that Adora was watching her, Catra leaned in closer to Gail and wrapped her arm around hers tighter, “Wow you are  _ really _ muscular, do you work out?” Catra said loudly enough for Adora to hear.

The raven haired girl scratched her blushing cheek and awkwardly chuckled, “Y-yeah, I uh, go to the gym and I competitively ice skate. How about you? What are your hobbies?”

“Write music and draw,” Catra said, not really paying attention to the conversation, since she was way too busy thinking of different tactics to make Adora more jealous, “Well… I am an art major afterall.”

Catra heard Gail say something next to her, but she ignored the skater when she saw Adora and Erin skating around together in perfect synchronization with their arms linked together. The brunette even heard Adora say, “Wow Erin, you’re  _ so _ good at this!”

_ Are you fucking kidding me? _ Catra thought,  _ Now she's flirting with Erin? Fuck! I knew this plan was a bad idea. I should have just stuck around with Adora to make sure bullshit like that wasn’t going to happen!  _ The girl felt her head spin and her stomach turn with disgust,  _ Ugh… I feel sick. _

“-ello?”

The girl looked back at Gail who was holding out a piece of paper with what Catra assumed was the girl’s number. Trying to play it cool after seeing Adora and Erin together, which fucking pissed her off, Catra raised an eyebrow, “Do you always carry a piece of paper around with your number on it?”

Rubbing the back of her neck nervously, Gail blushed, “Y-yeah… y’know just in case I run into any pretty girls on the rink…”

Politely, Catra took the paper and put it in her pocket after flashing Gail a fake smile. Feeling her stomach twist and turn more, Catra sighed, “It was nice meeting you, but I think I’m going to rest a bit. Maybe I’ll see you later,” Before Gail could say goodbye, Catra awkwardly skated over to the exit of the rink, trying so hard not to fall like an idiot, and took off her skates on the nearest bench. 

Feeling like absolute shit, Catra looked at the number Gail gave her and tossed it in the nearest garbage bin. After that was settled, she looked up back at the rink and saw Adora and Erin laughing together like everything was perfect. 

But it  _ wasn’t _ perfect.

At least to Catra.

The girl untied her hair and buried her face in her hands. As she silently let a tear roll down her cheek, she whispered softly to herself, “Why’d I even try to make Adora jealous…? I don’t think she even cared.” She looked back up at the rink and saw the two other girls laughing with each other again, “How come I can get a total stranger’s attention, but not yours?

All I want is  _ you _ .”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sooo we got the whole catra and glimmer parallel thing and yuh it was great i LOVE platonic glitra they are wholesome. yeah i made the whole catra makes adora jealous thing but i made so it DOESNT WORK BC IM JUST GIVING CATRA A HARD TIME AND IDK WHY I SWEAR I LOVE HER BUT SHE'S JUST GOING TO SUFFER A LOT RIGHT NOW IM SORRY! yeah if you think about it, i do feel bad for my original character, gail, she like gave a pretty girl her number only for her to like NEVER see her again. anyways adora is being a little ding dong right now but we'll get to that soon i promise.  
> anyways out of the non chapter stuff: i really love you guys and im grateful for every one of you who is reading my story, i see your suggestions in the comments and i REALLY like them like i REALLY do part of today's chapter was from actually from a commission request (shout out to bluekorra98 for the wonderful idea of the ice skating bit in the chapter!) and i just want to say that i want to make this story enjoyable to my readers and so if you want you can ALWAYS put in a suggestions but i have to warn you that i might not use them because it might not fit in with the original plot/pacing that i intended to write bc i dont want to make things really complicated and/or long (though I love creating drama in this story LOL) but i will always keep your suggestions in mind and i will made like bits of your requests in the story for them to fit in like naturally yknow at least that's my intention (if that makes sense) so if you can you are always free to comment any suggestions you want down below i will always keep them in mind. anyways so i hope you guys liked today's chapter and feel free to leave a comment on your thoughts down below! SNEAK PEAK: tmr's chapter is going to be more messy drama wise. anyways hope yall have a good morning/afternoon/evening! :)


	15. jinxed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> adora invites catra to a party

The first week of the second semester felt like hell to Catra. None of her professors gave her mercy with new projects, assignments, and expectations. The girl was exhausted and was grateful that weekends existed. After a long day of going to boring lectures, Catra opened the door to her dorm and flopped on her bed, “Finally… it’s Friday.”

Catra opened up her Spotify and started to play lo-fi hiphop songs just to keep her relaxed. “Wonder what Adora is doing right now… I haven’t really talked to her since school started. We’ve both been hella busy,” she spoke softly to herself. The girl reached for her phone but immediately retracted her hand back, “God… if I ask to hang out she’ll just bring Erin with her, and I don’t want to sit through another disaster.”

Eyeing her phone, Catra muttered, “Ah fuck it,” she opened her contacts and pressed on a contact named, “queen sparkles.” The phone rang for a couple of seconds until Glimmer eventually picked up.

_ “Catra what the fuck do you want,” _ Glimmer’s cranky voice said from the other side of the call.

The brunette hummed, “I’m bored and hungry, can you come up to my place and get some of the campus fried chicken along the way?” 

_ “What? Fuck no! Why would I be your servant?” _

Smirking, Catra shrugged, “Who was the one who helped you through your Humanities pop quiz, which you got a 95 on, by looking up and texting you answers? 

_ “Fuck you.” _

The girl smiled in pleasure as Glimmer hung up on her. She looked down at her watch and calculated that Glimmer should take around 15 minutes to get here with the fried chicken. In the meantime, Catra got down from her bed and looked underneath her bed to find her acoustic guitar. She looked under and grimaced when she saw her black bass guitar case, back when she was in her old band. The girl ignored it and got out her acoustic guitar and started to play mindless chords to kill time.

Leaning against her bed as she played her guitar, Catra closed her eyes and uttered, “Why didn’t I get rid of that stupid bass yet?”

  
  
  


Just like Catra calculated, 15 minutes later, an irritated Glimmer was standing outside of her dorm, holding a bag of the campus’s fried chicken. Catra licked her lips and took the bag from Glimmer. The brunette quickly cleared her studying table and started to eat. “Well… I’m going to be heading out now,” Glimmer said, slowly turning around to face the exit again.

“Woah what?” Catra said, holding a drumstick in her left hand, “I thought we were going to hang out. Don't you dare change your mind on me.”

Rolling her eyes, Glimmer sat down on the floor across from where Catra was eating, “Okay fine! I didn’t realize you’d be  _ this _ needy when I gave you my phone number.”

With her mouth full, Catra said, “No going back.”

“Swallow first then talk!” Glimmer scolded, the girl rubbed her eyes, “Why did you want to hang out with me anyways, what’s up?”

Grabbing another piece of chicken, Catra sighed, “I dunno dude, school’s been pretty exhausting and I wanted to hang out with someone like just one on one y’know. I was gonna hit up Adora but then Erin was probably going to come with us and I did  _ not _ have the energy to be within a 50 meter radius with her.”

Glimmer laughed, “So what, I’m your second pick?”

The brunette gave her a nasty smirk, “Yeah exactly,” the girl rubbed the back of her neck with her free hand, “So uh… how’s Adora anyways, I haven’t really talked to her this week, y’know being busy and all and like the fucking Erin thing. How’s she doing?”

“She’s doing alright, pretty stressed out for the new semester too but she’s been studying with Erin these days,” Glimmer said, the girl looked up at Catra who was clenching her jaw, “Y-you okay?”

Catra scoffed, “What, is Erin her new best friend now? She never asked me to study! Fuck she’s barely been texting me too! Did she really just forget about me like that! What the fuck!”

As if it was on cue, Catra’s phone started to ring and she saw that it was from Adora. Glimmer blinked at the contact and looked up at Catra who was staring at it in shock. “Pick it up dammit!” Catra quickly reached out for the phone and accepted the call, before that she heard Glimmer mutter, “Fucking useless lesbians.”

_ “Hey Catra?” _

The girl was shocked hearing Adora’s voice again, it’s been a while since they’ve talked. With their new schedules and everything, they haven’t been really seeing each other on campus, “H-hey Adora!” Catra stuttered, she looked over at Glimmer who facepalmed at what a disaster she was, “Uh… w-what’s up?”

_ “So there’s this party tomorrow to celebrate the first week of the semester or something. So uh… I was wondering if you wanted to go with me?” _

Catra furrowed her eyebrows, “A party? Uh… I don’t know I’m pretty fucking tired because of the first week of the semester. I don’t know if I want to use my weekend to hang out with fuckboys and stoners.”

The brunette looked over at Glimmer who was giving her a “what the fuck are you doing,” look. The girl hissed, “Just go dammit!”

_ “O-oh uh okay-” _

Laughing nervously, Catra stuttered again, “Y-y’know what? A party sounds  _ great _ ! I- I think I’ll go. You really helped change my mind about not going to the party,” she looked over at Glimmer and gave her a thumbs up. Tired of Catra and Adora’s bullshit, Glimmer facepalmed again and just lied down on the floor.

_ “Oh that’s great! Cool uh, I can go to your dorm and we can walk there together. Be ready at like 9. See you soon!” _

“Y-yeah bye!” Catra said, before the call ended. She looked over at Glimmer and grinned, “I think I handled that pretty well!”

The shorter girl just laid her head back on the floor and stared up at the ceiling, “Useless lesbians.”

  
  
  


Looking in the mirror, Catra checked out the clothes that she picked out for the party, it was nothing extravagant, just ripped jeans, a black shirt, and a red unbuttoned flannel. Y’know like the stereotypical lesbian outfit. The girl looked at her messy mane and decided to tie it up, she didn’t want her hair to be soaked in alcohol and sweat by the end of the night.

The girl stared at her reflection again and slightly smiled at it, “I think… this is actually going to be an okay night. It’s just a feeling I have.”

There was a knock on the door and Catra quickly opened it and saw Adora wearing her usual outfit, gray sweatpants, a white undershirt, and her red varsity jacket. The blonde smiled at Catra, “Wow… you look great!”

“Y-yeah… you too!” Catra blushed.

Adora grinned, “You uh… ready to go?”

The brunette nodded, “Where’s the party anyways?”

“Some random frat house I think, don’t worry I have the directions to get there,” Adora said confidently. She reached her hand out for Catra to take, “You coming?”

Without any hesitation, the girl took Adora’s hand and thought to herself,  _ Yeah I think this is going to be a really good night.  _

  
  
  


Partying has never really been Catra’s thing, nor did she think it was really Adora’s thing. They were always too loud and crammed with people. No matter where you go, you’re bound to bump into someone. Staying close with Adora, Catra covered her ears to escape from that awful party music. It was torture for a music major like her. 

Nudging Adora, Catra asked, “I didn’t think you would be into parties. I pegged you as more of a chill person who wants to hang out on libraries or rooftops, rather than go to obnoxious parties.”

The blonde smiled, “Yeah… I’m not really into parties but Erin invited me!”

_ Wait what? _

Catra looked at her in surprise, “E-Erin? She’s here? What the fuck. You didn’t tell me she was going to be here!” She yelled over the loud music that was pulsing in her ears.

“Okay I know I didn’t tell you!” Adora said, looking at Catra in her eyes, “But I knew if I would you wouldn’t come-”

“Fuck yeah I wouldn’t’ come!” Catra said, her teeth gritted.

Adora placed a hand on Catra’s shoulder, “But I  _ really _ wanted you to come. Sorry for lying to you Catra. But can we just please have a good time?”

The brunette shut her eyes and took a deep breath, “Okay,” she muttered.

“Thank you,” Adora said, smiling at her. The girl looked ahead of her and saw Erin with a group of people that Catra didn’t recognize, sitting on a couch, “Oh I see Erin! Uh is it cool if I say ‘hi,’ to her real quick? After that we can just hang out somewhere.”

Catra shrugged, “Yeah sure,” she said in a soft tone, “Uh… I’ll just get some drinks okay? I’ll uh see you in a minute.”

Walking in opposite directions, Catra slithered through the crowd of people and walked over to where the drinks were. She hit her forehead with her hand, “Ugh why was I so fucking naive? Of  _ course _ she was going to be here. Of course she was…” she added softly at the end, “I was stupid to think that I would be able to be with Adora alone.”

“What’s your poison beautiful?”

The girl looked up and saw a tan tall girl with long pink curls, dark mascara and a lip piercing smirking at her. Catra shrugged, “I dunno… just give me two of whatever I guess.”

The pink haired girl smirked, “Alright,” she handed Catra a random cup of what the brunette assumed was jungle juice and started to head back to where Adora was, “Woah, woah, where do you think you’re going? How about we talk a bit?” Catra heard the girl say.

She scoffed underneath her breath and turned back to the girl, “I’m Haley, how about you?”

“Catra.”

Haley smiled and walked closer to Catra, “Nice to meet you Catra, you here with anyone or do you just like having two drinks at once like me?”

The shorter girl looked at the floor, “Mm… I  _ was _ here with someone.”

“Means you’re not here with someone currently then,” Haley cooed, “How about we head to the back and get some alone time to ourselves?”

Slowly walking away from Haley, Catra scoffed, “I’m not in the mood right now so  _ please _ don’t mess with me,” she said bitterly.

Stepping forward whenever Catra stepped back, Haley smirked, “I’ll get you in the mood then, I’m pretty good at what I’m doing. Not to brag or anything,” The pink haired girl then reached out a hand to wrap it around Catra’s waist.

Catra looked away from Haley and saw a flash of blonde hair the direction Adora was, “I said I fucking don’t have time for this!” Cooly, Catra took her drink and splashed it on Haley’s face. With that diversion, the girl got out of the girl’s grasp and slipped back into the crowd, towards Adora. “Well, I don’t drink anyways so this’ll just be for Adora.”

“Hey,” she saw Adora sitting on a couch, Erin cradling her hips and kissing the blonde. Catra stood there in shock and dropped the drink she was holding. Never in her life did Catra feel so horrible. She wanted to throw up right there when she saw that horrible sight. She managed to crack out a small, 

  
“ _ Adora _ ?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well that happened. uhhh but hey we got a platonic glitra moment yall like that right haha... (please dont hurt me) uh so yeah... fuck you erin the next chapter is gonna be something. please dont yell at me I TOLD YOU THAT CATRA IS GOING TO SUFFER A LOT OKAY?!!! SO I DID WARN YOU OKAY SO YOU SHOULD HAVE LISTENED TO THAT WARNING AND PREPARED FOR THE WORST BC NOTHING WORSE CAN HAPPEN THAT WHAT ALREADY HAPPENED. anyways about the platonic glitra moment i loved writing that, i don't ship glitra bc tbh i dont think it would work out but glitra being platonic and wholesome *chefs kiss* i love my two parallels. anyways hope you guys liked this chapter (like how its written this chapter turned out pretty shitty for catra at the end lol) and uhhh feel free to express your opinions of the chapter down in the comment sections and yeah hope you all have a good morning/afternoon/day!


	16. i did this all for you, look what i turned into

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> catra confronts adora

After splitting up with Catra, Adora walked over to the couch where Erin and some of her other friends were. Erin walked up to Adora and brought the girl in a big hug, “Adora! So glad you could make it!”

Adora smiled at her, “Yeah, thanks for inviting me!”

Erin hummed in reply and gave Adora a shot, “Here let’s take some shots together. I already had two but one more can’t hurt right?”

Politely taking the glass, Adora took a whiff of the beverage, which burned her nostrils. She looked skeptically at the drink, “Okay…” she said softly. The girl quickly downed the shot and felt the alcohol burn her throat, “Ugh… that was s-strong.”

“That’s why it’s good,” Erin slurred, “Adora you look r-really pretty right now. I mean you do everyday. But for some reason in this lightning, you look  _ ten _ times better,” the girl rubbed the back of her neck, “Heh, maybe because I’m a bit drunk right now.”

The girl blinked at Erin, “O-oh uh thanks,” she said, slightly blushing, but the compliment didn’t mean much to her to be honest. Adora turned her head and tried to find Catra in the crowd, “Huh… I wonder what’s taking Catra so long.”

Suddenly, Adora felt her body get pushed back on the couch and she looked up and saw Erin touching her chin gently, “W-what are you doing?” Adora said, her head a bit dizzy because of the shot she drank. She's a lightweight okay?

Erin started to straddle on Adora’s hips and she got closer to the blonde’s lips, “I’ve always wondered what your lips would feel like on mine…” she whispered. Before Adora could even react or say anything, the two girl’s lips met. Erin’s lips were soft and velvety, but this was  _ wrong _ . Adora didn’t want this, she only wanted to be friends with Erin. Plus, she had already someone else in mind.  _ Catra _ . 

Quickly pulling away from the kiss and about to yell at Erin, Adora heard a familiar voice call out her name, “ _ Adora _ ?” 

The blonde’s eyes grew wide, and she turned around to see Catra staring right at her. This timing couldn’t get any worse. She quickly pushed Erin off of her and stood up to face Catra, “C-Catra! It’s not what it looks like I  _ swear _ !”

“Then I must be fucking blind,” Catra scoffed. The girl quickly turned around and started to walk out of that damn frat house. She shoved people that were in her way, she didn’t care anymore. Catra just wanted all of this to end. 

Adora reached out to Catra, she turned around to glare at Erin, “What the fuck? Why would you just kiss me like that? I don’t like you in that way! Ugh!” she bit her lip and gave her another nasty look, “I don’t like you at all, I never want to see you again.”

“Wait Adora!” Erin called out.

Ignoring Erin, Adora ran to get Catra and talk to her.  _ Please…  _ Adora thought,  _ please don’t leave! Not when I didn’t explain anything yet! Dammit! _

  
  
  


Catra kept walking and found herself on the bench that she usually sat on to sketch. Exhausted by all of the bullshit that has happened, she sat down on the bench and covered her face with her hand. A minute later, she heard panting next to her, she uncovered her face and saw Adora sitting next to her, a bead of sweat dripping down her face.

The brunette was tired and just ignored the girl. Adora looked at Catra, who had tears poking out of her eyes, “Catra… what happened back there-”

“I saw it with my own fucking eyes Adora! Don’t tell me it’s not what it looks like!” Catra roared, “What did I fucking say! I told you Erin was only getting close to you because she wanted to fuck you! But of  _ course _ you don’t listen to any of my warnings!”

Adora sighed, “Okay I get it you were right! I was wrong! But just saying if I listened to warnings we wouldn’t have been friends!”

The shorter girl looked at the floor and started to laugh, Adora looked at her in shock. Catra stopped her laughter and looked at Adora, “I understand now… You kept Erin around because you liked the attention she was giving you. Is that right?”

Growing furious and frustrated, the blonde scoffed, “No! What’s so difficult for you to understand that I just wanted to be friends with her? I didn’t want her to kiss me!”

“Why’d you let her even get that close to you then so she could kiss you?” Catra said, her voice cracking a little bit.

The girl took a deep breath, “Okay please, let me explain, when you were gone I had a shot so I was a bit tipsy okay? Erin was really drunk too and all I knew was that I was looking for you and then her lips were on mine. I didn’t want that to happen!”

Crossing her arms, the brunette looked at Adora and spoke in a low tone, “We used to be okay, y’know just the two of us. We would always have a schedule where we would text, call and hangout. I always looked forward to those little moments to be honest. We even had Cartoon Nights which you loved so much. But ever since  _ she _ came, everything has been changing.  _ You’ve _ been changing. I told you hanging out with Erin was a bad idea. She’s a bad influence!”

Adora let out a laugh, “Oh  _ she’s _ a bad influence? How about  _ you, _ ” her head started to spin,  _ What am I saying?  _ Adora thought,  _ Why am I saying all of this. Why am I so angry? Why are we arguing? Adora just shut up now befor-  _ “Maybe I’m changing because I got away from you! You’re the school delinquent right? You’re the one who did all of these terrible things that lost your friends! There was a reason they left you!” She slapped her hand over mouth and saw Catra looking at her in shock, “C-Catra I-”

“Are you serious?” She said, her voice unstably shaky, “I already  _ know _ I’m a piece of shit! I didn't need you to remind me of that! I know I fucked up with Entrapta and Scorpia!” She yelled, the tears finally flowing down her cheeks, “The whole world would have been just fine if I just didn’t exist!” 

The blonde stepped forward and reached a hand out to Catra, “W-wait Catra I didn’t-”

“Actually you’re right. I’m a bad influence. I’m a shitty person. Maybe you’ve just been changing because you’ve been away from me. So do yourself a favor and just leave me,” she looked up at Adora with tired eyes, “like everyone else.”

Refusing to move from her spot, Adora kept her eyes locked on Catra.

“Are you stupid?!” Catra roared, “I said leave!”

Frightened by the tone of Catra’s voice, Adora flinched and looked at the girl who’s tears were still running down her eyes, “I’m sorry…” she said quietly, “But if that’s what you want, I’ll leave,” Adora turned around and started to walk away from Catra.

Catra kneeled down on the floor to go into the child’s pose and started to sob loudly. The brunette cursed under her breath and saw how Adora’s back disappeared in the dark. “Don’t cry, don’t cry,” she assured herself, “This is for the better. Adora will be happier without me,” she started sobbing again, her cries echoed in the night.

  
  
  


It’s been a week since the party and Catra was a skeleton of a person right now. All she did was go to class, do assignments, barely eat, then sleep. It was like how she was before she met Adora. Catra still got texts from daily Adora and even from Glimmer occasionally, asking her how she was doing and stuff about their life, at least that was Adora’s texts. She read the messages, but never replied at all. She thought it was better for both parties if Catra just stayed away from them,  _ especially _ for Adora.

There was a buzzing and Catra saw that there was a text from Adora, the girl reached for her phone and saw what Adora had to say today.

dumb blonde chick: Good afternoon Catra! So today was pretty okay for me, I went to my bio lecture and then I got lunch with Glimmer and Bow, but it kinda got awkward when Erin came to the table. But don’t worry! I told her off and told her I never wanted to see her again. I told her that everyday during the party whenever she approached me, but I think she really got the hint this time! Haha, are you proud of me? That was a dumb question… Anyways, look, about last week I’m really still really sorry, it was out of line for me to yell at you like that. I don’t know if you ever see my daily messages but if you are, please talk to me again. I really miss you.

She stared at the text blankly and ignored it, still bitter about what happened. The girl sighed. There were so many times where Catra just wanted to reply back to Adora and just tell her that she wanted to see her again. But she always managed to restrain herself, because like she thought, it was for the better.

A few minutes later, the girl got up to go to her lecture for the day. After getting ready, Catra put on her hood to cover her face and walked out into campus, avoiding eye contact with everyone, she was not in the mood for social interaction. Not like anyone would talk to her though.

During her lecture, Professor Netossa, who is still her art teacher, assigned some class work for her students to just sketch whatever. That was easy work for the brunette. Catra got out her sketchbook and started to draw.

She shaded the shadows and made fine details to her drawing. After the lecture was over, she, along with other students, walked down to Professor Netossa and handed in their work. Being the last one in line, Catra handed the woman her drawing and was staring at the floor.

“W-wow,” Professor Netossa said hesitantly, “Your sketch is really good!” She looked up at Catra, who was avoiding eye contact with her, “Are you okay Catra?”

The brunette shrugged, “I’m doing fine, I’m just really tired y’know what I mean?” 

The woman looked at Catra, it was true, the girl looked ghastly. Giant eye bags under her eyes, her face was super thin, almost skeleton like, and her eyes, it looked like there was no hope in it anymore, it was just dull, “W-why aren’t you taking care of yourself dear are you alright? Where’s that friend of yours? The blonde one I saw before?”

Catra dryly laughed and looked up at Professor Netossa, “Gone. Just like everyone else,” she looked down at her watch, “I think I’m going to go now. I’m tired.”

“W-wait!” Professor Netossa called out, but the college student ignored her and continued out of the lecture hall. The woman looked down at Catra’s art piece again. It was a picture of a skeleton who’s eye sockets had tears coming out of it. It was holding a wilted flower, but you can see it’s shriveled heart still beating in its body. She sighed, “She’s gotten worse…”

  
  
  


Inside of her dorm, Catra picked up her phone and saw the last text from Glimmer, which the girl sent yesterday.

queen sparkles: aye catra you doing good? adora is hella worried for you im always here if you wanna vent tho 

Finally building up the courage to text back Glimmer after ignoring her for a week, Catra replied.

Catra: get your ass at my dorm rn

  
  
  


Pacing around her dorm to wait for Glimmer to come, after 5 long minutes, the girl was finally here. Catra pulled Glimmer inside and they both sat on her bed. Glimmer tapped her finger on her forearm and looked at Catra who was obviously really nervous, “So… what’s up? It’s uh… been a while.”

The brunette nodded, “Yeah… it’s uh, been tough on me these days. Sorry for not replying,” she looked down at her bed, “Does uh, Adora know you’re here?”

“Nah, don’t worry you’re good,” Glimmer smiled. Catra gave her a small smile in reply, and the cotton candy hair girl sighed, “What’s up with you and Adora anyways? All I know is that Adora kissed Erin and you saw and went off on her. Is that really it?”

Humming in reply, Catra leaned her head back on her pillow, “Basically but… it’s not just that. Adora… she uh, brought up some bad memories and said some pretty shitty things. It kinda messed me up,” she looked at Glimmer who was obviously confused, “It’s uh… about the whole Scorpia and Entrapta thing.”

“Ah… I see,” Glimmer nodded.

Catra sighed, “Yeah, she told me that there was a reason why they left me. Which is true, but it’s still kinda fucked me up because I had to be reminded of all of the shitty things I did in the past. I also may have mentioned that she’s changed since she’s been hanging out with Erin but she told me she changed because she got away from a bad influence, Adora meant me. That I was a bad influence. Y’know whole school delinquent stuff...” Catra let out a shaky breath, “I don’t know, it’s been hard on me… mentally.”

“And physically,” Glimmer pointed out, “Look at you, you’re all skin and bones. You must have lost like 10 pounds this week. Have you been eating at all?”

The girl shrugged, “Not really. For some reason, thinking about food, chewing and swallowing has made me feel sick. I tried to force myself to eat but I always end up throwing up. It’s pretty hard… but I’ve just been living with it.”

“What about water?” Catra looked up at her and shook her head. Glimmer placed her hand on Catra’s shoulder, “Dude, that’s not healthy, you should really eat up and stay hydrated. I’m going to be getting chicken and water for you okay? I’ll be back in a moment,” Catra watched as her friend got up and started walking out of the door. She turned back and looked at Catra and gave her a fond smile.

After the girl closed the door, Catra gently touched her throat and decided that there’s no way she’s going to be eating or drinking. The girl searched through her drawers and got out a post-it note and started to write on it. Catra slowly walked out of the door and slapped the note on the front of the door and walked away.

  
  
  


Walking back to Catra’s dorm, Glimmer sighed, “I can’t believe how bad she’s doing now…” she frowned, “Dammit Adora why’d you have to do the shittiest thing and leave it to someone else to clean up your mess?”

Approaching Catra’s dorm room, Glimmer looked up at the post-it note that was place there by Catra and stared at it, “What the fuck?”

_ Hey Glimmer thanks for buying food, but I think I’m good. You can just eat it yourself or something like that. I’ll find something on my own. Anyways, don’t worry about me. The dorm felt stuffy and I just wanted to go out to get some fresh air. Thanks for listening to me and keeping me company, it actually means a lot. Have a good night. _

_ -Catra _

  
  
  


The wind blew through Catra’s flowing brunette mane as she was standing on the railings of the library rooftop. She peered out into the distance and saw the city lights illuminate, along with the stars twinkling above. Catra leaned against the railing and looked down below, “Y’know, I could just-” the girl shook her head and backed away from the railing, “Ugh… as tempting as it is, no.”

Humming to herself, Catra outstretched her arms and lied down on the rooftop, looking at the stars. She smiled sadly to herself, “The stars here aren’t as good as the stars back in the mountains.” She frowned, “Why is everything so shitty now? I mean… it’s been shitty for a while. The only thing that kept me from really ending it was drawing and singing.”

“And then I met  _ her _ and she was something that was keeping me from ending it,” a tear rolled down Catra’s eyes, “But now she’s gone and I don’t think I can get her again, because I’m a shit person and she’s… not. She deserves better. Honestly, even drawing and singing isn’t really helping me anymore.”

Catra sobbed into her arm, “Why is all of this happening to me? Why  _ me _ ? Ms. Weaver, Hordak, Scorpia, Entrapta, Adora… What did I do in my past life to make the universe make me into a piece of shit and to make my life worthless?”

She wiped her tears out of her sight, “My life is a living hell and I can’t fucking escape from it,” outstretching her hand towards the stars, she whispered,

“I just want to be free.”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so, the kiss wasn't really adora's fault it was that bitch erin. BUT SHE DID SAY HELLA MEAN THINGS TO CATRA, EVEN IF SHE WAS A BIT TIPSY. yeah so if it wasn't clear, catra WAS hurt about the kiss but then like what really set her off was when adora was like "maybe i changed bc like i stayed away from you and you're a bad influence, there was a reason why your friends left you" (basically what she said lol) and like that triggered catra's whole like memory thingy of scorpia and entranpta leaving her thing. WHICH WE'LL GET TO I PROMISE IT'S COMING UP!!!! also YEAH if it wasn't clear catra MISSES adora at the end but she's like "oh im a bad influence i'll just stay away from her and ladaladalada" y'know bc like adora said some bad things smh anyways so we're not gonna see erin anymore THANK GOD im so done writing about her LMAO out of my original characters GAIL IS TOP TIER!!! (maybe i'll write a spin-off series about her moving on from catra and getting her own womans with would be another original character, idk it's up to if you'll be interested in it, but if i would write about it catradora would make an appearance for sure) ANYWAYS yeah catra is really going through it rn. so the adora POV was really short but we'll get more of her next chapter i promise anyways hope you guys enjoyed this chapter idk if it was angsty or not lol anyways feel free to comment down below of your opinions of this chapter and i hope you all have a good morning/afternoon/evening! :)


	17. the price of freedom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> adora struggles with her inner demons and so does catra

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !!!!CW!!!! attempted suicide at the end!

!!!!CW!!!! attempted suicide at the end! 

Staring at the text she sent to Catra this morning, Adora sighed, “Who am I kidding, she hasn’t replied in a week, she won’t reply now,” the door of her dorm opened and she saw Glimmer and Bow walking in holding a bag of chicken, “Why’d you buy that? We just ate like an hour ago.”

Glimmer shrugged, “Dunno, just craving it I guess,” she could not tell Adora that the chicken was supposed to be for Catra. The girl hasn’t even told Adora that Catra replied back to her and that she’s seen her today. It just wasn’t in her place to tell y’know? “But I knew I couldn’t finish it myself so I brought Bow over too.”

The bow smiled and waved at Adora who smiled back but then groaned loudly, “I don’t know what to do guys. It’s been a week and Catra still hasn't replied to my texts! She must be really furious at me.”

“You think?” Glimmer rolled her eyes, “You really fucked up Adora. I mean, even back when I didn’t really know Catra, I would have never said that. At least to her face,” Bow hummed, listening to the conversation as he took a drumstick and started to eat it.

Adora squeezed her eyes, “I know! I know I fucked up! I probably may never even talk to Catra again and it’s fucking freaking me out! I just… I want to apologize, I mean I  _ have _ been apologizing, over text I mean, but I want to do it in person. She deserves that,” the girl sighed, “But I can’t even find her, I don’t know her schedule this semester and I also think she’s avoiding me… which is valid.”

The other girl lied down on her bed and stared at the ceiling, “Look, Catra isn’t doing so hot right now,” she saw Adora look at her in shock, but Glimmer rolled her eyes, “Well I don’t know that for sure,” she lied, of course she knew, she saw Catra like an hour ago, “But, judging that she isn’t talking to anyone, she must be in a really tough place right now, mentally. I’d say give her some space.”

“But before I gave her space, when I was still hanging out with Erin and that just ruined everything! If I show that I care but checking up on her wouldn’t she feel more comfortable in talking to me again?” Adora asked. 

Glimmer stared at Adora in disbelief, “Adora I love you but, are you fucking stupid?” Shocked by her friend’s reaction, the blonde opened her mouth to speak but Glimmer cut her off, “Of  _ course _ things got ruined because you hanged out with Erin and gave Catra space, but that’s not what she wanted! She obviously still wanted to hang out with you but then you kept skedaddling with Erin, which made Catra feel like she was being replaced! Right now, since Catra isn’t talking to us and probably no one, it’s obvious that it’s a sign that she needs some time to be alone.”

Adora blinked, “Wow, you’re really good at analyzing things.”

“She really is,” Bow said, throwing his chicken bone away, “Sorry, I was listening in while I was eating. But I think I should speak up now. Anyways, you can keep texting Catra about your day and stuff because if you stop it’ll look to her that you gave up on her. So you can keep doing that but just don’t push too much about the whole… thing, okay?” 

Slightly smiling at her friends, Adora gave the others a group hug, “Thanks for all of the advice guys… I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

The boy hummed, “Of course Adora, we’re glad to help, you’ve been pretty down ever since you messed up with Catra. We know how much she means to you too.”

Nodding, Adora thought,  _ You have no idea… _

  
  
  


Walking towards her next lecture of the day, Adora saw a flash of a familiar brunette mane. She doubled back and saw a hooded figure, wearing sweats, “C-Catra?” The girl whispered. Adora then ran after the figure and tapped the shoulder, “Catra is that you-”

“Pardon?” the person turned around and Adora just saw another brunette girl, wearing large circular glasses. She didn’t resemble Catra at all.

Feeling embarrassed, Adora sighed, “U-uh sorry, I mistaken you for someone else,” she then quickly walked away and into her lecture hall. Adora thought,  _ I really thought it was her…  _

The girl couldn’t focus all day, everywhere she looked, she saw Catra’s face. Whether it was on the reflection of the mirror or on the face of a stranger. Adora sighed and poked her food during lunch break as her friends chattered around her. 

_ I think I’m going crazy,  _ the blonde thought,  _ Everywhere I go I see her, even when she’s clearly not there. I think I just miss her a lot. I mean who wouldn’t miss someone that you-  _

“Adora!” Someone yelled, shattering Adora’s train of thought. The girl looked up and saw Glimmer looking at her, along with her other friends cleaning up the tables and getting ready to head out of the cafeteria, “Are you going to finish up your food and go? We have Humanities in 30 minutes,” Adora looked down at her full plate of food, “You gonna finish it or what?”

Picking up her plate and standing up from the table, Adora shook her head, “Nah, I’m not hungry anyways, let’s just go,” Glimmer shrugged and the two girls started to walk out of the building. 

Though she didn’t feel like eating, the emptiness inside of her had no probleming eating away at her heart.

  
  
  


Exhausted from school, Catra had to have some sort of stress reliever right now. She looked at her desk and started to walk towards it. Drawing always helped her. After sitting down, Catra looked blankly at her sketchbook, for once, she was out of ideas to draw. The girl groaned on her desk and slumped over on it. “What the fuck, ugh I need  _ something _ to do…” 

She looked over at her phone, “Music, I’ll listen to music,” the girl pressed on her Spotify playlist which played, “Lose,” by NIKI.

_ I will never know if you love me _

_ Or my company, but I don’t mind _

_ ‘Cause I ain’t tryna be the one _

_ Been through this a thousand times _

_ I don’t need to take your heart _

_ You keep yours, I’ll keep mine- _

Catra turned off the music, she couldn’t listen to it, it reminded her too much of all the bullshit that was happening. It was painful to listen to. 

In the corner of her eye, she saw her acoustic guitar sitting there, “Y-yeah… I’ll play music, that always helps, I can do that. I can do  _ this _ .”

The girl picked up the guitar from it’s neck and sat on her bed. She plucked the strings mindlessly, she had no idea what to play until she looked to the right of her and saw a pinned music sheet of the song she wrote herself, “Fine, I’ll play that, even though I didn’t even fucking name you yet.”

Grabbing the music sheet from the wall, Catra plucked the strings and hummed along to the tune, she took a deep breath and started to sing. 

_ I guess I have to face _

_ That in this awful palace _

_ I shouldn’t show a trace of doubt _

_ But pulled against the grain _

_ I feel a little pain _

_ That I would rather do without _

_ I’d rather be- _

Abruptly, she stopped herself there, “I can’t do this,” she said, her voice trembling, “I can’t do this anymore. I’m tired, I’m so  _ tired _ . I just don’t want to do this anymore,” tears welled up in her eyes, which poured out onto the sheets of her bed, “Nothing is helping me, it just...just make it stop  _ please _ ,” she begged.

  
  
  


Another week passed and Catra wasn’t doing well, she felt so empty inside and every night she would wake up screaming from nightmares which purged her mind. The girl trudged walked to her desk, took out a piece of paper and started to scribble on it. 

She grabbed her sheet music and named it, “escapism.” Catra then took her guitar case, car keys, along with the letter she wrote and the music sheet and walked out of the room. She walked towards Glimmer and Adora’s dorm room and slipped the note under the door. 

“It’s time to end this.”

  
  
  


Walking back to their dorms, Adora sighed, “It’s been two weeks, I don’t know what to do, she never replies back to the messages and it’s just… is it really over for us? I never even told her- I,” Adora took in a deep breath while Glimmer listened to her rant, “I never got to apologize for real… I want to see her again. But you said she needs space? Ugh, this is so confusing.”

The cotton candy haired girl shrugged, “Hm… go and hit her up and tell her you want to talk, she’ll come. I think it’s been enough time for the both of you to think about what happened so you guys can actually have a conversation.”

Adora nodded, “That’s all I want…” she reached for the handle of her door and when she walked in she saw a strange paper on the floor, “Huh?” The girl picked it up and read it.

_ Hey Adora and Glimmer if you’re also reading this. So, I’m going to be going now, for a while and I don’t think I will be able to bounce back like usual. I’m grateful that I’ve gotten to meet the two of you, maybe in another life we’ll meet again. This life just wasn’t my cup of tea y’know? Anyways, this is going to be a final goodbye. So, thank you for everything and I’m sorry. _

_ -Catra  _

Staring at the letter in shock, a realization hit Adora and she looked at Glimmer with wide eyes, “She’s not going to-” Glimmer sharply inhaled a breath and she slowly nodded her head, “I have to find her! I’m  _ not _ going to lose her! Not like I lost Mara! I have to stop her!” 

Before Adora could run out, Glimmer grabbed the girl’s forearm, “You can’t do this alone! Go and find people to help… maybe people Catra is comfortable with!”

Adora nodded her head, “I know exactly who to go to,” she said confidently before the girl ran out of the dorm. Sprinting towards the art department, Adora begged that Catra’s professor was still there, “Please… please be there! We need you!”

Barging into the lecture hall, she saw Professor Netossa and Professor Spinerella flirting with each other, but stopped when the loud metal doors flew open and they saw Adora there. “What the-”

Panting heavily, Adora looked at the couple in distraught, “Catra… she’s in danger! Please help!”

The two women walked up to her, “Woah that?” Professor Netossa said, “What do you mean Catra is in danger?” Adora handed them Catra’s note and the two woman stared at each other in shock, “Okay, go to where you think Catra may be and make sure you have the hospital and our numbers on speed dial,” the woman took out her phone and showed her contact to Adora, who quickly punched it into her phone, “Spinny and I will try to find her too.”

Adora nodded, “I’m going to take her home, no matter what,” she said with great determination. She then quickly ran out of the lecture hall and towards the library, “She’ll be there… on the rooftops, she’ll be there!”

  
  
  


Breathing in the fresh air of the mountain, Catra sighed, “I knew this place was always special to me, but I didn’t know I’d die here. Oh well, destiny is a funny thing,” the girl sat down on the grass bed and took out her guitar and stared at her sheet music, “I’ll play one last song before I go. It’s appropriate that it’s the song I wrote I suppose.” 

Silently, she tuned her guitar and started to play, “escapism.”

_ I guess I have to face _

_ That in this awful place _

_ I shouldn’t show a trace of doubt  _

_ But pull against the grain _

_ I feel a little pain _

_ That I would rather do without _

_ I’d rather be… _

_ Free-ee-ee _

_ Free-ee-ee _

_ Free… _

_ I’d rather be  _

_ Free-ee-ee _

_ Free-ee-ee _

_ Free… _

_ Free-ee-ee _

_ Free-ee-ee _

_ Free… _

_ From here _

After finishing her song, Catra placed her guitar and music sheet on the floor as she stood up and walked towards the edge of the cliff, peering down at the lake below, “And that’s what I’m going to do.”

  
  
  


Breaking all traffic safety laws, Adora borrowed Glimmer’s car and drove into the mountains, “She  _ has _ to be there, if she’s not on the rooftops, she  _ has _ to be there!” Adora pressed Professor Netossa’s number and after 1 ring, the woman picked up, “I think I know where Catra is!”

_ “Really where?” _

Adora looked around the scenery, “Uh… I don’t exactly know where but she took me here before, I’ll share my location with you and then you can come meet me here. I’ll find her, don't worry!”

_ “What if she’s not there?” _

Gripping the steering wheel tightly, Adora said firmly, “She  _ is _ there. I just know it.”

  
  
  


Catra looked down at the lake and frowned, “I’m going to be falling into a lake? Ugh, I did  _ not _ think this through when I came here…” the brunette paced around, “I can’t fucking swim… oh well… I don’t need to anyways since I’m probably going to fucking die anyways,” she walked back over to the edge of the cliff and felt the gravel shift beneath her feet, “Do I really want to though…?”

  
  
  


Hiking quickly up the side of the cliff Adora grit her teeth in determination, “Catra, you’re alive, you’re alive!” Her voice cracked, “Please be alive…” Pushing the bushes in front of her, she finally got up to the top of the cliff and saw Catra standing at the edge. “Catra!” she yelled out.

The girl turned around and they briefly met eyes, until disaster struck and the rocks under Catra gave out and let her fall. 

“Huh…?” Catra said as she was falling down, “Was that Ad-”

_ SPLASH!  _

  
  
  


Catra opened her eyes and realized she couldn’t breath, she struggled in the water as she realized she was sinking down. Flashes of Ms. Weaver dunking her head in a sink full of water came back to her. That’s why she never learned how to swim. She was fucking terrified of water! 

Splashing mindlessly around in the water only made it worse, but it was all Catra could do. She looked up and saw the light from the sun grow dimmer as she sank down. Catra reached a hand up to the heavens and yelled under the water, but water just got into throat and she choked. It was no use, she was goner. But wait, wasn’t Adora there? No that couldn’t be, why would Adora be here? Damn, Catra really must have gone crazy.

Giving up, Catra stopped struggling and just gave into the tide. For some odd reason, drowning felt… peaceful to the girl, much more peaceful than when Ms. Weaver tried to drown her. Now she chose to drown, relaxing her body, Catra was finally letting go of everything and just closed her eyes.  _ Finally…  _ she thought,

_ I’m free. _

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well, that happened. BUT DONT WORRY ADORA IS THERE SHE'S GONNA LIKE SAVE CATRA AND THEY'LL BE FINE RIGHT? haha no, CUZ REMEMBER THINGS ARE STILL FUCKING AWKWARD BETWEEN THEM BUT they'll try to figure it out, baby steps y'know? anyways uh so adora OBVIOUSLY knows that she fucked up real good and she has glimmer and bow with her to like show her that she really fucked up and how to make things right between her and catra bc like obviously like what bow says, like catra means a lot to adora so yeah. dont worry friends, adora will get a "redemption" arc about the whole catra thing and it'll develop overtime it won't be like a ONE chapter thing. anyways yeah this chapter was something catra is really having a hard time she can't even do the things that she once did to escape reality (drawing and listening to / playing music) to help her. ALSO if she wasn't clear she couldn't sing "escapism" the first time bc it just hurt too much for her bc the lyrics were just too relatable BUTTTTT she sang it before she fell because she was like she thought it was appropriate for her to sing that song before she left because it was relatable to how she felt and the lyrics were like "I just wanna be free" and that's like all catra wants to like end this suffering so she attempts to take her own life HENCE the chapter title "the price of freedom" so yeah she did... that. AND I JUST WANT TO SAY!!! please don't take your own life there's always people out there who care for you even though you maybe don't realize it. taking your life ISN'T the answer! and don't give me that "it's a question and the answer is yes!" bullshit!!!! dont do that >:( anyways i hope you guys enjoyed this chapter and like feel free to like comment down below and yeah hope yall have a good morning/afternoon/evening!


	18. come rest your bones next to me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> adora tries to save catra

She couldn’t believe her eyes. Did Adora just see Catra fall to her death? The girl ran past Catra’s acoustic guitar and music sheet that was lying on the floor and over to the edge of the cliff. The blonde peered down and saw bubbles and ripples under the water. “I promised I’d take her home and that’s exactly what I’d do!” 

Stripping her sweater off of her and taking out her phone, she texted Netossa just to inform her that she found her and to get an ambulance. The girl picked up small pebbles and threw it down into the water to break the surface tension a bit, “Catra… we’re going home.”

_ SPLASH!  _

  
  
  


_ Catra opened her eyes and looked around. Where was she? She was in a room, one side of the room was painted black, the other was painted white. Weird. The girl looked down at her feet, weird, it felt like she was floating, huh. Catra looked back up and saw Adora, “Hey Adora!” The brunette tugged on Adora’s sleeve, “Let’s go this way!”  _

_ The blonde didn’t budge, “No, let’s go this way,” she said, walking towards the lighter side of the room. _

_ Gritting her teeth, Catra angrily shouted, “Why! Why do I have to follow you wherever I go? You never go with me to anything! You’re always the one leaving me so why do I have to come with you?” _

_ Adora turned around and Catra saw her crying black ink out of her eyes, “Catra, wake up.” _

_ “No! I don’t want to!” The girl walked to the end of the darker room and crossed her arms, “I’m staying here. It’s where I belong,” she felt her mouth shut and she closed her eyes, giving into the darkness.  _

_ The other girl looked at Catra sadly, “Catra please wake up.” _

_ The rooms started to spin and Catra heard Adora who was screaming at her to wake up,  _

_ “Catra!” _

  
  
  


“Catra!” Adora sobbed over the brunette’s body, “Please wake up,” she gave mouth to mouth to Catra again and pushed hard on Catra’s stomach humming along to the “Stay Alive,” song, “Please work dammit! I had to have learned something useful in high school!” 

After doing CPR for a couple of seconds, Adora sat back and looked at Catra in disbelief, “I can’t believe it… I was too late,” she placed a hand over her mouth and continued to sob, “I couldn’t save Mara and I couldn't save Catra. I wanted to be a hero but look at me I’m… useless I ruined everything.” 

She stroked Catra’s face with her bandhand, “Please… wake up,” she begged. Catra’s body didn’t move and Adora stood up and took in a shaky breath. A couple of more seconds passed and the blonde heard coughing behind her, she turned around and saw Catra coughing up a bit of water. 

“Catra!” Adora ran over to her and brought her into a warm embrace. 

The brunette blinked and looked at Adora confused, “A-Adora?” She muttered weakly.

Adora shushed her and cried into the crook of Catra’s neck, “D-don’t worry. People are coming to help, you’re going to be okay!”

“Why did you come?” Catra asked, shivering slightly since both her and Adora were soaking wet, “We both know I don’t matter!”

Holding Catra’s cheek with her hand, Adora cried, “You matter to  _ me _ !” 

“Don’t lie to me I know you hate me!”

“I  _ never _ hated you!”

Catra looked at her in disbelief, “Then… why did you say all of those things?” She choked out. 

Adora sighed, “I don’t know… it just came out in the heat of the moment and I’m really sorry. During the past two weeks I couldn’t stop thinking about you. About us! I never regretted anything more in my life,” Catra groaned as she placed her hand on her head, but Adora looked at her in the eyes, “I’m not asking you to forgive me, you have every right to stay mad at me. When you’re ready, I’ll be here and I’m not going anywhere, because… I care for you.” 

The brunette’s eyes grew wide and with the litter strength Catra had, she leaned in and softly kissed Adora. The blonde’s eyes immediately closed and she kissed Catra back. 

They then pulled away and Adora blushed as she looked at Catra. She touched her lips and could still feel the ghost of Catra’s lips linger on them, “You… kissed me?”

The girl shrugged, “Yeah… sorry,” she coughed, “I did… is that okay with you?”

“Of course it is,” Adora whispered.

There was a siren sound and Adora stood up, “They’re here!” She took in a deep breath and yelled, “We’re down here! Professor Netossa! Professor Spinnerella!” Adora heard some mutters up at the cliff and looked down at Catra, “I think they heard us, don’t worry, you’ll be okay.”

Catra nodded, “Okay.” 

A few minutes passed and Professor Netossa and Spinnerella, along with some EMTs came running down the mountain, “Adora! Catra! You’re okay! And you’re soaking wet,” Professor Netossa said.

Adora nodded, “We took a dip in the lake. But, I’m fine, but Catra needs help,” she looked over at the brunette who was holding her hand and smiled, “Can you walk? Or do you need the EMTs to help you?”

“I… I think I’ll need help,” Catra admitted, “I… feel a bit dizzy,” she swayed but thankfully someone was there to catch her. 

The EMTs helped an unconscious Catra onto a stretcher and they all carried her back to the ambulance, the other three trudging behind them. Adora watched as the medics settled Catra in the ambulance. She walked up the medics, “Can I… can I come with her? She’s my friend and I need to make sure she’s okay!”

“What do you think Spencer?” one of the medics asked.

A tall man with a manbun nodded his head, “Let’s go kid, we gotta take your friend back to the hospital,” the man also grabbed a towel from the back of the ambulance and threw it at Adora, “Don’t want you to get sick.”

Grabbing the towel, the blonde smiled kindly at him and looked back at Catra’s two professors, “Don’t worry about us!” Professor Spinnerella shouted, “We’ll follow right behind you!” Adora nodded and walked into the back of the ambulance along with two other EMTs.

Holding Catra’s hand throughout the entire car ride, Adora whispered, “You’re going to be alright, you’re not done. Not yet.”

  
  
  


There was a beeping sound echoing in Catra’s head. She woke up and looked around. How long was she out? Where was she? The room was sickly white and what the fuck was that beeping sound? She looked over to her left and saw monitors set up. She then turned to the left and saw Adora sleeping on a chair.

Catra looked down and saw IVs connected to her forearm. She groaned, her head hurt like a bitch, must have been when she hit it on the water. The girl felt Adora shift and wake up, “C-Catra! You’re awake! How do you feel?”

She shrugged, “Like shit,” Catra leaned back into the pillow and slightly smiled at Adora, “I think I have a concussion. My head is pounding like crazy.”

Adora laughed, “Yeah you’re right, you do have a slight concussion that’s what the doctor said when they were examining you. But you were knocked out cold. You must have been so tired.”

“Yeah…” Catra muttered. She looked over at Adora and sighed, “Hey you should go back to your place now. I don’t think I’m going to be discharged for a while. You uh, must be tired too so… I think you should go back.”

The blonde stared at Catra in shock, “W-wait what? I want to stay here with you though! I need to make sure you’re okay!”

“I know, I just need some alone time to process what happened. So please just leave okay?” Catra muttered. 

Adora nodded, “Okay… but I’m not going anywhere- um, figuratively I mean. Whenever you’re ready, I’ll be there for you. Because I care.”

She nodded and watched Adora leave her hospital room. “I guess she really does care if she came back for me and stayed by my side,” she muttered to herself, “But I can’t say I can forgive her… since, I still don’t understand, why did she say those things?”

The door opened and Professor Spinnerella and Professor Netossa came running by Catra’s side, “Catra! You’re okay how are you feeling?” 

“I’m doing okay… I have a headache and I feel a bit weak, but I’m okay…”

Professor Netossa looked at how ill Catra was, “Are you okay dear? Do you need us to help you with anything?” Catra looked away from her teachers, too ashamed to even look at them. The woman sighed and nodded at her wife, “Well… here’s me and Spinny’s numbers you are always welcome to contact either of us,” she gave Catra a small piece of paper with their contact information. 

Catra looked back at the two women and saw Professor Spinnerella holding out her acoustic guitar and her music sheet, “We found these back at the cliff, we figured you would like them back,” the woman placed the guitar gently at Catra’s side and put the music sheet on top of it. “I really liked your song, it has such a unique tone, with simple but meaningful lyrics. If I were to grade it, I would give it an A.”

“Thank you professors,” Catra muttered, “For everything.”

Smiling down at the girl, Professor spinnerella nodded, “Of course dear, Netty and I are going to be heading out now. Don’t worry about your attendance, we'll figure that out with the dean, Ms. Angella. Just focus on getting better okay sweetie?”

The brunette nodded and watched her two professors leave. A tear rolled down her eyes and she quietly cried to herself, she looked down at her shaky hands “W-why am I alive? I should have died… why did she save me? I don’t understand, they should have left me for dead, because that’s all I’m good for.”

“ _ Because I care,” _ Adora’s voice rang in Catra’s ear and she smiled sadly to herself,

“I guess…” the faces of Professor Netossa, Professor Spinnerella, Glimmer, and Adora popped up in her head, “Some people really do care…”

  
  
  


After spending 3 days in the hospital, Catra was finally discharged and going back to school. Things were still rocky between her and Adora though, but they’ve been trying to work things out. Waiting on the rooftops for Adora to come, Catra hummed to herself. Finally the door opened and she saw Adora come up, “Hey Adora.”

“Hey Catra,” Adora smiled. She then chuckled nervously, “So uh… what’s up? It really freaked me out that you wanted to talk in person,” she laughed anxiously again, “Not that I don’t want to see you in person! It’s just that it really caught me off guard when you texted me! I’m  _ always _ happy to see you!”

The other girl stared at the stuttering girl, “You good?”

The blonde let out another nervous laughter, “Uh… y-yeah! I’ve just been learning to watch my mouth these days. I don’t want to hurt you again,” Catra hummed in response, “So uh… what’s up?”

Catra rubbed the back of her neck, “So about the kiss that happened,” both girl’s faces started to heat up in the mention of the kiss, “Can we just try to forget about that please? I uh… didn’t mean to do it.”

Adora looked down, “O-oh… I see.”

“N-no!” Catra yelled, “I like you! I really do, it's just that I’m not ready for a relationship right now! I want to become a better person before I jump into a relationship. It’s for the best of us y’know? I’m still pretty fucked up and I don’t want to hurt you because my mind is in a shitty place right now,” Catra shook her head, “What I’m saying is that, I like you but… I can’t go into a relationship right now. So I’m willing to wait if you are.”

Smiling softly at Catra, Adora nodded, “Of course I’ll wait for you. And I think this is for the better too. I fucked up, and I need to learn from my mistakes so that that doesn't happen when we get together. But I’ll  _ always _ be here when you’re ready.”

Catra walked over and hugged Adora, “It’ll take a while, are you sure you can wait that long for me?”

“I’ll always wait for you.”

  
  
  


After having that talk with Adora, Catra walked back into her dorm room and slumped on her bed. “That went better than I thought it would,” she sat back up and fixed her hair. Catra walked over to her desk and took out the piece of paper with her professor’s numbers. 

“I never thought I would be doing this,” Catra said. But she wanted to become a better person now, not just for herself but for Adora too. The brunette just wanted to be the person that Adora deserved.

Catra: hey professor netossa can we talk about the therapist that you recommended back then?

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YAY HOMEGIRL WANTS TO GET BETTER NOW! adora really got friend zoned by catra tho lol, but it's for the better they aren't in the best place for a relationship rn. but yuh therapy time for catra, it's about time LOL. anyways i wanna talk about the little "scene" catra had when adora saved her. so i made like a white and black room and let's just say that the white side is like living and the black side is like death. so homegirl (catra) wanted to go to the death side, bc she WANTED to end her life but then adora saved her which is why adora is like begging homegirl to go to the living side because she wants catra to like live and stuff. yeah that was just a little subtle thing im proud of LOL i hope you guys got that too. ANYWAYS, let's just get this clear, catra DIDN'T let me repeat DIDN'T forgive adora yet for saying all that shit like weeks ago but like she kissed her cuz like whatever if a pretty girl says she cares about you idk I'D kiss her LOL but like yeah catra friend zoned her which was kinda funny ngl BUT IT'S FOR A SERIOUS PURPOSE LOL anyways yeah catra wasn't too happy that she's alive but like she understands that people care for her which kinda helps her be like "okay im here and i wanna get better so like ion hurt those who care for me again" anyways hope you guys liked this chapter i dont even know if you read my end notes but whatever i like to talk about my chapters and the symbolism LOL anyways so yeah feel free to comment down below and now yall cant come for my neck anymore for ONE relationship issues or TWO about to kill catra BC HOMEGIRL IS ALIVE NOW SO HAHAHA! yeah hope you guys have a good morning/afternoon/evening! :)


	19. change

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> catra goes to her first therapy session featuring lesbian icons netossa and spinnerella

Walking out of the car alongside Professor Netossa and Professor Spinnerella, they went into a small office and sat in the waiting room. Catra anxiously tapped her foot as Professor Netossa was talking to the receptionist. “Are you nervous?” A kind voice spoke.

She looked over at Professor Spinnerella who was smiling kindly at her, Catra nodded, “Yeah… I’ve never really liked the idea of therapy, it just weirds me out y’know? What if they judge me? To be honest, I’m a bit scared professor.”

“First, you don’t need to call me professor, at least not when we’re not in a school setting,” the woman smiled, “Just call me Spinnerella.”

Catra laughed nervously, “Sorry it’s a bit weird for me… Y’know because you’re my teacher and all,” she saw the woman shrug and the girl sighed, “Okay fine I’ll call you, Spinnerella,” she said hesitantly. 

Nodding her head, Spinnerella smiled, “Was it that hard? Anyways, second, let me ask you this: why are you going to therapy?” 

The girl looked confused, “Uh… so I can become a better person for Adora,” Spinnerella stared at her, “And for myself,” she added quickly. 

“Yes, it’s for yourself,” Spinnerella said, “I know it can be a bit uncomfortable and awkward to spew out all of your personal information and experiences to a complete total stranger, but speaking from personal experience, it really helps.”

The brunette blinked, “Y-you went to therapy?”

Spinnerella winked at her, “We all have our own demons,” she looked up at her wife who was coming back from the receptionist desk, “Hello dear, how long do we have to wait for Dr. Lynn?”

The woman sighed and sat next to Spinerella, “She’s finishing up with another patient right now, so we gotta sit here for a while,” Netossa looked over at Catra who was still tapping her foot, “You can wait right kid?”

Catra nodded, “Yeah of course Pr-” she saw Spinnerella slightly shaking her head, “Uh, Netossa, of course.”

Nudging her wife, Netossa laughed, “Did you tell her not to use professor dear?”

“Mm… maybe,” Spinnerella hummed. 

The door opened and a tall, thin woman with long black hair tied into a bun, wearing round glasses, holding a clipboard came out. The woman smiled at a patient who came out of the room also and looked down at her clipboard, “Catra? Hm, no last name?”

The brunette stood up and looked down at the two women who smiled proudly at her, “Good luck Catra, we’ll be waiting out here for you,” Spinnerella said.

“You’re gonna do great kid!” Netossa said encouragingly. 

The girl smiled at the two women and walked over to the tall woman, who also smiled kindly at her, “Hello Catra, my name is Dr. Lynn, and I’ll be your therapist.”

Catra nodded, “N-nice to meet you.”

“Let’s step into my office, shall we?”

  
  
  


Sitting down on the couch, Catra twiddled her thumbs as she and Dr. Lynn sat in a suffocating uncomfortable silence. The brunette looked up at Dr. Lynn who was looking through her papers. “Are you nervous?” 

The girl looked up, “Can you tell?”

“Well, I  _ am _ an expert on human behavior,” Dr. Lynn joked, “So yes, I can tell,” the woman put down her clipboard, “I noticed that you don’t use your last name?”

Catra bit the inside of her cheek, “Uh yeah… I don’t like it,” she remembered Spinnerella telling her to open up to the therapist, “B-bad memories when I went by that last name…”

Dr. Lynn hummed and jotted down on her notes, “I heard you’re an art and music double major, how is that going for you?”

Looking away from the woman, Catra rubbed the back of her neck nervously, “It’s uh… it’s going okay. I don’t really think of my school work, as actual school work, if you know what I mean. I’m really passionate about drawing and music so it’s easy for me to get things done,” she heard Dr. Lynn’s pen scribble on her notes, “But these days I’ve lost motivation to regularly draw and sing, even listen to music. It’s just… painful.”

The woman motioned her to keep talking and Catra hestitanly nodded, this was so weird for her, “Um… before, like a year ago I mean, I thought about ending it all a couple of times, but I used drawing and music as an escape to just not think about those thoughts and it worked, I didn’t think about killing myself often anymore. But then a month ago… things changed and those thoughts came back and not even my escapes could help them. Music and art just made those thoughts grow. And then… I did it. I attempted to take my life…”

“If you can,” Dr. Lynn stopped writing her notes and looked up at Catra, “Can you go a little more in depth? Only if you’re comfortable of course.”

The brunette looked at the floor, “Well… I never had the best childhood, I never met my parents and the orphanage owner was always cruel to me, her name was S-” Catra stuttered, “Sh-Sh-” all of the flashes of Ms. Weaver abusing her came into her head and she clasped a hand over her mouth, “I- I can’t say her name.”

Dr. Lynn placed her warm hand on top of Catra’s, “We can stop here dear,” Catra shook her head and the doctor sighed, “Do you want to use a code name? Many of my patients tend to use code names to mention characters in their past,” The girl nodded, “Very well.”

Catra bit her lip, “Shadow Weaver, her name was Shadow Weaver. She would always… pick on me and whenever I did something bad she would… dunk my head in water, trying to drown me,” tears poked out of the corner of her eyes, “She said that she didn’t want to do that, but I left her no choice. She said it was my fault.”

“Did what she said and did affect you in any way?” 

The girl frowned, “Well… I’m afraid of water now, I never learned how to swim since I would always remember the time when Shadow Weaver tried to drown me,” she looked up at the therapist who continued to write down notes, “After spending years in the orphanage I got adopted by… I’ll call him Prime. I thought Prime really cared about me, I even thought of him as my savior from that awful orphanage. He was mayor of this town, you see and I found out he only used me to get more votes for his election.”

“After I learned the truth, he tossed me aside and never cared about me. When it was time for college he provided me the fundings since he was stinking rich after his term, and I never saw him again. During college I had two friends, but then I lost them because I messed up really badly. While they went on with life, I stayed behind and wallowed in regret and self pity,” Catra looked up, “Yeah, that’s a bit of my background.”

Dr. Lynn stared at her notes, “If you are comfortable, do you mind sharing why you attempted…? I just want to see if my thesis is correct.”

Catra nodded, “Um… I have this friend, let’s call her Blondie. So Blodnie met another friend, uh, Trash. Trash and I didn’t get along because we both… liked Blondie. But then things turned bad between me and Blondie when she started to put Trash first and casted me aside,” she took in a shaky breath, “I had this argument with Blondie and I told her she changed and that Trash was a bad influence. But then she told me that I was a bad influence and that there was a reason why my friends left me before,” she heard Dr. Lynn sharply inhaled and Catra looked up, “After that I ignored her for 2 weeks and then I tried to end my life, but then she saved me and I’m here now. Oh and uh, we don’t talk to Trash anymore.” 

The woman talked as she wrote down notes, “So how are you and… Blondie now? Did you make up?”

“Somewhat? We have mutual… romantic feelings for each other but we also agreed that it’ll be better for us to work on ourselves first. Though I like her,” Catra scratched her cheek, “I can’t forgive her yet for saying those things. It really… hurt me and drove me into a pretty dark place.”

The therapist hummed, “I see,” she looked up at Catra and put her notes away, “Well, I collected all of the information I needed. So, Shadow Weaver as always picked on you for some reason, but then you got adopted and you thought Prime was your savior, but then he casted you aside too, because he never really cared for you,” Catra nodded, she already knew all of this, “When you met another ‘savior,’ and I assume that was your friends, you were afraid of being casted aside so then you casted them aside but then lost them because of that.”

Catra looked tiredly at the ground as Dr. Lynn continued, “After being left by your friends, you closed yourself off from everyone and stayed in your lane, making sure not to get close to anyone anymore. But then you met Blondie, and she helped you but then you got casted aside for Trash. After you confronted her she unraveled all of your trauma and that really clicked off for you,” Catra nodded, “From what I interpreted, is that throughout your life, you’ve been casted aside and you’ve always felt like you were second-best. Not good enough. Am I correct dear?” 

The girl laughed wryly, “Spot on doc…”

The woman looked at the brunette, “Catra, I know you’re going through a giant block in your life right now and I understand that it could be hard for you to explain it. But I just want you to know, the only person that can help you is yourself, I’m just merely a guide. But I believe you can overcome this Catra, you’re a strong girl,” Dr. Lynn adjusted her glasses, “So to help you guide you a bit, I have a bit of homework for you if you don’t mind.”

“Homework?”

“Preciously,” Dr. Lynn smiled, “It won’t be much I promise,” She stood up and grabbed an old Sony camera, then handed it over to the girl, “I just need you to vlog your daily life, do you think you can do that?” Taking the camera, Catra nodded and stood up, “Well, that’s our session for today, it was a pretty short one, but let’s get out there to your family.”

The girl blinked, family? 

Walking out the office door, Catra saw Netossa and Spinnerella waiting for them. “Hey kiddo,” Netossa smiled, “How’d it go?”

“S’fine,” Catra shrugged.

Dr. Lynn smiled, “I wanted to talk to you both. I assigned your daughter a bit of homework,” raising an eyebrow, Catra looked over at Netossa and Spinnerella who were nodding their heads as they listened to the doctor, “It’s nothing much, she just has to videotape herself of her daily life, just so I can get a glimpse of it. Y’know just so I can see how well she’s handling things. I just need you two to make sure that she does them. Will that be okay for you?”

Spinnerella smiled brightly, “Yes of course we’ll make sure Catra does them.”

“Come here pipsqueak,” Netossa grabbed Catra and gave her a noogie, “You better do your homework, got it kiddo?”

Grumbling, Catra got out of Netossa’s surprisingly strong bear grip, “Yeah sure.”

Dr. Lynn laughed, “You three are such a sweet family,” there it was again, Catra  _ definitely _ heard Dr. Lynn refer to them as a family, “Well it was a pleasure meeting you Catra I hope to see you soon.

“Y-yeah,” Catra stuttered, still flabbergasted that Dr. Lynn thought they were family, “See you.”

After leaving the office and walking to the car, Catra looked over at Spinnerella and Netossa who were laughing with each other, “Um… aren’t you guys weirded out that Dr. Lynn thinks we’re a family? I mean you guys are my professors…”

Netossa bursted out in laughter, “Nah, I don’t. Do you Spinny?” 

Shaking her head, Spinnerella smiled, “Of course not dear.” She focused her attention on Catra, “We can be like your two unofficial moms! W-well… if that’s okay with you.”

_ Guardians? _ Catra thought,  _ The only parental guardians I’ve had were Ms. Weaver and Hordak, they were the shittest people I’ve known so I wouldn’t really call them parental guardians,  _ Catra looked up at the two women, who were waiting for an answer,  _ But I think I can trust them. _ The brunette smiled, “Yeah… that sounds actually nice.”

Spinnerella smiled, “You can even call us mom, if you want. But maybe not in a school setting,” she laughed. 

Netossa brought the three of them in a hug, “Spinny and I always wanted to have a family together!”

Catra slightly smiled,  _ Family… I like the sound of that.  _

  
  
  


“Is this shit recording?” Catra stared into the camera lenses that Dr. Lynn gave her, “Huh, I guess it is. Anyways, hi. This is Day One of ‘Catra’s Trauma Vlogs,’ that’s what I like to call them,” she laughed, “Anyways, today was okay, uh… I went to classes, saw my professors, ate with my friends and yeah,” she stared into the lenses, “Why am I saying all of this? I literally recorded it. Anyways, I didn’t really feel like killing myself a lot so I think that’s a plus. Uh… yeah.”

She cursed, “Fuck this is so awkward is this what YouTubers feel like all the time?” The brunette sighed, “Anyways, I’m bored and I’m in my bathroom,” she picked up something from behind the camera, “I got some scissors and I feel like cutting my hair. I can say some poetic shit about like because my life is changing and I want a new start. That's why I want to cut my hair. Y’know to symbolize some new start bullshit.” 

Catra laughed, “But I’d be lying, I just want to cut my hair because I saw a video with this really hot girl with short hair and I want to be her so-”

_ SNIP! _

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AHHHHH!!!! NETOSSA AND SPINNERELLA RADIATING MOM ENERGY UGH I LOVE THEM SO MUCH!! SHORT HAIRED CATRA? *CHEFS KISS* okay but i know catra said she wanted to cut her hair bc she saw a hot girl BUT like it actually DOES symbolize a fresh start and change and y'know yada yada. ANYWAYS HOMEGIRL IS GOING TO THERAPY IM SO EXCITED! BECAUSE CATRA'S ARC IS GOING TO ACTUALLY START (i planned it so like catra's healing is like her arc y'know and like the thing that happens before is like just information and build up WE HAD FUCKING 18 CHAPTERS OF BUILDUP HOLY SHIT!!!) ANYWAYS YUH THIS IS SO EXCITING IM SO PROUD OF HER STAN DR. LYNN EVEN THO SHE'S LOWKEY NOT RLLY DOING ANYTHING BUT WHATEVER. anyways hope you guys enjoyed this chapter and feel free to leave comments down below and like uhhh yuh have a good morning/afternoon/evening everyone! :)


	20. shattered harmony

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a glimpse of the super pal trio before they fell apart

_ About to walk out of the music department, Catra slung her bass guitar case over her shoulder and started to head back to the dorms to wallow in her own self pity. She felt a hand on her shoulder and turned around to see a tall, buff girl with a stylish platinum undercut, besides a shorter girl wearing long purple pigtails, who was staring at her tablet. “May I help you?” Catra said in a bitter tone. _

_ “Hi! Uh…” the girl awkwardly rubbed the back of her neck, “So we need another person for the group project and we were wondering if you wanted to join us?” _

_ Catra blinked. There was a group project? Well, she wouldn’t know she always slept during the lectures.  _

_ She stared at Catra, “Oh uh, I’m Scorpia by the way, and this is Entrapta.  _

_ “Catra,” the girl bluntly said, she looked over at Entrapta and noticed how the girl didn’t even take her eyes off of the screen. _

_ Scorpia grinned, “We’re minoring in music and just taking it as a hobby, and we heard you’re like really good at it so you wanna join our group?” _

_ The brunette sighed, “Why not.” _

_ Scorpia squealed with joy and brought Catra into a giant bear hug. The shorter girl tried to wrestle out of Scorpia’s grip, but damn was that girl strong, “I’m a hugger by the way.” _

_ “Yeah I can tell!” Catra grumbled, “Will you put me down now?” _

_ Apologizing, Scorpia put Catra down and she dusted her clothes, Scorpia nudged Entrapta, “Hey ‘Trapta, we need to exchange our numbers!”  _

_ Entrapta finally looked up from her screen and grinned, “Okie doke,” the trio quickly exchanged their numbers and Catra pushed her phone down her pocket again.  _

_ Scorpia clapped, “Well ‘Trapta and I best get going so just text the group chat whenever you’re ready to meet up!” _

_ Catra waved the two girls goodbye and she rolled her eyes as she headed the opposite direction to her dorm, “Fucking weirdos.” _

  
  
  


_ Leaning against the rooftops and blowing a puff of smoke into the air, Catra waited for Scorpia and Entrapta to come for their first practice together. The brunette frowned, “I don’t even know what fucking instruments they play… probably going to fail this project, but whatever I couldn’t care less,” the rooftop’s door swung open and Entrapta and Scorpia came up.  _

_ “Hey Catra!” Scorpia said in her usual upbeat tone. She watched as Catra didn’t say anything back and just blew another puff of smoke. _

_ Entrapta leaned closer to Catra, “You smoke? You know you shouldn’t smoke right, studies show that you’re slowly killing yourself as you smoke. I mean that’s basic knowledge!” _

_ Catra rolled her eyes and stepped on her cigarette, “Yeah, that’s the point Pigtails.” _

_ “Pigtails?” _

_ The girl shrugged, “Y’know like a nickname or some shit.” _

_ Gasping in glee, Entrapta took out her tablet and furiously typed on the keyboard, “The Catra has given me some sort of nickname! How fascinating! This is so exciting!”  _

_ Raising an eyebrow, Catra looked over at Scorpia, “What’s she doing?” _

_ Scorpia grinned, “STEM major, they always collect all sorts of information. At least that’s what Entrapta does,” the girl looked around the rooftops, “Are we practicing up here? There’s no drum set though.” _

_ Catra scoffed, “Well you guys didn’t tell me what fucking instrument you guys played! How the fuck was I supposed to know!” She grumbled.  _

_ “Oh that’s what we forgot!” Scorpia looked over at Entrapta who just giggled manically as she was still punching in data, “Anyways, I play the guitar and Entrapta just plays the drums. We’re still pretty beginner.” _

_ The brunette sighed and motioned to the bass case she was holding, “I play the bass. Anyways, we don’t have to practice today, let's just find a piece to play.” _

_ Scorpia nodded, “Good idea! You know, Professor Spinnerella is going to pick the top 5 groups and we can perform at the upcoming Battle of the Bands during the Spring Festival!” _

_ “Don’t care,” Catra uttered, she just wanted to get this stupid group assignment done and then hide away in her dorm forever. _

_ The girl shrugged, “That’s a shame, the winner of the Battle of the Bands gets a thousand bucks.” _

_ Catra’s eyes lit up at the sound of thousand bucks and she looked at Scorpia, “Well… if that’s the case, we’re going to win that fucking Battle of the Bands and get a thousand fucking bucks.” _

_ Scorpia gasped and picked Catra up in a bear hug, “Oh my god! Yes! This is going to be so exciting! I’ve always wanted to be in a band!” _

_ “Put. Me. Down,” Catra demanded. _

_ Apologizing again, the girl put Scorpia down and then wandered off to Entrapta to chat about how the three of them were going to win the Battle of the Bands. Catra slightly smiled at the two other girls, “They’re so fucking weird,” Catra muttered to herself, “But maybe… Being with them is better than being alone.” _

  
  
  


Dr. Lynn hummed as Catra was retelling her story about her friends, “Scorpia and Entrapta sound like wonderful friends.”

The brunette nodded, “They were a pain in the ass, but I enjoyed their company.”

  
  
  


_ Sitting on a bench outside of the cafeteria alone, Catra pulled out a cigarette to smoke but suddenly a hand stopped her from lighting it. She looked up and saw Scorpia and Entrapta grinning at her, well Entrapta’s face was buried in a tablet, per usual. “What the fuck?” _

_ “You should really stop smoking Wildcat,” Catra rolled her eyes at the ridiculous nickname Scorpia gave her, “It’s really bad for you,” she sat down next to the grumpy brunette. _

_ Catra crossed her arms, “Have you guys been practicing your part of the song for the group project? We’re going to be playing the same song for the assignment and the first round of the Battle of the Bands, so you guys better know your parts well.” _

_ The girl nodded, “Of course we are! I just know we’re going to get into the Battle of the Bands too! This is so exciting!” Catra grumbled in reply and was about to light her cigarette again, but Scorpia took action and grabbed the lighter and her pack of cigarettes away from her, “I don’t think so. I’m going to help you quit okay? It isn’t healthy.” _

_ “Ugh why don’t you just kill me instead?” Catra looked over at Scorpia who was giving her a hopeful smile, “Ugh fine! I’ll try to stop!”  _

_ Wrapping an arm around her, Scorpia smiled, “That’s the spirit Wildcat!” She looked up at Entrapta who was missing out on the group hug, “Hey ‘Trapta! Get in here!” _

_ “Okay,” she said, walking into the group hug. _

_ Scorpia gasped, “Oh man I just realized we don’t have a band or group name!” The girl thought for a while, “How about the Super Pal Trio! That’s a pretty catchy name don’t you guys think so?” _

_ “I like it!” Entrapta piped up. _

_ Catra scoffed, “Oh hell no! There’s no way that’s going to be our band name,” she rubbed her chin as she thought, “Uh… how about The Horde?” _

_ “I like it!” Entrapta repeated. _

_ “Then it’s settled,” Catra said, wiggling out of Scorpia’s arm, “We’ll join the Battle of the Bands as The Horde. Well if we make it.” _

_ Scorpia smiled, “I can work with that, but can the three of us be called the Super Pal Trio? Sorry I just can’t stop thinking about how genius that name is!” _

_ Rolling her eyes Catra sighed, “If I say yes will you finally shut up?”  _

_ “Yes.” _

_ The burnette sighed, “Okay then yes, we can be the Super Pal Trio.” Squealing in delight, Scorpia brought the three of them in a hug again and Catra groaned, “I hate it here.” _

  
  
  


Laughing, Dr. Lynn wrote down on her notes, “You three are adorable! I agree with Scorpia, Super Pal Trio is a cute name, don’t you think so Catra?”

Shrugging, Catra looked down on the floor, “Yeah I guess, anyways I got pretty close to Scorpia and Entrapta and we would always have lunch together and y’know just hang out and stuff. It was pretty fun I must admit, way better than being alone all the time. We made it to top 5 in our class and got into the Battle of the Bands, we were 5th place, but that’s besides the point,” the girl looked over at Dr. Lynn, who was nodding her head, “But y’know what they say, what goes up must come down. Because like always, I screwed everything up. 

  
  
  


_ Practicing in the storage room for the upcoming Battle of the Band, Catra played her bass and sang “Francis Forever,” by Mitski. _

_ I don’t know what to do without you _

_ I don’t know where to put my hands _

_ I’ve been trying to lay my head down _

_ But I’m writing this at 3 am _

_ I don’t need the world to see _

_ That I’ve been the best I can be, but _

_ I don’t think I could stand to be _

_ Where you don’t see me _

_ The girl abruptly stopped singing and stared at her two other bandmates, “Your rhythm is all over the place Entrapta,” she criticized, then turned to Scorpia, “You’re playing way too loud too, it’s overpowering everything!”  _

_ Hanging her head, Scorpia apologized, “Sorry, but we already performed this in class and made it into the top five groups, what’s the big deal? I’m sure we’ll do fine.” _

_ “We’re lucky we even made it to the top 5 groups in the class!” Catra snapped, “With the Battle of the Bands coming up, we better start taking our practice seriously!” Catra said. _

_ Scorpia and Entrapta exchanged a look and nodded. Catra sighed, “Whatever clean up the storage room I’m going outside for a smoke.”  _

_ The bigger girl frowned and whispered, “You said you were quitting.” _

_ Walking out the door, Catra scoffed, “Who the fuck are you to tell me what to do?” _

_ “I’m your friend,” Scorpia whispered.  _

  
  
  


_ Standing on the stage, lights beaming on them, Catra grabbed the microphone and smiled at the roaring crowd, “What’s up BMU?” The crowd cheered, “We’re The Horde and we’re going to be performing ‘Francis Forever’ by Mitski. Hope y’all enjoy the show!” She looked over her shoulder and nodded at Entrapta to start off the song with a strong beat.  _

_ Playing on her bass, she sang quietly into the microphone.  _

_ I don’t know what to do without you _

_ I don’t know where to put my hands _

_ I’ve been trying to lay my head down _

_ But I’m writing this at 3am _

_ I don’t need the world to see _

_ That i’ve been the best I can be, but _

_ I don’t think I could stand to be _

_ Where you don’t see me _

_ On sunny days I go out walking _

_ I end up on a tree-line street _

_ I look up at the gaps of sunlight _

_ I miss you more than anything _

_ I don’t need the world to see  _

_ That I’ve been the ebay I can be, but _

_ I don’t think I could stand to be _

_ Where you don’t see me  _

_ And autumn comes when you’re not done _

_ With the summer passing by, but _

_ I don’t think I could stand to be _

_ Where you don’t see me _

_ After performing their songs, the trio walked back into the backstage to put away their equipment, slightly hearing the next band performing on stage. Scorpia came over and hugged the two other girls, “Wow we did great! The crowd loved us!” _

_ Pushing the girl off of her, Catra scoffed, “Please, like the crowd knows anything about good music. Entrapta the beat was way off! I had so much trouble trying to keep up! We are probably going to be disqualified because you don’t know shit about anything!” she pointed at the purple haired girl.  _

_ Entrapta blinked at Catra, “I don’t understand why you’re so upset.” _

_ Laughing, Catra grabbed the girl by the collar, “Of course you don’t understand, you don’t understand anything! I won’t be surprised if you’re even human at all! All you seem to understand are your damn electronics that you can’t get your head out of!” _

_ Walking in between them, Scorpia looked down at Catra, “Wildcat, why are you so upset I don’t understand. We did great out there! You just need to believe in us that we’ll make it to the next round!” _

_ “Believe in you?” Catra parroted, “What a joke. Why would I believe in people who can’t do anything? I mean how hard is it to keep a steady rhythm? I mean how can someone possibly be this useless?”  _

_ Entrapta stared at Catra in shock and Scorpia hugged the girl who was close to tears. Scorpia towered over Catra, “Don’t talk to Entrapta that way!”  _

_ Feeling a bit intimidated, Catra stepped backwards. She had never seen Scorpia in this light before. Usually the girl was optimistic and sweet, but now Scorpia seemed intimidated and protective over Entrapta. The brunette rolled her eyes, “Oh yeah? What are you going to do about it? You need me to win this competition.” _

_ Scorpia glared at Catra, “No, we don’t. Entrapta and I are dropping out. Let’s go ‘Trapta,'' the two girls walked away and Scorpia looked back into Catra’s eyes, “You’re a bad friend.” _

  
  
  


Hands shaking, tears spewed out of Catra’s eyes, “Y-yeah… that’s what happened.”

Dr. Lynn put her notebook away, “Do you regret it?”

The brunette looked up at Dr. Lynn, “Before I thought it wasn’t my fault that they left and that stuff like that just happens,” her tears dropped on her hands, “But now, I regret it everyday.”

“Then why don’t you find them and apologize? What’s stopping you?”

Catra bit her lip, “I’m scared. What if they don’t want nothing to do with me? What if they already hate me? They probably won’t even look at me anymore. I was terrible to them.  _ I’m _ terrible.” 

The therapist placed her hand on Catra’s shoulder, “No Catra, you aren’t terrible. Not anymore at least,” the girl looked up at her, “You know how I know? Because you’re here, because you are trying to change and be better. The person that you were in the past is gone, you’re a new person now Catra. I won’t force you, but you should talk to your old friends again. There’s a chance that they won’t forgive you just yet, or at all for the matter, but if you at least apologize, maybe the regret won’t be so heavy on you.”

Looking up at Dr. Lynn, Catra sniffled, “I-I’ll try to talk to them.”

  
  
  


Humming a tune as she brushed her teeth, Scorpia smiled at her reflection, “Oh man I can’t wait to see my girlfriend again!” She gasped, “I can’t believe I have a girlfriend now!  _ Gosh… _ ” she swooned.

Scorpia changed out of her sleepwear and grabbed her backpack and walked out of her dorm room, about to head towards the direction of the library for a study date. “It’s been a year,” a voice said besides her. Scorpia looked over to her left and saw an old friend leaning against the wall as she looked at the ground. The girl looked up at her, “Hey Scorpia.”

Her eyes grew wide, 

  
“ _ Catra _ !” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so yeah stan protective scorpia she's loyal to the end!!! oh and just to like make thing clear scorpia knew entrapta before catra that's why she's more like protective of entrapta, but she still cares about catra just a bit more entrapta bc she new her longer if that makes sense. anyways yeah so that's what happened to the super pal trio but hey they might make up and get the gang back together. anyways catra was a big meanie in the past but hey homegirl is growing now so yuh season 5 things LMFAO. anyways yeah uh next chapter will something! we getta see more scorpia and entrapta YAYYYYYYY i miss them. anyways so hope you guys enjoyed today's chapter feel free to comment your opinion and yuh hope you guys have a good morning/afternoon/evening :)


	21. dude we're getting the band back together!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> catra reconnects with scorpia

“Day Ten of ‘Catra’s Trauma Vlogs,’” the girl took a deep breath, “Wel uh… today I’m going to talk to my old friends and apologize to them for all of the shitty things I did. I don’t know what’s going to happen, but Dr. Lynn just told me to try, so here I am. I’m trying,” Catra scratched the back of her neck, “Well uh… I’ll tell you how it went,” she then turned the camera off.

  
  
  


This was probably a bad idea, but whatever Catra wanted to try to make things right. Walking over to Scorpia’s dorm building, the girl stared at the door and was about to knock on it, but stopped herself quickly. “Fuck why am I so nervous?” Catra whispered to herself, “I’ll just wait for her,” the girl leaned against the wall and felt butterflies flutter in her stomach, “Fuck I don’t even know if she’s here.”

After waiting a couple of minutes outside of Scorpia’s dorm room, Catra was about to leave but heard the door knob turn, she leaned back against the wall and saw Scorpia step out of the room. “It’s been a year,” she looked up at a surprised Scorpia, “Hey Scorpia.”

“Catra!” Scorpia exclaimed, the brunette turned and faced Scorpia, “Oh my god…” Catra waited for the worst to happen, Scorpia to slap her, yell at her, or just walk away. The girl looked up at Scorpia who gasped, “You cut your hair!”

Raising an eyebrow, Catra stared at her in disbelief, “Huh?”

The girl circled Catra and smiled, “Wow! You look  _ great _ ! Did you cut it yourself? It really suits you!” 

“W-what?” Catra said, “Okay Scorpia!” She yelled firmly to get the girl’s attention, “That’s not the point I’m here! Uh… can we talk? Now?”

Scorpia nodded, “It’ll be nice to catch up a bit,” she smiled at Catra, who let out a sigh of relief. So far things are going well.

  
  
  


Sitting at the campus cafe, Catra looked around the cafe as she sipped her iced coffee.  _ Why’s there so many fucking people?  _ She thought. The girl looked back at Scorpia who was staring right at her, “Uh… what?”

Breaking out of the peculiar trance she was in Scorpia laughed, “S-sorry I can’t get over your hair!” She said sheepishly.

Groaning, Catra growled, “Ugh! Enough about my hair! I was bored okay and a bit mentally unstable. But that’s besides the point!” She took a calming deep breath, like what Dr. Lynn advised her to do, and exhaled, “Okay… I wanted to say, I’m sorry,” Scorpia blinked in surprise, “I know it’s a bit too late for me to apologize for what a shitty person I was before, but I’m not asking you to forgive me. I just… want to put it out that I’m learning to change and I want to do better. I’m really sorry Scorpia for everything. I was a shitty person and a more shitty friend.”

“I was just so focused on winning that stupid competiton so I could get some money, but… I lost importance on what really mattered,” she looked into Scorpia’s eyes, “my friends. You and Entrapta were having so much fun but I just ruined it. Like everything… I was rude to Entrapta and you were just being a good friend and defending her. I’m really sorry, again I’m not asking for your forgiveness I just… want to show you that I’m trying to change and I want to make things right.”

Scorpia smiled softly at the girl, “It’s okay. I understand,” Catra looked up at her, “I… can’t say I can forgive you just yet, what you did really pained Entrapta and I, but I do want to give you another chance. Believe it not, I really missed you Wildcat,” Catra smiled at the old nickname and tears trickled down her face.

Catra sniffled, “I missed you too. I’m sorry, I’m  _ so _ sorry. Thank you so much for giving me another chance I’ll do better I promise.” 

Placing a hand on Catra’s shoulder, Scorpia nodded, “I know you will, I can tell you’re trying since you came to me,” the brunette nodded and shakily sipped her iced coffee again to calm her down a bit and Scorpia leaned back in her chair, “Are you going to talk to Entrapta?”

“That’s the plan,” Catra said, wiping her tears, “But she’s a bit harder to get ahold of, do you know her schedule?”

Scorpia took out her phone and looked at the time, “Uh… I think she’s still in the STEM building right now. I mean she practically lives there, I’ve never seen her go back to her dorm before,” she laughed.

The brunette hummed, “Okay I’ll go there later,” Scorpia’s phone lit up with a notification and the girl saw that there was a text message from the contact, “girlfriend <3.” Catra blinked, “Are you seeing someone right now Scorpia?”

Quickly covering her phone screen, Scorpia laughed nervously, “Uh… maybe?”

“Come on spill! Who is it?” Catra said curiously.

Knowing that there’s no way out of this conversation, Scorpia sighed, “It’s uh… Perfuma,” she scratched her cheek nervously. 

Gasping, Catra leaned forward, “No way! The hippie girl who probably sells edibles?”

“Hey!”

Shrugging, the brunette rolled her eyes playfully, “You can’t tell me otherwise that she gives off those vibes,” Scorpia thought for a minute then agreed that Catra was right, “Anyways… I’m happy for you, you two really suit each other. She’s always been into buff girls, I mean she had googly eyes for Coach Huntara. But I think your sweet personality suits her better,” Catra punched Scorpia’s shoulder, “Who would have thought, you’re such a heartthrob.” 

Blushing, Scorpia nodded, “Yeah, I really like her, she’s so sweet and nice and pretty. Ah! She’s practically perfect!”

Catra smiled at her bashful friend, “Go see what she texted you!”

Opening her phone and quickly scanning over the text, Scorpia suddenly stood up, “I have to go!”

“What?”

Taking her bag and slapping money to pay for the drinks on the table, Scorpia looked at Catra, “I totally forgot about our study date today! It was nice seeing you again and yeah good luck with talking to Entrapta! I’ll see you later bye!” Catra watched in amusement as Scorpia tripped on a pebble as she ran to the library.

The girl finished her iced coffee, “I think this went pretty well,” she smiled to herself, “She’ll see me later huh?” 

  
  
  


After taking a little mental break, Catra walked over to the STEM building and searched for Entrapta. “Why is this department so fucking big,” Catra grumbled to herself as she peaked into every room that had its door open. Just then, the girl heard a familiar cackle coming from the second floor. “Okay that  _ has _ to be her!”

Running up the stairs, Catra followed the sound of the high pitched voice and opened the door, revealing Entrapta talking to her tablet. “Alright Emily I need you to-” she looked up and stared at Catra, “Oh hi Catra!” 

“Hey Entrapta…” Catra said awkwardly. 

Ignoring the question, Entrapta popped next to Catra and stared at her haircut, “You cut your hair! How fascinating! Emily, go write that down in my notes that is labeled ‘Catra,’ this is an important discovery!”

Tugging at her short fringe, Catra muttered, “I just cut it, what’s the big deal?” She looked up, “Um, are you on FaceTime with someone?” 

Entrapta hummed, “Why would I be?”

“Then who’s-”

The STEM major skipped over to her tablet and showed it to Catra, “Emily is a program that I coded and added to my iPad! Isn’t she just adorable?” The girl squealed.

Catra blinks through the tears that were forming in the corner of her eyes, “Uh… she’s something,” she took a deep breath, “Anyways… I just wanted to say that I’m sorry. I’m not asking for your forgiv-”

“I forgive you,” Entrapta said, patting Catra’s head. 

The brunette wiped the tears in her eyes, “W-wait what? No! Aren’t you mad at me? How can you just forgive me like that? Don’t you remember what I did? Don’t you remember the horrible things I said to you?”

The shorter girl walked away and started to clean up a bit of her lab equipment that was scattered around the place, “I don’t recall… do you mind jogging my memory?”

Shutting her eyes, Catra muttered, “I told you that you don’t know anything human and that you only care about your electronics and robots,” her voice trembled as she recalled the awful things that she said, “I said that I wouldn’t be surprised if you weren’t even human. Since I got upset that… you couldn’t understand emotion.”

Entrapta stopped rummaging around her equipment, “Oh… I remember,” she turned to her tablet, “Emily, pull up Catra’s data,” as Catra shook where she stood, Entrapta scrolled through the notes that she jotted down a year ago, “It’s all here.”

Collapsing, Catra went into the child’s pose in front of Entrapta, “I’m sorry!” She sobbed, “I’m sorry I’m such a shitty person! It was wrong of me to say all of those awful things to you! I’m sorry!”

Catra felt Entrapta hold her hand and helped her stand up, “I told you, I forgive you,” Entrapta smiled.

“ _ W-why _ ?” Catra choked out, “How could you forgive me so easily? I was awful to you!”

The purple hair girl shrugged, “Technically you weren’t wrong. I don’t understand emotions well, if I do at all. What you said before… hurt me, I think that’s the word. I don’t understand emotions well ” Entrapta repeated, “But,” she looked down at Catra and smiled, “I can tell you are sincere about your apology so therefore I forgive you.”

“Thank you…” Catra breathed out, “So much, for forgiving me. I won’t make you regret it!” There was a warm fuzzy feeling that fluttered in Catra’s heart, it felt nice. 

Entrapta smiled, “Do you want to see how I made Emily?”

“Of course I do,” Catra nodded.

  
  
  


Turning on the camera, Catra cleared her throat, “Day Thirteen of ‘Catra’s Trauma Vlogs,’ today I’m-”

“That is a  _ really _ old camera!” A voice interrupted, “May I see?”

There was a clear look of annoyance on Catra’s face that the camera showed. Another voice interrupted, “Entrapta, let’s not bother Wildcat, her doctor told her to do this. It’s important.”

Rolling her eyes, Catra just turned her camera towards her friends, “Say hi to my therapist dinguses,” the two girls smiled at the camera before Catra turned it back to herself, “Yeah that’s Entrapta and Scorpia, we made up a few days ago and this is our first hangout that we had together in a while."

Her friends came to Catra’s side and Scorpia grinned at the camera, “It’s a Super Pal Trio hang out!” The girl looked over at Catra, “You still like that name right?”

“Of course I do,” Catra said, slightly smiling, “I like being back in the Super Pal Trio.”

Scorpia gasped at the positivity coming from Catra and brought all three of them into one giant group hug. Quickly turning off the camera and putting it aside, Catra sunk into Scorpia and Entrapa’s embrace.  _ Wow,  _ Catra thought,

_ I didn’t know how much I missed these hugs. _

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YAYYY SUPER PAL TRIO!!! THEY ARE SO CUTE I LOVE THEM SO MUCH!! they still have some issues but other than that they are back together! the "band" is back together YAYYYYY anyways yeah the trauma vlogs are so fun to make lol anyways i wanted to like make entrapta forgive catra quicker bc like she did that in the show she was just like "i forgive you" lol so yeah i wanted to make it similar to that and yuh. hope you guys enjoyed today's chapter and feel free to comment down below and yeah hope you guys have a good morning/afternoon/evening!


	22. quality time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> catra spending time with her family and friends

Packing up her bags after an art lecture, Catra walked down to Netossa, “Hey mom,” she said casually. After the whole unofficial adopted family talk, the girl has actually gotten pretty close to her and Spinnerella.

“Hey kid,” Netossa said, “I’m going to grab some lunch off campus with Spinny, wanna come?” 

Shrugging, Catra agreed and walked alongside the woman towards the car and they started to drive away from the college. Connecting the aux cord to her phone, the brunette started to blast some of her rock music in the car. “Where we going?” 

Netossa hummed along to the music, “Just some kebab place, it’s pretty good I think you’ll like it.”

“Yeah I think I will. I mean I’ll eat anything right now, I’m starving,” Catra groaned.

The woman glanced at Catra, “Did you eat yesterday?”

Catra laughed nervously, she knew how Netossa and Spinnerella could get about her health and nutrition, “Um… no I skipped lunch and dinner yesterday,” she could feel Netossa radiate her mom energy, “B-but I did get a few snacks in and drank water! Well… it was juice.”

Stopping at the red light, Netossa turned to Catra, “You little punk, why didn’t you eat? You know that isn’t good for you. You’re lucky that you’re talking to me about it. Spinny would rage if she found out you haven’t been eating.”

The brunette chuckled, for an odd reason she didn’t mind getting lectured by Netossa or Spinnerella. Since, it really showed that they cared y’know? Ms. Weaver would lecture Catra but because of the weirdest things and punish her, Hordak wouldn’t even bat an eye if Catra did anything, but Spinnerella and Netossa? Catra could really tell that they cared about her. 

“Okay in my defense,” Catra spoke up, “I was busy doing your art project that was due today! It was pretty stressful not gonna lie.”

Netossa parked her car in front of a small restaurant, “Okay  _ first _ , I assigned that like a week ago so that just means you were procrastinating,” Catra shrugged, Netossa wasn’t wrong, “And second, we’re here and I’m going to make sure you eat up!”

The two girls walked out of the car and inside of the restaurant, where they saw Spinnerella waiting for the two girls at a booth, “Hello Dear! Hello Catra!” Netossa giddily ran to her wife’s side and kissed her cheek.

“Did you wait long?” Netossa said, sitting besides her wife, while Catra sat across from the couple.

Spinnerella hummed, “Not really just 10 minutes or so,” she turned to Catra, “How are you doing sweetie I haven’t seen you since Wednesday!”

Turning away, Catra muttered, “That was only like two days ago…” she then smiled, “But I’m doing pretty good. I’m hanging out with Entrapta and Scorpia again tonight. We’re going to play boardgames,” the girl laughed, “We just got closer again and now we’re probably going to ruin our friendship.”

“Why’s that?”

“We’re playing Monopoly,” Catra said. The two women nodded their heads in agreement.

Handing Catra a menu, Netossa also reached out and messed up Catra’s hair, “I still can’t get over how handsome you look now! The short hair really suits you!”

Blushing, the brunette pushed Netossa’s hand away, “Stop it mom! You’re embarrassing me! It’s just hair… it’ll grow back,” she muttered. 

The woman sniffled, “I still can’t get over you calling me mom! It’s just so… sweet!” Netossa hugged Spinnerella.

“There, there,” Spinnerella said, patting her wife’s back.

Catra pursed her lips together, “I just called you mom like a few minutes ago…” 

After Netossa calmed down, they ordered their dishes, which came out surprisingly quickly, and talked as they ate their food. “So, how have your vlogs been?” Spinnerella asked, scooping a spoonful of broken rice in her mouth.

“They’ve been good, I’ve been slowly improving, at least according to Dr. Lynn,” Catra said, “I think she’s going to check my videos again in the next session I have I think in… uh, 2 days or so.”

The three of them talked about school, the future, and just regular conversations, like what a family would have. Catra smiled at the couple, though it was unofficial, she really liked her moms. It really felt like they were a real family. 

  
  
  
  


Catra turned on her camera, “Day Seventeen of ‘Catra’s Trauma Vlogs,’” she said, propping up her camera on her drawer, “Today Scorpia and Entrapta and going to be coming over to play Monopoly, things are probably going to get crazy, so I’m going to clean up my room a bit.” She grabbed her phone to open up her Spotify, which played, “Don’t Know How,” by Ricky Montgomery. Keeping the camera on, the girl zoomed around her dorm room, shoving different miscellaneous items into random drawers in her room.

Multitasking, she quietly sang the lyrics as she vacuumed her floor.

_ I wanna be the one that makes you stay _

_ I wanna be a name that you can’t say _

_ I wanna do it but I don’t know _

_ I don’t know how _

_ I wanna be a word you say at night _

_ I wanna be a feeling you can’t fight  _

_ I wanna do it but I don’t know _

_ I don’t know how  _

_ Lovemaker, but no one knows if you’re a  _

_ A heartbreaker, but you can’t say if you’re a  _

_ A life taker, ‘cause you can’t tell if you’re not _

After cleaning around her dorm for a bit, Catra shut off the camera and turned off her music, to just relax on the bed, “My Spotify knows what’s up. It always knows what song I’m in the mood in and what lyrics I want to relate to,” she groaned, “This one is a bit  _ too _ relatable. Now I’m stressing out. How do I tell her?” 

  
  
  


Opening the door for her friends to come in, Scorpia hugged Catra, “Hey Wildcat! How have you been? We felt like we haven’t seen each other in forever!” The girl exclaimed loudly.

Catra rolled her eyes playfully, “Scorpia I swear to god, we literally saw each other yesterday,” the girl blinked at her, “We got coffee yesterday remember?”

The girl clapped her hands together, “Oh yeah… Sorry I couldn't’ remember I was zooted last night. Perfuma gave me an edible.” 

The brunette stared at her friend and laughed, “I  _ told _ you she gives off weed vibes! She’s a hippie for fuck’s sake!”

The two girls walked in and Scorpia sat down next to Entrapta, who’s eyes were glued onto her tablet, “Well… you are always right,” she smiled, “Anyways, let’s just play Monopoly already, Entrapta get off of the tablet. This is quality Super Pal Trio time!”

Entrapta put down her tablet as she was said to do, “Emily make sure your recorder is on,” she looked over at Scorpia and Catra’s confused faces, “What? Just in case something interesting happens. Data is data okay?”

Catra took out the board game and set it up. She smirked, “Get ready to get your asses whooped in Monopoly. I’m a total shark in this game.”

Shaking her head while she clicked her tongue, Scorpia grinned, “I don’t think so Wildcat. I might not be the brightest one here, but I can say that I am a mastermind in this game!”

“Emily what is the best way to win Monopoly?” Entrapta asked.

Turning her head to Entrapta, Catra crossed her arms, “Hey ‘Trapta, that’s cheating. You can’t use your supercomputer for this game. You’re already a genius aren’t you?”

The purple haired girl gasped loudly, “Hm… I’m not really a genius. But-”

“Let’s just start the game!” Catra shouted impatiently.

  
  
  
  


Walking into her dorm room, Adora was carrying a bag of pastries from the bakery downtown called Dryl, “Hey Glimmer, I got some stuff for you! I went to the bakery you mentioned before and it’s pretty great. Almost everything is like super tiny but hella expensive though.”

Looking up from her phone, Glimmer grinned, “Ooh! Two cakes? So one for me one for you?” 

The blonde placed the bags on a table, “Nope. The mango one is ours and I’m going to give the strawberry one over to Catra later today,” Glimmer raised an eyebrow, “She mentioned before that she liked strawberry flavored things and I saw the cake,” the girl started to blush, “uh, it was on sale and it reminded me of her. Yeah, so I got it!” 

“Simp.”

Adora rolled her eyes, “Shut up, I’m just being thoughtful okay?” She dug her phone from her pocket and texted Catra, “There, I mentioned that I would be coming in like an hour,” the girl walked over to her bed and collapsed on it.

Glimmer sighed, “When are you guys going to get together anyways? Don’t you guys like each other?”

“Yeah… I don’t know, I know we both like each other,” Adora said, “We mutually agreed we should focus on ourselves first before we get together, since we were in a pretty dark place at the time. But we said that a while ago, what if she doesn’t have any feelings for me anymore?” the blonde groaned, “That would be really bad because… I think I love her now.” 

The other girl instantly rose from her bed when she heard that, “Shut up!” Glimmer said, surprised, “You love her now? Are you sure?”

“Positive.”

  
  
  


Frowning, Catra crossed her arms, “This is so fucking stupid I hate it here,” She grumbled into the corner of her room. The girl turned around to Scorpia and Entrapta who were still sitting around the Monopoly board, “Why do I have to stand here?”

Scorpia turned around and twirled her finger, “Because you’re in jail Catra. Now turn around!”

The brunette yelled, “This isn’t part of the rules!”

Entrapta rolled the dice and moved her figure up 5 spaces, “Hey I can visit the jail! Scorpia what does that mean? This is so intriguing.”

The girl hummed, “Just go and say hi to Catra and come back.”

Prancing over to the corner of the room, Entrapta tapped on Catra’s shoulder, “Hey Catra! How’s jail life?” The angry girl turned around and gave Entrapta a death stare, “Well… goodbye!” She quickly pranced back to Scorpia and grabbed her tablet, “Emily did you get all of that down?”

Scorpia snorted and took a picture of an angry Catra standing in the corner.

“Delete that right now!” 

  
  
  


Walking over to Catra’s dorm, holding the strawberry cake and other baked goods, Adora spoke to herself, “Hopefully she saw my message, I don’t know she didn’t reply. I hope she likes these, even if it’s nothing much.” She walked up the stairs of the dorm building and distinctly heard yelling coming from the room, “What the-” she knocked on the door and Entrapta opened it for her.

“Oh, hello Adora!” The girl said happily.

Smiling back at her friend, Adora said, “Hey Entrapta, mind if I come in? I have some stuff for Catra,” Entrapta nodded her head and let the girl in, where she saw Scorpia and Catra yelling at each other. 

Scorpia took a deep breath, “Catra,” she said as calmly as she could, “You landed on the jail spot. So go back in your corner!”

“No!” Catra yelled, “I’ve been there for too long! I’ve  _ seen _ things Scorpia! You can’t make me go back in there over my dead body-” she turned head to the door and saw Adora standing there, her mouth gaped open in shock, “Hey Adora,” Catra purred. 

“H-hey Catra?” Adora said awkwardly, “I texted you that I was coming over with some pastries. Didn’t you see it?” 

The girl shook her head, “Nope, because  _ someone _ ,” she glared at Scorpia, though there was no real heat behind it, “kept making me go to jail and I want to live a free woman!”

Scorpia sighed, “That’s the game Wildcat!”

Ignoring Scorpia, Catra walked over to Adora and peeked into the bag that she brought, “Strawberry cake!” She turned to Adora, “That’s my favorite! How’d you know?”

Turning her head away from Catra, Adora blushed, “Uh, you told me awhile ago that you liked it and I just remembered I guess…” The blonde looked how happy Catra was as she rummaged through the assortments of pastries. Adora smiled, “Well uh, I have to go, I just wanted to stop by and give you stuff,” walking out of the door, Adora waved one last goodbye, “See you guys, have fun at Monopoly!”

After Adora left, Scorpia turned to Catra, “Yeah Wildcat, let’s continue playing.”

“Hell no,” Catra said, holding an egg tart, “Let’s just say Entrapta wins.”

The purple haired girl grinned, “I won? Oh this is so exciting! Emily! Write that down!”

Taking a bite out of her egg tart, Catra’s eyes lit up, “This is so good, oh my god. Do you guys want some? There’s a lot of different stuff in there,” Scorpia and Entrapta exchanged a look but agreed to take some of the pastries.

As the Super Pal Trio all ate their baked goods, Scorpia nudged Catra, “So… is there something between you and Adora that you didn’t tell me about?”

“What? Of course not,” Catra said, with her mouth full.

Scorpia smiled, “Come on Wildcat don’t lie to me! I saw the way you two looked at each other! That was just  _ adorable _ !” The girl gasped, “I just made a pun! Did you hear that? I’m so funny!”

Eating a tiny cupcake, Entrapta looked through her tablet, “The data that I have on the Catra and the Adora, says that their personalities are 96 compatible with each other,” the brunette rolled her eyes and just focused on her food, “So it is likely that they should have something between each other. I mean that is only logical is it not?”

Getting slowly agitated, Catra threw her garbage away, “Guys seriously, there’s nothing between me and Adora!” She thought to herself, 

_ At least, not yet. _

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so... is catra going to be asking adora out soon? i mean... i know that answer haha anyways yeah this chapter was just like a "filler" ish one y'know just to see catra's relationship with her other special people in her life which is great i love spinnerella and netossa and the super pal trio. they are just great. anyways so yeah catra saying that playing monopoly will "tear" the super pal trio apart is HILARIOUS at least to me i mean my humor is also broken so whatever. i love netossa and spinerella's mom energy like netossa was so worried (and lowkey aggressive) when catra told her that she skipped meals. ahhh i love netossa she's so like protective of catra. we'll see more spinnerella and catra moments later though i promise!!!! adora giving catra a cake bc she knows it's her favorite AND ADORA TELLING GLIMMER THAT SHE LOVES CATRA NOW UGHHHH I LOVE HER SO MUCH. anyways yeah so this was just like a sweet chapter and yuh so i hope you guys enjoyed today's chapter and feel free to leave a comment down below and i hope you guys have a good morning/afternoon/evening! :)


	23. reborn tonight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> catra learns to love herself

Sitting on the couch in Dr. Lynn’s office, Catra was silent as her therapist was taking notes for her. Dr. Lynn stood up and Catra followed, “Well Catra, looks like everything is going well with you. You have been really improving, at least that’s what I’ve been getting from your ‘trauma vlogs.’ I told you that you were a strong girl and you could get through all of this,” Catra blushed at the compliment and Dr. Lynn placed her clipboard down, “Now then, do you have any questions? If not we can just end today’s session.”

Catra thought to herself,  _ Well I have a lot of questions. Am I ready to be in a relationship now? How do you know the difference between like and love? Am I even capable of loving?  _ She looked up at Dr. Lynn who was waiting for an answer,  _ Should I really be talking about relationship stuff to my therapist though…?  _ Spinnerella and Netossa came through her mind,  _ I think I should ask them instead.  _

“Uh… I think I’m good,” Catra smiled, “I’ll uh, see you later!” She waved goodbye to the doctor and walked out of the office and to her car. Leaning her body against the steering wheel Catra sighed, “I  _ really _ want to tell her…”

  
  
  


Though Catra really cared for Netossa and Spinnerella, their lectures were so fucking boring. After it felt like an eternity of Netossa’s charcoal art lecture, Catra walked over to the woman when the other college students left, “Hey mom… I uh, have a question.”

Packing up her bags, Netossa smiled at Catra, “What’s up kiddo.”

“Uh… how do you know,” her face started to heat up, fuck this was embarressing, “uh… the difference between like and love?” 

The woman grinned at her, “Oh my stars! Catra do you love Adora?!”

The brunette blushed even harder, “Mom!” 

“Okay, okay, calm down,” Netossa joked. She then rubbed her chin, “Hm… well to put it short, when you like someone, it’s more of a tender feeling towards that one special someone and you enjoy being around them. But to love… uh, it includes deeper, stronger emotions. It’s not just you enjoy being around them, they mean  _ everything _ to you. It’s a bit confusing to be honest.”

Catra rubbed the back of her neck, “Mom… am I, uh… capable of loving?”

Netossa blinked, “What? Of course you ar-” The woman stopped herself from talking anymore, “Catra, do you love yourself?”

The girl bit her lip, “I uh… don’t know.”

“Before did you love yourself?”

“No,” Catra said, “I wanted to die before, I don’t really want to die now though.”

“Why is that?”

The brunette took a deep breath, “I wanted to die before because I thought I lost everything. My will to play or listen to music, art,  _ Adora _ . That’s why I wanted to end it all,” Catra looked down at her hands, which were slightly shaking, “But now… I don’t know if I love myself, but I don’t want to kill myself. That’s because if I die, I won’t be able to remember anyone. You, Spinnerella, Scorpia, Entrapta, Adora, and even Glimmer. If I die I lose all of that. But I’m not sure if I love myself.”

Netossa ruffled Catra’s short hair, “That’s okay. I’m no therapist, but you should ask Dr. Lynn about self love, because once you love yourself, it’s easier to know if you love others. At least, that’s what I think,” the woman chuckled, “Again I’m no therapist.”

Catra nodded, “I’ll try.”

Turning on the camera, Catra stared into the lenses, “Hello, this is Day Twenty Five of ‘Catra’s Trauma Vlogs,’” the girl rubbed the back of her neck, “Yesterday my mom, Netossa, talked to me about the differences of like and love, because I really like this girl. And uh, I’m not sure if I’m even capable of loving but Netossa said that if I learn how to love myself, I am also capable of loving others. So tomorrow at my session with Dr. Lynn, I’ll ask her about that. Yeah, wish me luck,” then the screen went black.

  
  
  


Sitting back on the couch in Dr. Lynn’s office, Catra twiddled with her thumbs, “Dr. Lynn?” The woman looked up at her, “Uh… how do I love myself?” 

“That’s a great question Catra,” Dr. Lynn said, “Throughout the many sessions that we’ve had together, we’ve been practicing self love, even if you weren’t aware of it. We did vlogs to check in on your daily life and throughout that, I’ve noted that you’ve been improving. You’ve talked with your old friends and you apologized while they forgave you. But the important thing is, do you forgive yourself?” 

She blinked, “Uh… I don’t know. I  _ don’t _ know! Sometimes I feel happy sometimes I don’t! Sometimes I feel guilty that I did all of those things in the first place!” Tears started to poke out of her eyes, “Yes my friends forgave me and care about me greatly, but to me that just shows that I was just a shitty person and that I don’t deserve my wonderful friends who’ve been by my side no matter how awful I was!”

Dr. Lynn placed a hand on Catra, “Was, Catra.  _ Was _ ,” the brunette looked up at her, teary eyed, “You  _ were _ a bad person. Were as in  _ past _ tense. All of that happened in the past. Maybe you can’t forget about it, but you can grow from it and just embrace who you are now. Now that you have grown. Be proud of yourself for where you are now! You are a different person than who you were a few weeks ago! You are a different person than who you were a  _ year _ ago! You are strong, look how much you have grown Catra! Now answer me again, do you forgive yourself?”

_ She’s right,  _ Catra thought,  _ I have grown. I’ve been too focused on the past and the mistakes I’ve made that I forgot where I stood now and how many mistakes I’ve mended. I’m a different person. I’m a better person.  _ The girl wiped her tears away and took a deep breath, “Yeah,” she breathed out, “I- I do forgive myself.”

The woman placed a hand on Catra’s shoulders and smiled proudly at her, “Then there you go. If you can forgive yourself, you can love yourself. Congratulations Catra, you’ve learned self love.”

  
  
  


“Day Thirty of ‘Catra’s Trauma Vlogs,’” Catra said into the camera, “So uh… a few days ago I learned about self love and it’s honestly… pretty great I feel really uh… light. If that even makes sense. Anyways, I’m going to meet with Spinnerella and we’re going to get some lunch together. Netossa is busy so it’ll just be the two of us. I’m not mad though, because I want to ask Spinnerella how to ask Adora out and I just know Netossa would freak out about it if I tell her in person.”

She scratched her head, “Uh so yeah, logging off now.”

  
  
  


Waiting at a cafe off campus, Catra spotted Spinnerella getting out of her car and towards the building. The woman walked over to the table and sat across from Catra, “Hey darling, so what’s going on?”

Catra rubbed the back of her neck, “Uh, I just wanted to say that I think I love Adora and I want to ask her out!” She said quickly, her face burning up.

Spinnerella gasped in surprise, “That is so cute! You love her?”

“Yeah… I think I have for a while but I just didn’t realize it,” Catra chuckled, “But I decided to suck it up and just ask her. I hope she still likes me.”

“What do you mean  _ still _ ?”

The brunette sighed, “Well back when… that happened and she saved me. We confessed that we both liked each other but we shouldn’t be in a relationship yet because we should just focus on ourselves,” she leaned back in her chair, “But that was like a while ago, what if she doesn’t like me anymore? What if I freak her out by saying that I love her? I  _ really _ want to do this right mom, I  _ really _ care for Adora and I want to be in her life.”

The woman sniffled and wiped her tears. Catra blinked, “Were you tearing up?”

She nodded, “Y-yeah, it’s just so sweet. You’ve grown so much Catra. You don’t understand how happy I feel, You learned to love yourself and now you realized you love Adora,” she sniffled again, “It’s every mother’s dream!”

Catra laughed awkwardly, “You’re so embarrassing mom,” she cleared her throat, “Anyways, how should I ask her out? I really want to make this special so can you help me? I feel like you’re more responsible than Netossa.”

“Well you aren’t wrong,” Spinnerella shrugged, “Don’t tell your mom this, but Netossa can be a bit of a handful sometimes,” the woman looked at the menu that was written on the wall, “I think we should order first and then talk about your plan.”

“Sounds like a plan.”

  
  
  


Adora groaned into her pillow, “Glimmer I don’t know what to fucking do!”

“Surprising,” the girl said in a sarcastic voice.

The blonde looked at her roommate and frowned, “Not funny Glimmer! I actually don’t know what to fucking do! I miss her so much Glimmer and we’re not even together!”

Glimmer scrolled through her phone, “Just ask her out dumbass it can’t be that hard right?”

“It  _ is _ that hard Glimmer!” Adora said, “I don’t if she’s ready yet! We haven’t really spoken in a while because she’s been busy with therapy and healing! Which I’m  _ really _ proud of by the way, don’t get me wrong! It really shows that she’s trying to be better and I love her for that!” She clasped a hand over her mouth, “Oh my god, I used the L word again…”

“What a tragedy,” Glimmer said, “If you love her, you love her.”

Adora snapped her finger, “Y’know what, you’re right. I love her. And I don’t care about it. I fucking love her! I love her! I lov-” a pillow smacked into Adora’s face, she turned to Glimmer and raised an eyebrow, “What was that for?”

Her roommate shrugged, “You were being too loud.” The blonde rolled her eyes and lied down on her bed to just scroll through her phone for the next 10 minutes. 

While the two girls were silently just going on their phones, there was a loud knock on the door. Adora stood up and opened it, there was no one there. She looked through the hallways. Again, no one there. She looked at the door and there was a note attached to it. 

“Who’s there?” Glimmer asked from her bed.

Taking the note, Adora shrugged, “Just this note,” she opened the note and read it.

_ Hey Adora, _

_ I need to talk to you about something. It’s important. Meet me at the library rooftop in an hour. Don’t you dare be late. _

_ -Catra _

Butterflies fluttered in Adora’s stomach, she couldn’t tell if they were good butterflies or bad butterflies. Because the last time Adora got a letter from Catra… the  _ incident _ happened. Adora bit her lip, she couldn’t go to the rooftops now though, Catra told her in an hour to. So in an hour she will go.

  
  
  
  


After changing and 50 minutes passed, Adora was sprinting to the rooftops. Though it was unlikely, Adora prayed that nothing bad would happen to Catra. She sped walked through the library and up to the rooftops. The girl took a deep breath before opening the door to prepare for the worse. 

She opened the door and got on the rooftops, “Catra!” Adora yelled, she frantically looked around the rooftop and saw fairy lights, scattered rose petals, and Catra wearing a suit, looking better then ever as she was holding a beautiful bouquet of flowers.

“Sheesh…” Catra said, standing a few feet away from Adora, “There was no need to yell…”

Adora stared at Catra, “C-Catra…”

The brunette put on her signature smirk,

“Hey Adora.”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> omg omg catra is going to officially ask her out!!! im not screaming you are! okay but we STAN netossa and dr. lynn in this house like look that them giving catra the advice she needs, well it IS dr. lynn's job but whatever, her advice was *chef's kiss* okay and like there are like DAYS between all of these moments in the chapter i think it was 5 days between the therapy session and catra talking about how she wants to ask adora out just remember that lol. anyways, next chapter is gonna be sweet we're finally gonna see these dorks together and adora is gonna have a major lesbian panic haha it's gonna be so funny. anyways hope you guys enjoyed today's chapter feel free to leave a comment down below and i hope you all have a good morning/afternoon/evening! :)


	24. i swear to god, i never fall in love, then you showed up and i can't get enough of it

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the time has finally come, catra asks adora out

Preparing to ask Adora out, she and Spinnerella went to the tailors to find a nice outfit for her to wear. Browsing through the tailors with Spinnerella, Catra frowned, none of these damn dresses that the employee showed her matched the girl. Straying away from the dresses section, she walked over to the suits. Dresses were never her style anyways. After looking at boring black suits, Catra stood in front of a gorgeous magenta suit with a light pink undershirt. The woman came to Catra’s side, “That’s a pretty suit. Do you want that one Catra?” 

The girl nodded and grabbed the suit, “Yeah, I think I’m going to try it on first,” she walked over to the fitting room and put on the suit after stripping off her clothes. Looking in the mirror in the fitting room, Catra smiled, “Not bad,” She walked out of the room with the suit on to see what Spinnerella thought.

“It looks great!” She eyed the untied tie, “Hold on dear, let me just tie that for you,” she walked toward and was about to reach out for the tie, but Catra stopped her.

The brunette backed away from Spinnerella, “I think it suits me better if I have it undone, y’know?”

The woman smiled, “Whatever you say,” Catra walked back into the dressing room to change back out of her clothes and to pay for the suit at the front register. After paying, the two of them just went to a Target to get some cheap rose petals, which were pretty easy to find since Valentine's day wasn’t too long ago, and some fairy lights. 

Their next stop was a small florist shop called, Plumeria, which sold the prettiest flowers in the town. For a price of course. Catra searched through all of the different flower choices but frowned, “I don’t know what type of flowers Adora likes though.” 

Spinnerella looked at the selections of flowers, “These are pretty,” she pointed at white jasmine flowers and Catra blinked at them, “No? Oh okay, I think I might buy these for Netty and I then.”

“No they’re pretty,” Catra said, “I just don’t know if they’re Adora’s type,” she sighed then pulled out her phone, “I’ll just ask Glimmer or something.” 

Catra: hey sparkles can you do something useful for once and find out what is adoras favorite flower dont you dare tell her im asking or ill murder you

It took only a few seconds for Glimmer to reply. It makes sense, the girl practically had her phone next to her all day. 

queen sparkles: bitch. uhhh lemme ask

queen sparkles: campanula or some shit like that

Catra: thanks sparkles

queen sparkles: you owe me

Rolling her eyes at the last text, Catra scanned around the shop to find the flowers that Adora wanted. The girl frowned when she looked across the store and still didn’t find it. She walked over to the register where a sweet kind old lady was sitting at. “Hello, uh… do you happen to have a flower called campanula?”

The old woman nodded, “Oh I think that’s in the back. Give me one moment sweetheart,” she and Spinnerella exchanged looks as the woman went to the back and brought out a pot of beautiful small blue flowers, “Here you go dearie.”

“Is it okay if you can put it in a bouquet?”

“Of course, do you want just these flowers or another species as well?”

Catra blinked, “Uh… I think that’ll be all. Thank you.”

Going back to the back room, the old woman hummed and got to work on the bouquet. Catra ran her fingers through her hair, “I hope Adora really likes this,” she groaned, “I didn’t know planning asking someone out would be so stressful!”

Spinnerella laughed, “You’ll get used to it dear. I’m sure Adora will love it. I’ve seen the way she looks and acts around you.”

_ Everyone talks about how Adora looks at me,  _ Catra thought,  _ so… maybe things will be okay?  _ The brunette nodded and smiled at the woman, “Yeah you know what? I think things will be okay. I just have to be confident.”

“That’s my girl,” Spinnerella said, ruffling Catra’s fluffy hair. 

Coming out of the backroom again, the old woman was carrying a lovely bouquet of the campanula flowers, she handed it over to Catra, “Here you go dear, that really is a lovely set of flowers. Whoever you are giving it to is one lucky man!”

Catra smiled, “Yeah…  _ she _ really is.” 

  
  
  


Looking into the mirror with her suit on, Catra got out some hair gel and slicked her hair back with a comb. She stared at the mirror, “When did my forehead get so big? Ugh I have to cover that,” she messed up her hair a bit and allowed some strands of hair to cover her forehead. The girl stared at the mirror one last time, “That’s better, never liked having a clean look anyways.”

She walked over to her desk and quickly wrote a note on a piece of paper. The girl got some tape and her other supplies, then walked quickly over to Adora’s dorm building as she got weird looks from the college students that passed by her. It’s not everyday that you see a girl power walking through the campus looking like she’s about to go to a wedding. 

The brunette quickly taped the piece of paper on Adora’s room and pounded on the door before she made a run for it. Hiding behind a corner, Catra heard the door open and someone coming out. She took a deep breath, now she just had to use her time wisely and set up the plan.

Scattering rose petals across the rooftop and plugging in the fairy lights to the only power outlet available on the roofs, Catra sat down in the middle of it and held her knees close to her, “Fuck, why am I so nervous? I gotta be confident! Be confident! I can totally do this! Adora at the very least  _ likes _ me back,” the brunette sighed, “Ugh, this is so stressful.”

Catra looked up at the sky, “Fuck, it’s cloudy. It would have been so cool if we could see the stars. But of  _ course _ even nature is against my happiness,” she took a deep breath, “That was a joke,” she reminded herself. The girl looked down at her watch to check the time, there was about 15 minutes left until Adora was supposed to come. But knowing the girl, Adora was probably going to come early, so Catra stood in place and waited for her.

5 minutes later, the door slammed open, which startled Catra. A panting Adora ran up to the rooftops and yelled, “Catra!”

The brunette blinked and laughed, “There was no need to yell,”

“C-Catra…”

Smirking, Catra looked at Adora, “Hey Adora.”

Looking around the rooftops, Adora raised an eyebrow, “What is all of this?” 

Catra stepped forward, “What do you think princess? It’s all for you.” 

“Why?”

Rolling her eyes, Catra handed the bouquet of flowers to the blonde, who stared at it in shock, “Why not?” 

Adora looked up at Catra who was now smiling kindly at her, “Campanulas…?” Tears formed in her eyes, “How did you know these were my favorite?” 

Wiping Adora’s tears away with her thumb, Catra shrugged, “Props to Glimmer,” grabbing both of Adora’s hands, Catra looked into the girl’s eyes, “Adora… I’m going to be straightforward with you. Will you be my girlfriend?”

“W-what?” In a full on lesbian panic, Adora stuttered, “ _ M-Me _ ? Your girlfriend? Are you joking?” 

Dumbfounded, Catra rolled her eyes at Adora who was still talking to herself, “Gosh you’re so fucking dumb,” grabbing Adora’s collar, she pulled her into a kiss. After they pulled apart, Catra saw how red Adora was, “Don’t you get it? I love you!”

While Adora processed this thought, Catra tapped her foot, “You love me?” 

Getting nervous, Catra looked away and rubbed the back of her neck, “You’re such an idiot.”

“I love you too,” the brunette looked back at Adora and saw the girl smiling softly at her. Catra let out a sigh of relief and leaned in for another kiss, smiling into it. As they pulled apart, Adora smirked at Catra, “ _ W-wow _ .”

Pushing Adora playfully, Catra blushed, “Don’t ruin it,” she sighed, “Look… to be honest I was a bit scared that I found out I was in love with you. Since, caring for people hurt me so much throughout my life. I told myself to hide my heart from everyone so no one could hurt me again,” she looked up at Adora and blushed, “But then you came… and before I knew it I fell in love,” she looked away in embarrassment, “S-sorry was that too much? I didn’t mean to come onto you or anything.” 

The blonde smiled and pressed her forehead against Catra’s, “No… it wasn’t too much. It was perfect,” she then kissed Catra’s forehead and then looked around the rooftops, the lights of the fairy lights reflected off of her wide eyes, “Wow… it’s really pretty, I can’t believe you did this all for me!” She smirked at Catra, “You’re such a big softie. Who’d know you’d go all out just to ask me out.”

Catra rolled her eyes, “Shut up, I wanted this to be perfect okay?” She looked up at the cloudy skies and sighed, “Too bad the sky isn’t clear tonight. I really wanted to stargaze with you, since you seem to be into that like the giant nerd you are.”

Adora laughed, “I think it’s starting to clear up actually,” Catra looked up at the sky, and well enough the clouds started to part and she gazed up at the millions of bright stars in the night. Lying down on the ground, Adora patted a spot next to her so Catra could lie down there. “It’s beautiful tonight.”

“Yeah…” Catra said, looking at the twinkling stars, “It’s pretty great.”

There was a flash of light and Adora gasped, “No way! A shooting star, quick wish something!” Catra laughed at how fast Adora shut her eyes but Catra followed the girl and wished for something. 

_ I wish,  _ Catra thought,  _ that the future from now on will be bright for me and Adora. _

Sighing dreamingly, Adora turned to Catra and gave her a shiteating grin, “So… I guess this means you like me huh?”

Catra laughed and joked, “Pft, hell no princess. This is  _ not _ because I like you!”

Kissing Catra’s cheek, Adora smiled smugly again, “It’s because you  _ love _ me.”

Entangling their fingers together, Catra looked back up at the sky and smiled,

“Damn right it is.”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YESSSS YESS THEY DID IT THEY ARE GIRLFRIENDS FINALLY AFTER TWENTY FUCKING FOUR CHAPTERS THESE DORKS GOT THEIR SHIT TOGETHER AND FINALLY ADMITTED THAT THEY LOVE EACH OTHER! UGH I LOVE THEM SO MUCH YOU GUYS DONT EVEN KNOW! anyways yeah this chapter it was just pure fluff with a sprinkle of dumbness, lesbian panics, and dorkiness but its CATRADORA ofc there's gonna be a sprinkle of those! UGHHH THIS WAS SO CUTE TO WRITE YOU GUYS DONT KNOW I HAD TO LIKE STOP FOR A COUPLE OF SECONDS AND RESUME IT WAS JUST SO CUTE CATRA WANTED THINGS TO BE PERFECT AND IT WAS, MOSTLY LOL! anyways yeah hope you guys enjoyed this really fluffy chapter and yuh feel free to comment down below and hope you all have a good morning/afternoon/evening! :)


	25. lost in you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the best friend squad gets a new member

Humming happily to herself, Catra walked over to Adora’s- her  _ girlfriend’s  _ dorm room. “We’ve only dated for like 3 days or something, but I felt like I’ve been with her for like forever,” she said to herself, “Maybe because of all of the shit we’ve been through,” she joked as she looked down at the last text that Adora sent her. 

dumb blonde gf: Hey Catra! Come over to my place in like an hour or something. We have a surprise for you! 

Putting her phone away, Catra muttered, “Wonder what the surprise is.”

  
  
  


Staring at the banner, which said, “Welcome to the Best Friend Squad Catra!” Adora rubbed her chin, “Is this too much? It feels like too much. What if Catra doesn’t like it? I really,  _ really _ want her to like it.” 

Glimmer scoffed, “Please, let’s be real, Catra would love anything you do. If you wore a trash bag while serenading her, she’ll just fall in love with you all over again.” 

Wrapping an arm around his girlfriend, Bow smiled at the blonde, “Yeah Glimm’s right! Plus, it’s not every day we get a new member of the Best Friends Squad! We have to make it special!” He looked over at the counter which had a scrumptious strawberry cake on it, “We even got the cake she liked so much! I can’t wait to try it…”

Adora smiled, “Yeah you’re right, that cake is really good,” Glimmer raised an eyebrow at her and the blonde laughed, “I’m just kidding, I’m sure she’ll like this too.” She walked over to the corner of the room and tossed her friends some party poppers, “I think she could be coming soon. Also you guys might want to watch out about surprising Catra. Once I hugged her from behind and she kinda punched me.”

The shorter girl burst into laughter, “That’s hilarious! But I think Bow and I will be fine, considering that  _ you’ll _ be the one who opens the door for Catra.”

The blonde shrugged, “Guess so,” there was a knock on the door, “She’s here!” Adora whispered, “Turn off the lights and hide!” While Glimmer and Bow were turning off the lights and hiding, Adora took a deep breath and opened the door for Catra. “Hey Catra!” The girl said, kissing Catra’s cheek.

“Hey Adora,” Catra said, “Why’s it so fucking dark-”

Just then, Adora turned on the lights and Glimmer and Bow popped out of their hiding spots, firing the party poppers. Catra jumped up by surprise and cursed under her breath. Picking small pieces of confetti out of her hair, the girl grumbled, “What the hell?” She looked up and saw the banner, “Welcome to the Best Friend Squad Catra!” 

The girl blinked and pointed at the banner, “What is the fuck is that?”

Bow grinned, “Now that you and Adora are officially dating, we thought it would only be appropriate that you would be part of the Best Friends Squad!”

Catra looked over at Adora who was smiling down at her. She then rolled her eyes, “Pass, I’m already in a group with a dumb name,” she turned around and was about to head out of the door.

Holding her back by the shoulder, Glimmer smirked, “ _ Please _ , there can’t be a group with a dumber name than the Best Friend Squad.”

“You wanted our group name to be the Glimmer Group!” Adora yelled.

The boy sniffled, “But  _ I _ named us the Best Friend Squad…”

Kissing her boyfriend’s cheek, Glimmer laughed, “That’s not the point Bow,” she turned back to Catra, “Now what kinda group name that you have is more dumb than us?”

“The Super Pal Trio,” Catra said bluntly.

Wiping a tear of laughter from her eye, Glimmer chuckled, “Yeah, you win. That’s a pretty dumb name.”

Bow rolled his eyes and then smiled at Catra, “Just be part of both groups Catra! You’re like everyone’s exclusive member!”

Humming, Catra smirked, “Makes sense, I  _ am _ pretty exclusive,” she heard Adora snort besides her and the brunette turned to her girlfriend, “What? You gonna tell me I’m wrong or something princess?” 

Adora wrapped her arm around the girl’s waist, “You’re somewhat right. Since you’re pretty exclusive to me,” she kissed the top of Catra’s head.

Glimmer cringed, “You guys have been dating for like a few days and are already acting like an old couple. Cut it out, it’s making me hella sick.” 

“Aw! I think it’s cute Glimmer! Look at them, they are so cute!” Bow said, his eyes twinkling with joy as he looked at Adora and Catra. 

Rolling her eyes, Catra crossed her arms, “Okay, okay. This was great and all, but,” she leaned up to Adora’s ear and whispered in it, “I think I’m going to steal you away for a minute,” seeing the girl turn red, Catra smirked at Glimmer and Bow, “See you dorks later,” grabbing Adora’s hand, the couple ran out of the door leaving the other two.

Frowning, Bow stared at the opened door and walked to the counter which had the strawberry cake. He held it out in his arms and sniffled, “But we didn’t get to try the cake…”

  
  
  


Sitting at the bench outside of the cafeteria, Adora placed her hand in Catra’s. She smiled at her girlfriend who was staring at the sky, “Do you remember? This was the first time we saw each other,” the brunette turned and faced the girl, “I was walking here with Glimmer and Bow and I saw you sketching in your notebook,” she blushed, “We met eyes and I instantly fell for you because of how beautiful your eyes looked.”

Catra scoffed playfully, “Don’t get all sappy on me. Like what Glimmer said, you’re gonna make me sick princess.”

Laughing, Adora pecked the corner of Catra’s lips, “Yeah right. There you go acting all tough again. Both of us know that you’re a big softie, so there’s no need for you to keep acting like that you little brat.”

“It’s fun.”

The blonde took out her phone, “Come on let’s take a picture together, the lighting looks really nice right here!”

Groaning, Catra ran her fingers through her hair, “Why?”

“I need a new wallpaper!” Adora exclaimed.

Turning red, Catra thought,  _ Me being on Adora’s wallpaper? Everytime Adora uses her phone she’ll see me?  _ The brunette tried to play it cool even though she was having an internal lesbian panic, “Fine, just because you sound so desperate, it’s stupid,” she heard Adora scoff besides her, “I needa look good though.”

Adora smirked, “You always look good,” she said in a flirtatious tone.

Shoving her girlfriend, Catra flushed a crimson red, “Sh-shut up! Shut up and just take the damn picture idiot!” Laughing, Adora finally stopped teasing the brunette and took multiple selfies with her. The blonde stood up and walked away from the bench, Catra looked up and grumbled, “H-hey! What the hell are you doing?”

Focusing her camera on the girl, Adora took another picture of Catra just looking all grumpy like the little brat she is. Cracking up with laughter, Adora walked back to her girlfriend and showed her the picture that she took, “Oh my god! Look at you! You look so cute! I think I found my new lockscreen!”

Getting embarrassed, Catra turned red again and huffed, “Don’t you dare! I look so weird! I look like I’m going to murder someone!”

“You look adorable,” the other girl protested, “You look really cute when you’re all grumpy like this,” crossing her arms, Catra grumbled and she looked away from Adora, “Tada! Check it out! My new lockscreen!” Happily, she showed Catra the lockscreen.

Catra scoffed, “You’re such an asshole! I hate you.”

Kissing Catra on the temples, Adora smirked at her, “I know you don’t mean that. You  _ love _ me.”

“I know.”

  
  
  


Yawning after the long 2 hour music lecture, Catra packed her belongings into her bag and walked down to greet Spinnerella, who was on her phone, probably either on Pinterest or flirting with Netossa. “Hey mom.”

The woman smiled at Catra, “Hello Catra, don’t act like I didn’t see you sleeping in class again. If you’re going to sleep in class, you better at least look like you’re paying attention. You make it too obvious my dear.”

Rubbing the back of her neck, Catra laughed awkwardly, “Yeah I know. But don’t worry, I know what’s going on in class already,” Spinnerella raised a skeptical eyebrow at the girl and she sighed, “Okay I  _ partially _ know what’s going on in class already. But don’t worry about me! I’ll catch up on Sunday, you know I work better with a bit of stress on me.” 

Humming, Spinnerella smiled, “Alright I’ll believe you, your grades are pretty good in my and Netty’s classes,” leaning back against her desk, she looked up at the girl, “So, any plans for the weekend? Or are you too busy with your girlfriend to hang out with your old moms?”

“It’s not like that!” Catra blushed, “But yeah, she’s coming by here soon to pick me up, we’re going to her dorm later to hang out with Glimmer and Bow. Bow got a new projector so we can watch stuff there instead of on a laptop. But don’t worry, I’ll hang out with you guys like next weekend I promise.”

Spinnerella smiled, “You always hang out at the dorm, can’t you go yourself?”

The girl shrugged, “It’s more fun walking with someone.”

“I’ll take your word for it,” the door burst open and Adora walked down the stairs towards her girlfriend, hugging her as soon as they saw each other. 

The blonde turned to Spinnerella, “It’s good to see you again Ms. Spinnerella!”

The woman smiled, “Same here Adora,” she patted Catra’s head, “You kids have fun okay? Stay safe!”

“We’re just going to be watching a movie,” Catra smiled, “Bye mom! See you next week!”

After walking hand in hand towards Adora’s dorm building in a comfortable silence, the blonde suddenly nudged her, “‘Mom?’” 

Avoiding eye contact with her, Catra blushed in embarrassment, she never called Spinnerella or Netossa mom in front of anyone before. “Sh-shut up! They always look out for me and really act like my moms okay? Plus it was their idea for me to call me that!” 

Approaching the girl’s dorm room, Adora smiled, “Okay, okay! I won’t judge!”

Opening the door, Catra growled, “Don’t you  _ dare _ tell anyone, or I’ll kill you!” 

Behind the door was Bow and Glimmer eating a bunch of steamed buns together. “Ooh… are you guys talking about something secretive? Come on spill!” Glimmer said excitedly, “We’re the Best Friend Squad, you should trust us Catra!”

“Yeah Catra!” Bow echoed after his girlfriend.

Scoffing, Catra rolled her eyes and closed the door behind her, “Yeah not a chance dorks,” walking over to Adora’s bed and lying down on it, she stared at the ceiling, “So what are we watching?”

“ _ The Owl House _ ,” Bow said, “I heard it was really good. Plus there are baby gays.”

Sitting up, Catra’s eyes widened, “Baby gays? Alright I’m in,” Adora walked over to her girlfriend and snuggled with her as the show played on the projector. After around 13 episodes, a lot of steamed buns and energy drinks, Catra’s eyes started to get sleepy. She leaned her head on Adora’s shoulder, which immediately stiffened at the physical contact and closed her eyes.

  
  
  


Slowly opening her eyes, Catra stretched and saw that the room was pitch black, she looked at her phone. It was around 2 in the morning. She looked to her side and saw Adora holding her close as the blonde was snoozing. Looking around the room, she saw Glimmer and Bow on the other bed cuddling with each other. The girl blinked and buried her head back in the crook of Adora’s neck.

Despite her girlfriend’s snoring, Catra managed to fall asleep in Adora’s arms again and peacefully slept throughout the night. 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ugh they are so adorable, this chapter was just pure fluff and i am all for it because i usually write fluff and im not really one who writes angst lol bc most of my previous pics were fluff y'know? but just saying this whole story is practice for me to get better at angst because hint, my next fanfiction will be just full of angst. WELL ANYWAYS, catra is officially part of the best friend squad it was adorable, bow never got to eat his cake though... spinnerella being one of the best mom, netossa is the other best mom LOL anyways yeah of course i had to throw a bit of the owl house in there because that show is IMMACULATE and season two is coming out soon if im not mistaken. anyways yeah this chapter was just all cutesy and it was great. anyways hope you guys enjoyed todays chapter it's mostly gonna be fluff from now own because SADLY this fan fiction is coming to an end and i want to give you guys a fluff ending because you guys deserve it! ANYWAYS feel free to leave a comment down below about your opinion and yeah hope you all have a good morning/afternoon/evening! :)


	26. a song for you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> catra and adora go on a date night

It’s been a month since Catra and Adora have been officially going out. Being in a supportive relationship has really been helping Catra’s mental health. She still went to therapy sessions with Dr. Lynn, it was less often than before. Which was good for her, therapy sessions were fucking expensive for a broke college student.

Sitting in her room, Catra strummed the strings of her acoustic guitar. She looked to the right of her and saw her pinned music sheet of, “escapism.” The girl blinked at it and grabbed it off the wall. Staring at the lyrics, Catra grabbed a pen from the drawer next to her bed, “I think these lyrics are a bit outdated. I should change them.”

After practicing her new and improved version of, “escapism,” Catra put away her guitar and decided to FaceTime her moms. If she remembered correctly, they should be free for the rest of the day. The girl got her phone and started to ring up her moms. After about two rings, Netossa picked up.

“Hey Catra, what’s up?” Netossa said cheerfully.

The brunette lied down on her bed, “Nothing much, just wanted to check up on you guys. But I was too lazy to actually meet you guys in person,” she laughed when she saw the women’s faces, “Sorry moms, my bed is really cozy right now.”

Spinnerella chuckled when she saw her wife’s face, “Anyways Catra,” she said, “How are you and Adora doing?” 

Humming, Catra scratched her cheek, “We’re doing okay, I actually wanted to talk to you guys about her. Uh… I wanna take her out on a date night soon, but I need ideas. Usually she’s the one who plans stuff but I want to do something for her this time.”

Netossa gasped, “I know! Bring her over to our place, Spinny and I will cook up a nice dinner for the two of you!”

“Mom, every weekend we all have dinner together at your house, you know that right?” Catra sighed. 

Taking the phone from her wife, Spinnerella smiled at Catra, “You like music right?” Catra nodded her head. What kind of question was that? Of course she liked music, she was majoring in it for a reason, “Adora likes your music too right,” the brunette shrugged, “Then you two should probably go get dinner together and after that you can go to a bar with a stage and just sing for her there! It’ll make her night, I’m positive of it.”

Kissing Spinnerella’s cheek, Netossa grinned, “Your mom is just saying that because that was one of her date ideas for us back when we were around your age.”

Rolling her eyes, Spinnerella smiled, “Right again dear. But you did enjoy that night, didn’t you?”

“Of course I did!” Netossa grinned.

Catra laughed, “I like that idea, I’ll try to prepare something. It was great talking to you guys, I’ll see you guys soon. Thanks for the idea mom. Bye, I love you guys.”

On the other side of the call, Catra heard Netossa say, “Oh my god, she said she loved us! Spinny, she said she  _ loved _ us!”

The girl hung up before the two women could make a big deal about it. Putting her phone away, Catra stared at the popcorn ceiling of her dorm room. “Sing for her huh?” She eyed her guitar and the music sheet of, “escapism,” out of the corner of her eye, “I think I know exactly what to play.”

  
  
  


There was a knock on Adora’s dorm room as she was looking at her reflection in the mirror, “Be right there!” The girl yelled, “Just gotta get my keys,” she searched her drawers for her keys, usually Glimmer would be here to lock the door for her, but she was busy working on a project. After finding her keys, Adora walked over to the door and opened it. 

“Hey Adora,” Catra purred, giving her girlfriend a kiss on the cheek when she went into the room. She sat on the edge of Adora’s bed, “Ready for tonight?” 

The blonde smiled, “Hey Catra. Yeah, I’m ready. I’m excited to see what you planned for us,” she walked over to the brunette and squeezed her cheeks, “I didn’t know you were such a planner!”

Grumbling, Catra pulled away from Adora’s grips, “Ah, stop that! I’m not a child,” she heard Adora laugh and she reluctantly showed her hidden smile, “And yeah, I wanted to do something special for you. Because… you’re kinda special to me.”

Blushing, Adora walked over to her closet to hide her red face from Catra, “Look at you, revealing your feelings like that. And you call  _ me _ sappy,” Catra rolled her eyes as Adora put on a slightly ripped denim jacket. 

Catra stood up from the bed and offered her hand for Adora to take, “Ready to go princess?”

“Always am.”

  
  
  


Parking her car outside of a packed restaurant, Adora gaped her mouth open, “Woah… I can’t believe you got reservations for the Velvet Glove! This place is like  _ super _ popular! How’d you get it?”

Getting out of the car, Catra sighed, “I had to call like a week ahead of time to get a table at this damn restaurant. All for you,” Adora blushed and Catra playfully pushed the girl’s side, “So you better be grateful.”

The blonde rolled her eyes, “Of course,” she said in a sarcastic tone. Hand in hand, the two girls walked to the restaurant and a waiter led them towards their designated table where they sat across from each other. 

Scanning through the menu, Adora rubbed her chin, “I thought this place would be really expensive, considering how crowded it is, but the prices here are pretty affordable, not gonna lie.” 

“Makes sense,” Catra said, her eyes fixed on the menu, “Even though BMU is pretty expensive, it’s not like there are many rich people in this area. I think I’ll get a filet mignon, it comes with a side salad too. What about you Adora?”

Still looking at the menu, Adora looked at the prices and just wanted to get a cheap option. She didn’t want to make Catra’s wallets hurt, since her girlfriend insisted that she will pay for everything tonight. “Uh… I’ll just get the caesar salad.”

The brunette furrowed her eyebrows, “Okay… but there’s no way in hell you’re  _ just _ going to be eating that. I won’t allow it. Get another item. You’re a growing girl, you have to eat more. Get like a lobster or something. Just eat more.” 

Frowning, Adora looked down, “But-”

Sighing, Catra placed her hand on top of Adora’s from across the table, “If you’re worried about the money.  _ Don’t _ . I just want you to have a good time okay? Now get something else to eat.”

Obeying her, Adora scanned the menu for another item to get. After deciding on which dish to eat tonight, they called over a waiter and ordered. Catra got a medium rare filet mignon which came along with a side salad, while Adora got black truffle pasta and ratatouille. 

The couple chatted as they waited for their dish to come out, which took about 20 minutes. It was a pretty reasonable amount of time, considering how busy the Velvet Glove was. Digging into their dishes, Catra smiled at her girlfriend who was basically inhaling her food, the truffle pasta was gone within seconds. While Adora was eyeing the ratatouille as her next target, she looked up and saw Catra looking fondly at her. The girl laughed, “W-what? Is there something on my face?” She grabbed the napkin and started to wipe it.

“Adora you’re so dumb,” Catra chuckled, Adora stopped her hand stared at the brunette, “You can’t wipe off beauty.”

Blushing, the girl covered her red face with her hands, “Shut up… you’re embarrassing me!”

Catra rolled her eyes, “ _ Duh _ , that was like the whole point princess.”

“Just shut up and eat!” Adora yelled. As the two girls ate, they talked about their plans for the upcoming Spring Break. How they would go back to visit Razz and spend time with her for the whole week. After talking about the plans for Spring Break, which had a couple of flirtatious remarks in there, the two girls were done eating and left the restaurant after Catra paid for the both of them. 

  
  
  


Getting out of the car after a 20 minute ride from the Velvet Glove, the two girls stood outside of a small tavern that was in the downtown area. Adora looked at the building and saw Catra in front of her, holding out her hand for the blonde, “You coming?”

Smiling at her, Adora accepted the hand and the two of them walked into the tavern, which was fairly crowded. Catra gulped and turned to Adora, “Okay, go sit in the booth back there and I’ll be right there. I promise.”

Raising an eyebrow at her girlfriend, Adora squeezed the hand that she was holding, “Where are you going?” 

Catra kissed Adora’s cheek, “It’s a surprise okay? You’ll find out soon,” Adora nodded her head and walked over to the booth where Catra told her to sit at. 

The blonde tried to keep her eye on Catra, but unluckily for her, she watched her disappear into the crowd to who knows where. There was a microphone feedback on the stage and Adora covered her sensitive ears. She looked up at the stage where she saw a tall ginger woman clear her throat, “Hello everyone! Today’s performance is by a new singer. Why don’t you introduce yourself?”

“Thanks Fern,” a familiar voice said, Adora’s eyes widened when she saw Catra on stage, holding her acoustic guitar and a sheet of paper. The brunette pulled a chair and adjusted the microphone, “Hey guys. My name is Catra, I’m pretty new here, it’s my first time performing. I just contacted Fern a few days ago about performing here and ta da, here I am,” the crowd laughed and Catra smiled, “Anyways, this song is called, ‘escapism,’ by yours truly, and it is dedicated to a certain blonde that is here tonight at the tavern.”

Adora’s heart fluttered when Catra winked in her direction. The brunette took a deep breath to ease her stage fright, it’s been a while since she performed in front of so many people. Then, she plucked the strings of her guitar as she sang in her soft, husky voice.

_ I guess I have to face _

_ That in this awful place _

_ I shouldn’t show a trace of doubt _

_ But pulled against the grain _

_ I feel a little pain  _

_ That I would rather do without _

_ But now I’m finally _

_ Free-ee-ee _

_ Free-ee-ee _

_ Free… _

_ But now I’m finally _

_ Free-ee-ee _

_ Free-ee-ee _

_ Free… _

_ Free-ee-ee _

_ Free-ee-ee _

_ Free… _

_ Because of you…  _

After finishing her song, the crowd gave her a standing ovation, there were even some people whistling at her. Catra smiled into the microphone, “Thank you guys! It’s been great! Maybe I’ll be back to perform again!” Hopping down from stage after taking her belongings, she reunited with Adora in her arms. 

“Oh my god!” Adora smiled, “Catra! That song! It sounds beautiful! And you changed the lyrics? Oh my god it’s  _ so _ beautiful!” She repeated.

Blushing, Catra smiled softly, “The old lyrics were a bit outdated.”

Adora kissed her cheek and rubbed the back of her neck awkwardly, “You said that song was dedicated to me?”

The brunette laughed, “Y-yeah… it is.”

Nudging her shoulder, Adora teased her, “Softie,” she saw Catra roll her eyes at her and she smiled again, “I love you because of that.”

“I love you more,” Catra said, sticking her tongue out. She grabbed her acoustic guitar and walked out of the tavern with her hand in Adora’s. Driving back to the BMU campus, Catra looked over at Adora who was gazing out of the car’s passenger window. 

_ There was a reason why I changed the lyrics,  _ Catra thought as she drove,  _ There is a reason why the lyrics are outdated. I no longer feel trapped in this world. I’m no longer tied down to the Earth by something. I want to be here now. I want to keep living. Not because of art or music, though that did play a huge factor before. Now I know that people care about me. I have Netossa, Spinnerella, Entrapta, Scorpia, Glimmer, Bow,  _ She glanced at Adora out of the corner of her eye,  _ You. Though others played a big part in my lifestyle change, I feel free now and that’s because I met you. I wouldn’t be where I am without you. _

_ Thank you Adora, for everything. _

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> omg look at her catra has grown so much and ugh i love her. this whole chapter was just really fluffy and im here for it y'know? fluff is my specialty ofc. OKAY BUT CATRA CHANGING THE LYRICS OF ESCAPISM BECAUSE SHE FEELS FREE NOW AND NO LONGER TRAPPED IS SO ADORABLE (no pun intended) AND UGH OMG I JUST LOVE HER. look at spinnerella and netossa being best moms and helping catra out with date night i love them. im going to be so sad when this fic ends escapism is like MY CHILD ugh im getting sentimental anyways i love these dorks so so much they've been through hell but still found their way to each other i love them. anyways hope you guys enjoyed today's chapter feel free to leave a comment down below and yeah hope you guys have a good morning/afternoon/evening!


	27. back together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> catra and adora go back to razz's house for spring break

After a long 2 hour lecture that felt like eternity, Catra stood up from her seat and giddily packed her belongings into her bag. Finally, Spring Break was here! She walked down to Netossa who was waving at her, “So, you’re going to be leaving your poor old moms for a week to head to the countryside to frolic with your little girlfriend?” 

Catra smirked, “It’s sounding like you’re going to miss me old woman.”

“Damn right I will!” Netossa laughed, giving Catra a noogie on her head, “You better still call Spinnerella and I, or you’ll never hear the end of it when you come back.”

Trying to pull out of Netossa’s grip, Catra growled, “Alright! Alright!” The building’s door swung open and Adora came walking in, “Hey Adora,” Catra purred.

The blonde waved to her girlfriend, “You ready to go?”

“Yeah,” Catra said, “We gotta wait till Netossa lets me go though,” she laughed.

Finally letting go of Catra, Netossa laughed, “Fine, but remember you have to tell Spinnerella you’re leaving okay?” Catra nodded and gave her a thumbs up and the woman turned to Adora, “Make sure this little squirt stays out of trouble. If she pulls anything funny, make sure to call me and I’ll give her a piece of my mind,” she smiled, “You have my number don’t you dear?”

Adora nodded, “Yep!”

Holding Adora’s hand, Catra waved goodbye to Netossa and the two girls started to head towards the music department to tell Spinnerella that they were leaving. Catra opened the door to the lecture room and saw Spinnerella wrapping up her lecture. After waiting for her other students to walk out of the room, the two girls ran down to Spinnerella and Catra gave her a big hug.

“I’ll be leaving now okay?” Catra said.

Spinnerella smiled, “Have fun okay dear? Make sure to call us or Netossa will be sensitive about it,” she laughed and turned to Adora, “Take care of each other.” They all came into a big group hug one more time before they left. 

The couple walked back to Catra’s dorm to get the luggage that she packed last night for the trip. After getting the brunette’s luggage, they walked over to Adora’s dorm to get her belongings. Adora sighed, “I wonder how Razz will react when I tell her that we are together now.”

Catra snorted, she remembered the talk that she had with Razz during Winter Break. The girl knew damn well that Razz knew that they liked each other. But, she  _ did _ want to see Adora’s reaction when she finds out Razz already knew about the mutual feelings, “I think it’ll be fine.”

Opening the door, they saw Glimmer and Bow getting ready to leave to meet their families again. The four members of the Best Friend Squad embraced each other and Glimmer had to calm Bow down from crying too much. “It’ll be fine Bow, it’s only a week. You’ll survive,” Glimmer siad, patting his arm.

Catra and Adora awkwardly glanced at each other while Bow blew his nose loudly in a tissue, “I know! I’ll still miss you guys though!” After calming down a bit, the boy smiled at him, “Hope you guys have fun. Bring back some pie for me and Glimm though, Razz’s pies are to  _ die _ for!”

“Yeah sure thing,” Catra said, “Now come on Adora let’s go, we have a train to catch y’know. If we stay here any longer, we’re never going to leave.”

Sighing, Adora reluctantly grabbed her bag and waved goodbye to her friends again, “See you guys soon!” She turned to Catra and held her hand as they walked to the girl’s car and put their luggage in the trunk. 

  
  
  


Seated on the train, Adora looked down at Catra who was dozing off on her shoulder. She warmly smiled at the girl and looked out of the window.  _ This whole trip back to my hometown,  _ the girl thought,  _ almost feels like deja vu… except some things are a bit different of course. I don’t feel nervous anymore, I’m excited to see Razz again, now that we have made things right. I also don’t feel anger towards Mara anymore,  _ she sighed and held Catra’s hand as the girl slept,  _ Though, I do also want to do something during this trip. I think it’ll give me a bit more closure.  _

Adora started to close her eyes and leaned her head on Catra’s,  _ Whatever… This is so stressful to think about right now. I think I’ll just rest for now… _

  
  
  


After the long 4 hour train ride and an Uber ride to Razz’s house, the two girls were exhausted. Lethargically, they got out of the Uber and walked over to the small cottage-like house. Holding Catra’s hand, Adora looked at the time, it was 11 pm. The blonde sighed, “Razz should know that we’re here,” she rang the doorbell and waited for the old woman to come out. 

Waiting around 30 seconds in the cool Spring air, the door finally opened and Razz greeted the two girls with a big hug, “Adora dearie! Catra dearie! You’ve finally visited old Razz!” They both tiredly smiled at the old woman who seemed energetic despite the late hours, “Come in, come in!”

They both walked into the house carrying their luggage, which they dropped in the living room. Collapsing on the couch, Catra rested her eyes, “So fucking tired…” she muttered.

Sitting next to her girlfriend, Adora held her close and watched Razz sit next on the other couch in the living room, “It’s been quite a long time! How are you two doing?”

“Exhausted,” Catra uttered, resting her head on Adora’s shoulder.

The blonde laughed, “Yeah… we are a bit tired, Razz. It’s a pretty long ride from BMU here.”

Razz looked at the wallclock and nodded her head, “Ah… you’re right, it’s pretty late. You two should go to sleep in Adora’s room. Don’t worry, Razz has already cleaned up the room and there is a futon ready for Catra to sleep on too.”

Helping a tired Catra stand up, Adora smiled at the old woman, “Thank you Razz. We’ll catch up tomorrow I promise. You should get some rest too, I’m sure you are tired from waiting for me and Catra to come.”

“Oh dearie, don’t worry about me. Razz isn’t tired, I have been drinking tea while I waited for you,” Razz walked forward and kissed Adora on the cheek, “Go get some rest dearie, I can’t wait to talk to the both of you again.” 

Smiling, the couple trudged back to Adora’s room, where Catra ignored the futon and just collapsed on Adora’s neat bed. Slowly getting tired, Adora followed her girlfriend and slept on the soft mattress next to her. Kissing her girlfriend’s forehead, Adora smiled, “Good night Catra.”

Shifting on the bed, Catra groaned, “G’night Adora…”

  
  
  


Waking up, Adora looked next to her and saw Catra still dozing away.  _ She must be really tired,  _ the girl thought,  _ I should get ready for the day _ . Adora looked over to her alarm clock and saw that it was 8 am, _ Razz should already be up.  _

Adora got out of bed and walked over to the bathroom where she freshened up. After getting ready for the day, she walked over to the kitchen where she saw Razz preparing some fillings for pie. “Good morning Razz,” the girl smiled.

“Ah! Adora dearie!” The old woman exclaimed, “Is Catra dearie up yet? We are making pie today!”

The blonde sat on the kitchen stool, “We  _ always _ make pie Razz,” she laughed. 

Razz raised an eyebrow, “That is the point of pie! To be eaten everyday! Is it not?” Adora laughed more and the old woman adjusted her glasses, “I will think about that later… Anyways go wake up Catra dearie, we have much work to do today! I need both of your help with it!”

Nodding her head, Adora stood up from her stool and walked back to her bedroom where she saw Catra’s entire body spread out across her queen sized bed, as the girl drooled on the sheets. The blonde kneeled on her bed and started to violently shake Catra’s body, “Wake up!” She yelled.

Opening her eyes quickly, Catra was finally awake and saw Adora laughing at her, “W-what the hell?” She said in her rough morning voice, “Why’d you do that?! Ugh… now I  _ have _ to get up…” Taking the blankets off of her, Catra covered half of her face as she groaned. 

“Well yeah! That’s kinda like the whole point of me shaking you,” Adora said, giving the brunette a shiteating grin, “Now hurry up and get ready. Razz needs our help.”

Moving the strands of hair out of her face, Catra grumbled, “Help with what?” 

Adora leaned in and kissed the top of her girlfriend’s head, “Making pie of course,” the blonde took both of Catra’s hand and lifted her up from the bed, “Now hurry!” She ordered, kicking Catra’s butt to make her move faster.

“Okay! Okay!” Catra said, making her way to the bathroom to get ready like what Adora told her to do.

After getting all cleaned up, Catra sat tiredly at the kitchen stools along with Adora, as they both watched Razz make pie together. The brunette whispered into Adora’s ear, “We’re not even doing anything… We’re just sitting here. Didn’t you wake me up because she needed help?”

The girl shrugged, “Yeah, something like that.” 

Catra let out a deep sigh as she saw Razz finish up filling the pie with a delectable strawberry filling and put the pastry into the oven. The old woman smiled to herself as turned on the oven. Pulling out a stool from across the two girls, Razz looked at them, “So how are you two doing?” 

“We’re doing pretty good,” Adora smiled, she looked over at Catra who slightly nodded her head, they had to tell Razz that they were dating now. She took a deep breath, “Razz there’s something I need to tell you,” the girl heard Razz hum in response, “Uh… it may seem crazy but Catra and I are dating now.”

The woman laughed, “Well it’s about time!”

Staring at Razz in shock, Adora blinked, “W-what do you mean?”

Razz looked over at Catra who was trying to hold in her laughter, “Catra dearie why don’t you tell her the talk that we had last time you visited?”

Adora’s mouth gaped open in surprise. What talk?”

Placing her hand on top of Adora’s, Catra laughed, “Yeah… about that. During Winter Break, I woke up before you one time and talked to Razz alone in the morning,” the brunette saw how confused Adora still looked and sighed, “Basically she knew that we had feelings for each other. She was our number one shipper!” 

The blonde laughed, “How did I not know about this?”

“I dunno, you are pretty dull sometimes,” Catra joked, knocking on Adora’s head, “Hear that? It’s all hollow.” 

Rolling her eyes playfully, Adora shoved Catra, “Oh shut up you brat,” she looked over at Razz and smiled, “So yeah… I guess you already saw this coming.”

“Of course I did!” Razz exclaimed, “Anyways, while we wait for the pie, let’s continue catching up. I can’t wait to hear how the both of you have been the last couple of months!”

The three of them continued to talk about what happened when they left as they ate fresh baked pie. Catra had to open up about the whole…  _ situation _ she was in before, but assured the woman that she was alright now. It was entertaining to the brunette when she saw an old lady scold her girlfriend about the whole Erin situation that happened before. 

Though the past months were rough for the two girls, they were now comfortable talking about the situation since the two of them have grown significantly since then. They could tell that Razz was proud of them for growing up much and it warmed their hearts. 

  
  
  


It’s been 2 days since Adora and Catra have been staying at Razz’s. They’ve both been having so much fun, they talked about many different subjects, the past, their future plans, and relationship stuff. Old people always delivered great advice, you know. 

Though catching up with Razz was part of Adora’s plan during her trip back to her hometown, there was another important reason why she was here. To get some kind of closure about Mara. She knew about the DVD, but she wanted to know more about her sister. She wanted to talk to her again.

Adora walked into the room where she saw Catra on her phone as she rested on the bed. The girl walked over to her and kissed the brunette’s cheek, “Hey, I’m going to be leaving for the day.”

Sitting up, Catra looked at her, “What? Do you need me to come with you?”

“No… I have to do this myself. I  _ need _ to do this myself,” holding Catra’s hand, Adora smiled, “Don’t worry about me okay? I’ll be fine. I’ll be back in time for bed, I promise.”

The girl sighed, “Alright… I don’t know where you’re going, but stay safe okay?”

Kissing her on the temple, Adora smirked, “Always am,” she stood up and put on her iconic red varsity jacket, “Have fun with Razz alright? I’ll be back soon, I promise,” she repeated. She walked out of the door and took out her old bike which was locked in Razz’s backyard. Taking her bike out to the front, Adora’s looked around the colorful garden which had different species of flowers, but her eyes were attracted to the campanula flowers which danced in the wind. 

Adora smiled at them, “After all this time, I can’t believe she still grows them…” she walked over to the flowers and carefully plucked out 3 from the ground, before she rode on her bike to who knows where. All Adora knew was that she was going to find Mara. 

“Please, just let me talk to her one last time…”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> look at them!!! razz is def the number one catradora shipper AFTER ME LMFAO they are so adorable together i love them! razz knew all along that they were a thing that's so funny. anyways yeah adora is going to try to get some closure and things will get a bit heartfelt in the next chapter so hope you guys are ready. AND YES THERE IS A MEANING BEHIND ADORA'S FAVORITE FLOWER! okay but the little catra and spinnerella and netossa moments are so cute! i love writing their dynamic haha anyways yeah this was a pretty chill chapter until the end and adora is going to be on a "mission" so yeah. uh tomorrow is the second to last chapter so im a sentimental because this story is literally my child haha anyways hope you guys enjoyed today's chapter and feel free to leave your opinion down below in the comments! hope you guys have a good morning/afternoon/evening! :)


	28. sad i am to never hear you sigh

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> adora goes to get more closure about mara

_ “Mara!” Adora said, running to her sister’s side when she saw Mara planting some seeds into the orphanage’s backyard, “What are you doing?” The curious girl said, sitting next to her sister. _

_ The brunette patted her sister’s head, “Hey ‘Dora,” she smiled, “I’m just planting some flowers here. The backyard is a bit bland for my taste.” _

_ Picking up the flower seed bag, Adora read it, “Cam-pan-ula?” Packing the dirt into the ground, Mara nodded, “What does it mean?” The girl looked at the blonde and raised an eyebrow, “Uh… in school I learned that sometimes flowers mean something. Does this one mean something?” _

_ Standing up and wiping the dirt off of her, Mara rubbed her chin, “I don’t really know, all I know are that they are pretty,” she looked down at Adora and held her little sister’s hand, “But I’ll find out what it means for you later okay?” _

_ “You promise?” _

_ Mara grinned, “I promise.” _

  
  
  


Pedaling towards the direction of her old orphanage, Adora looked down at her hand which was still clutching the tree campanula flowers, “Now that I think about it, it’s ironic that your favorite flowers were campanulas… Since they meant-”

  
  
  


_ Getting out of the school bus, Mara ran over to her little sister who was waiting for her as usual at the orphanage fences. She picked the blonde up in her arms, “Adora! Guess what! I found out what campanula’s mean!” _

_ Gasping in surprise, Adora grinned, “Really? What do they mean?” _

_ The girl put her sister back on the floor, “Well they mean- _

  
  
  


“…Gratitude, humility, attractiveness and everlasting love,” Adora then grimaced, “Disappointment. And the foreshadowing of events…” She bitterly laughed at herself as she continued biking towards the orphanage, “Is the orphanage even still there…?”

After biking for around 5 miles downtown, Adora stopped in front of the orphanage, which was still standing after all of these years. She locked her bike around a streetlamp and took a deep breath before she walked into the orphanage’s front doors. 

Looking around the main room, everything looked similar when she first left. Adora looked up and saw Ms. Hope herself, standing behind the front desk, “Y-you’re…  _ Adora _ ?”

“That’s right,” the blonde said.

Ms. Hope looked down, “How is Mara doing?”

Was this woman serious? Adora grit her teeth in anger, “Are you really going to ask me that! It’s your fault that Mara is gone! You knew about the sickness but you chose to hide it from everyone! You made Mara lie to me! Why?!”

The woman sighed, “We found out about the cancer when Mara was still a minor. I would have let her go through chemotherapy, but the orphanage was short on money during that time. I wasn’t going to go to debt,” Ms. Hope looked away from Adora’s fiery eyes, she couldn’t bring herself to look at the girl, “I thought… Mara would survive, but the fact that you’re here tells me that she’s… gone. I’m so-”

“Don’t bother apologizing,” Adora said, “I forgave Mara for leaving me. But I won’t forgive you! You’re the one who caused this series of unfortunate events. Hear that? It’s your fault that I have no sister! All of this is your fault!” The girl took a deep breath to recollect herself, “I just wanted to hear the words come out of your mouth before I cut ties with you for good,” turning her back, Adora laughed sickly, “Thanks though… I feel a bit better. Mara told me not to waste my energy on scums of the earth like you,” Adora then walked out of the door.

Ms. Hope clenched her teeth, “Adora! Adora, wait! Adora!”

  
  
  


_ “Adora!” The little girl turned around and saw her sister open the door of their old apartment door as she returned back from her shift at the diner. Adora ran over to her big sister’s arms and hugged her tightly, “Hey guess what! I have a surprise for you!” _

_ The girl tilted her head skeptically, “A good one or a bad one?” _

_ Mara laughed, “A good one of course silly!” Adora watched as Mara took out the familiar blue flower from behind her, “Check it out!” _

_ Adora gazed at the flower in awe, “Campanulas! They are so pretty! Where did you get them?” _

_ The brunette girl grinned, “I mentioned to that kooky old lady, Razz, you remember her right?” the little girl nodded her head eagerly, “That campanulas were my favorite flowers, and she decided to grow some in the garden that she had! Isn’t that just so sweet?” _

  
  
  


Exhausted from biking so much, Adora sat on a bench and wiped the sweat off of her face. The next thing she had to do now after confronting Ms. Hope was to find out which hospital Mara was staying at when she died. Maybe if she found out where she stayed, she could find out where she is currently resting right now. 

Taking out her phone, Adora searched up online where the nearest hospitals were. The blonde made a face, “Seriously? 4 hospitals in this area? All miles apart? Fuck this is going to take longer than I thought,” Getting on her bike again, Adora started pedaling again, “I better make this trip quick. After all, I made a promise to  _ her _ .” 

__

  
  


Walking out of the bathroom after she freshened up, Catra went to the living room where she saw Razz watching the news on the TV. She walked over to the old woman who smiled kindly at her, “Hello Catra dearie, do you know where Adora went?”

Catra nodded, “Yeah she went to do some personal business I think. She told me to take care of you, so what do you want to do?” 

The old woman slowly stood up and grabbed a jigsaw puzzle from a cabinet, “I bought this set ages ago, but never felt ready to start it until now. Since you’re here, how about we work on this together?”

_ Oh fuck,  _ Catra thought,  _ Do I have to? _ She looked at Razz who was smiling at her, the brunette sighed,  _ The things I do for you Adora.  _ The girl smiled, “Bring it on,” Razz unscrewed the top of the jigsaw puzzle and poured out thousands of puzzle pieces on the table. Catra gulped, “Bring it… on,” she said less confidently than last time. 

  
  
  


After biking to 3 out of the 4 hospitals, it was nearly sun set. Tiredly Adora pedaled to the last hospital and after she locked up her bike, she walked into the building. Wiping the sweat off of her face, she walked up to the front receptionist, “Sorry to bother, but did you have a patient named Mara Gray before here?”

The nurse hummed, “I don’t know, I’ll try to find her files though. Please give me a moment,” nodding her head, Adora walked over to the nearby chairs to catch her breath. She knew hospitals were always busy and slow, so she figured that it would take that nurse around 30 minutes to find her sister’s files.

Adora closed her eyes for a second until the nurse called her after around 10 minutes. Handing her some documents, the nurse frowned, “Yes, there was a Mara Gray here. She sadly passed away though… I’m so sorry.”

“I-it’s okay,” Adora stuttered as she stared at the records, “Do you know where she was buried?”

The woman pointed at the document, “Everything we have on Mara Gray are in those documents.”

The blonde muttered, “Thanks,” and she nodded her head as she searched for Mara’s burial ground for a couple of minutes. Her eyes widened when she found it, “Whispering Woods Public Cemetery…” she muttered. The girl walked over to the receptionist and gave her back Mara’s records, “Thank you so much!” Adora smiled.

“Y-yeah…” the receptionist blushed, “No problem.”

Running out of the hospital and biking towards the cemetery, Adora looked at the campanulas that she still had, “Mara… just wait a bit longer, your sister is coming!”

  
  
  


A couple of hours, 4 cups of tea, and one pie tray later, Razz and Catra finally finished the jigsaw puzzle. The brunette slumped on the couch, “Ugh finally…” she muttered. The girl turned towards the clock and saw that it was 8 pm, “She should be coming back soon…”

  
  
  


Parking and locking her bike in front of the cemetery, Adora walked through the cemetery, ignoring the chills that went down her spine. After searching for Mara’s grave, Adora found herself in front of a very dirty, forgotten grave.

“Could it be…?” Adora took out her phone and shined some light on the grave, “It is!”

**Mara Gray**

**1998-2017**

The girl placed the slightly wilted campanula flowers on top of the grave, “Hey sis…” Adora muttered, “It’s me, ‘Dora?” She sighed, “To be honest, for years I hated you. You kept me in the dark for so long and just left me without any explanation. It really hurt y’know…” She kept talking to the grave, “For so long, I wanted nothing to do with you. I remember that I never wanted to become the person you were. But then I saw the video and found out the truth. I still think you should have told me, but I understand your point of view.”

“It’s funny,” she chuckled softly, “growing up, I wanted to be like you. But when you left, I didn’t want to be like you at all. I didn’t want to be the hero that you played in my childhood. Then I rescued someone from taking their life. I suppose we’re more alike than I can comprehend. Mara… I know it’s been years since we’ve talked,” Adora said, her body shaking as she softly cried, “it may be too late, but I’m here today because I want to tell you that I forgive you. I love you Mara. And I- I miss you so much, I wish you were here with me. I know you can’t talk to me right now, but hopefully you can hear all of this…” 

Adora stood up and wiped the tears from her face. A load of guilt was lifted from her chest and she felt lighter after talking to Mara’s grave. “I wish I could still talk to you,” she whispered. Suddenly, a hand grabbed Adora’s shoulder and the girl jumped up and screamed loudly, “Zombie!”

“You’re such an idiot,” a familiar voice spoke. Adora turned around and saw Catra looking at her, “Hey Adora.”

The blonde stared at her girlfriend in surprise, “C-Catra? What the hell are you doing here? Are you even here or am I just crazy?”

Catra shrugged, “Both,” she sighed, “It’s fucking midnight and you said you would be home before bedtime. So I figured that I would just come to you and see what the fuck you were doing.”

“How’d you know I was here?” Adora asked.

Pulling out her phone, Catra showed Adora, “We share each other’s location remember?” 

“Oh right!” Adora said.

Nodding her head, Catra looked at the grave that was besides them, “So… that’s Mara?” Adora hummed in reply. The brunette kneeled in front of the grave, “It’s nice to meet you Mara,” Catra whispered, “Don’t worry about Adora, she may be a bit dumb, but I’ll protect her. She’s in good hands, I promise,” she stood up and held out a hand to Adora, “Come on Adora, it’s late. We should head back home.”

Eyes fixed on the grave, Adora sighed and then nodded, “Okay,” she looked back at the grave, “I’ll be back soon sis. It was nice to talk to you again.”

  
  
  


It’s been two days since Adora had found Mara’s grave. She told Razz about it and they’ve visited it together already. But for some reason, Adora couldn’t get the state of the grave out of her mind. She put on her jacket and walked out to the living room where Razz and Catra were at, “Are you going somewhere Adora dearie?” Razz asked.

“Yeah, I’m going back to the cemetery to visit and clean Mara’s grave,” Adora said, putting on her shoes.

Catra stood up from the couch, “I’ll come with you.”

Adora pursed her lip, “Are you sure?”

“Of course I am dummy,” Catra looked at Razz, “Do you want to come Razz?”

The old woman smiled and shook her head, “I’m afraid not dearie, my knitting channel is about to start. Go without me dearies, I’ll be fine. I’ll visit Mara another time myself,” the two girls looked at each other and waved goodbye to Razz as they started to take a stroll on towards the cemetery. 

On the way to the cemetery, Adora saw a florist shop and decided to get a proper bouquet of campanula flowers for Mara to put on her grave. After she got the bouquet, they continued walking to the cemetery which took them an hour to get to. 

At the cemetery, there were free headstone cleaning equipment for those who wanted to clean their loved ones graves. Taking a pressure washer and a soft bristled brush, Adora and Catra made their way to Mara’s grave and started to clean it. 

First she scraped off the moss with the brush and after that, she used the pressure washer to deep clean the grave. Once the grave was all soaked, Adora once again used her brush and scrubbed the excess dirt and moss. 

The girl then kneeled in front of the now clean grave and placed the bouquet of campanula flowers on it. “Here Mara…” Adora whispered, “Your favorite. These ones are much prettier and healthier than the last flowers I gave you.” 

Adora felt Catra place a comforting hand on her shoulder, “Your grave is all clean and pretty now. Don’t worry, just like you took care of me when I was a kid. I’ll take care of you. I  _ promise _ ,” she stood up and smiled at Mara’s resting place, 

“Rest well Mara.”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter was very bittersweet at least to me ofc there was meaning behind the flowers and ofc it had to be sad because i love making people hurt LOL! anyways at least adora found her resting place and i thought it was super sweet that catra was like to mara's grave, "i'll take care of adora dont worry," i thought that part was sweet. yeah i made light hope a scum in this story there was nothing really that redeeming about her but whatever LOL anyways yeah catra and razz bonding though was so fun to right even though they ever interacted in the show i feel like season 5 catra and razz would maybe get along haha. anyways hope you guys enjoyed the chapter and i am sad to say that tomorrow is the LAST CHAPTER of this story it's been such a rollercoaster. anyways hope you guys enjoyed today's chapter and feel free to leave a comment down below and hope you all have a good morning/afternoon/evening!


	29. warmth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> catradora fluff to end this rollercoaster ride

Spring Break was almost over. Catra and Adora would be staying at Razz’s house for one more day until they returned back to college. The brunette groaned, “Ugh, I don’t want to go back to school,” she turned to Adora who was reading on the bed besides her, “Hey, here’s an idea. How about we just drop out and just stay here?”

Adora snorted, “Yeah, not a chance,” she closed her book and cuddled with Catra, “Plus the school year is almost over. During Summer we’ll be back here a lot too, visiting Razz and everything.”

Kissing Adora’s jawline, Catra smirked, “Oh yeah? What if Spinnerella and Netossa and I go to like the Bahamas together or something? You’ll be visiting Razz on your own if that happens.”

The blonde ran her fingers through Catra’s hair, “Oh yeah? What makes you think Spinnerella and Netossa would take a little brat like you on their vacation?”

Sitting up, Catra challenged, “Wanna go? I’ll call them right now and let’s bet,” Adora cockily raised an eyebrow and watched as Catra took out her phone and started to FaceTime her moms. After around 3 rings, they picked up, “Hey moms!” Catra said happily.

“Catra! Adora!” Netossa grinned, “It’s been so long! How are you guys doing? Spinny and I miss the both of you a lot!”

The brunette scoffed, “No need to be dramatic, I literally called you last night. Plus I’m going to see you guys tomorrow!” 

Spinnerella got on camera and smiled at the two girls, “Hello girls! How are you two doing? Netty was about to have a crisis last night because you almost forgot to call us. But good thing you did Catra, or you would have never heard the end of it!”

The girl grinned and patted Adora on the back, “Yeah we’re doing good, Razz has been treating us well, she’s out running errands right now though. But we’re enjoying our stay here,” she coughed, “Anyways, I wanted to call you guys because I just wanted to know. If you two were going to the Bahamas or something, would you guys invite me?”

The two women exchanged a look and started to laugh, “The Bahamas? No way! If we were going to LA or something then sure. But not the Bahamas!” 

Adora bursted into laughter along with Spinnerella and Netossa while Catra just made a sour face. She scoffed, “Okay well, thanks for the help guys!” She said sarcastically, “I’ll be leaving now bye, love you!”

“Wait C-” The girl hung up before the woman got to finish what she said. 

Catra looked over at Adora who was still laughing. The girl rolled her eyes and pulled the blonde into a kiss to make her stop laughing. Pulling away from the kiss, Adora blushed and stuttered, “Th-that’s got to be the  _ nicest _ way to tell me to shut up.” 

Rolling her eyes, Catra got out of bed and stretched her arms, “Anyways, since Razz is out, I’m going to cook her a surprise dinner tonight,” Adora gave her a skeptical look, “I won’t burn down anything. Razz taught me some cooking basics a bit this week and I just want to return something back to her, since she’s been so kind to us.”

The blonde stood up too, “Do you need help?”

“Hell no,” Catra said, showing off her signature smirk, “But you can watch me cook, if you want.” Shrugging, Adora walked with Catra over to the kitchen. The brunette looked through the produce in the fridge and rubbed her chin, “Razz isn’t allergic to anything is she?”

Sitting on the counter, Adora dangled her legs, “Not that I know of.”

Rummaging through cabinets, Catra muttered, “I’ll take your word for it.” Adora watched her girlfriend take out a can of cream, chicken stock, parsley, carrots, garlic, onions, and some seasonings. Catra carefully cut her vegetables on a cutting board, she was still getting used to handling a kitchen knife.

“What are you making?”

The girl laughed, “Honestly, I have no idea. I’ll just throw all the ingredients together and hope that you guys won’t get food poisoning.”

Adora blinked and watched as Catra combined the can of cream and chicken stock in a pot, seasoning it with paprika, salt, pepper, chilli peppers, and some of the garlic that she chopped up before. Catra stirred the boiling soup carefully as she added the rest of her ingredients. 

As the stew simmered on low heat, Catra opened the fridge again and got out a bunch of different green vegetables. She cut them up and quickly made a dressing out of olive oil, garlic, dijon mustard, and maple syrup. The brunette did a chef's kiss after she plated everything neatly. 

“It smells good,” Adora smiled.

Catra walked over to her girlfriend and kissed her cheek, “Obviously it does,  _ I _ made it,” the front door opened and they saw Razz walking in, “Hey Razz! We made dinner for you,” she grinned.

The old woman put her purse down and hugged the two girls, “Is that what that delicious smell is?” Catra got out two bowls for everyone, one for the salad and one for the stew. They all sat together at the table and feasted.

Eating a spoonful of soup, Adora let out a sigh of satisfaction, “Wow! This is actually really good Catra! What do you think, Razz?”

Razz smiled at the brunette who sat across from her, “Art and music isn’t your only talent Catra dearie. This is great! And you had no recipe? Razz is impressed!”

_ Is it really that good?  _ Catra thought. The girl brought her spoon to her mouth and sipped her soup. She smiled at herself, pleased at what she made,  _ Ah… it’s warm.  _

  
  
  


After eating dinner with Razz, Adora and Catra walked back to their room and laid down on the bed. Catra stared at the ceiling, “I can’t believe we’re going back to BMU tomorrow…” the blonde smiled at her and ran her fingers through Catra’s fluffy hair, “I can’t believe that this school year is almost over too… It felt like it went by so quickly but at the same time so slowly. If that even makes sense.”

“I think I know what you mean,” Adora said, kissing Catra’s jawline, “It’s been one hell of a year,” she whispered.

Catra hummed, “Yeah… we’ve both been through a ton of shit huh?” Adora looked over at the girl who just kept staring at the ceiling, “I know I’ve grown a lot, but sometimes I wonder if I’m really cured from depression… What if it comes back? What if I fuck up again? I don’t want to mess anything up anymore…”

Holding Catra’s hand, Adora muttered, “Catra… I’m not a therapist, but I know that depression  _ can’t _ be cured,” the brunette looked at Adora who was looking at her with sad eyes, “However, it  _ can _ be treated. You’ve grown so much Catra, I am  _ so _ proud of you. But, it’s different for each person, sometimes people can just move on quickly from what happened to them. Sometimes people may still have symptoms. But that doesn’t make them weak. You know what I mean?”

Smiling softly at Adora, Catra nodded her head, “Yeah… I get what you mean. Thanks, that makes me feel a bit better,” Adora smiled at her and the girl thought to herself,  _ What Adora just said… It made me feel warm inside? I don’t know.  _ “Honestly, life is pretty nice right now,” Adora looked up at her and raised an eyebrow, “Because I’m in love with you.”

Blushing, Adora dug her face in Catra’s shoulder so she couldn’t see how red she was, “Shut up! You’re so sappy!” Catra stuck out her tongue and kissed Adora’s forehead. Cuddling with each other, Adora spoke softly, “Do you want to watch something?” 

“Like what?”

The blonde smiled at her, “Well, I heard that  _ Adventure Time  _ came out with a movie about Bubbline. It was all over my Twitter feed a few months ago but I never had the time to watch it. I heard it was  _ really _ good. You want to watch it right now?” 

Catra smiled back, “Yeah, sure why not. We haven’t had a Cartoon Night in a while.”

Laughing, Adora kissed her girlfriend, “Oh my god! You’re so right! Now we  _ have _ to watch it!” 

The brunette watched as Adora was taking out her laptop from her luggage and crossed her arms, “We were going to watch it anyways.” They got a blanket large enough for the both of them and Adora sat next to Catra under the covers, cuddling with her. 

Watching the scene where Bubblegum and Marceline were living their best lives in Marceline’s cottage and Catra laughed, “Oh my god! Adora they’re cottagecore lesbians! Well, I guess technically they’re bisexual.”

Adora snorted, “You think when we grow up we’ll be like them?”

Turning a scarlet red, Catra hid her face from Adora and thought,  _ Oh my god, does that mean she wants to marry me? Oh my god. Wait, am I just overthinking this like usual? No way right? But Marcy and Bonnie are immortal so they are living together forever and technically marriage is like living together forever so does that mean- _

“You good?” Adora said, interrupting Catra’s thoughts.

“Y-yeah… I’m good,” Catra said, still blushing like crazy.

Turning her girlfriend’s face towards her, Adora peered at her, “Oh my god! Were you blushing? Am I embarrassing you?”

Looking away from Adora, Catra mumbled, “No…”

Planting kisses all over Catra’s face, Adora grinned, “Are you sure?” She said in her obnoxious over confident voice.

Catra groaned and pointed at the laptop screen which was still playing the movie, “Ugh! Just shut up and watch the movie dammit!” 

They continued to watch the movie in silence, with a couple of flirtatious remarks here and there and soon they finished the 44 minute movie, “Y’know, you kinda remind me of Marceline,” Adora said, putting away her laptop. 

“Why’s that? Is it because I’m a hot musician that could probably kill a bitch?” Catra said.

The blonde laughed, “Well, that’s part of the reason,” Catra hummed, “Both of you guys just act so tough and strong, which is true. But when it comes to your girlfriends,” Adora said, nudging Catra’s arm, “You guys are just both softies.”

Catra laughed, “Got me there princess,” she rested her head on Adora’s shoulder and the girl held her close. Slowly getting tired, Catra started to close her eyes and sunk into Adora’s embrace. She cuddled with Adora and smiled to herself when she kissed her goodnight. 

Though the soup that she made for dinner warmed her like a hug, there was nothing better than sleeping peacefully in her girlfriend’s arms.  _ Ah…  _ Catra thought to herself, 

_ It’s warm.  _

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG THIS WAS SUCH A ROLLERCOASTER RIDE OF A FIC! THESE TWO GIRLS HAVE BEEN THROUGH IT HUH? ANYWAYS OMG im just so shocked that this is already over these last 29 days have flew by so quickly holy shit. i want to thank you guys SO SO SO SO much for all of the love and support that you have given me and this story! i never thought that this story would blow up like this too! like holy shit im so shocked! SO THANK YOU GUYS SO MUCH I COULDN'T HAVE DONE IT WITHOUT YOU!!! you guys are so great! i loved seeing all of the support in the comments omg! anyways yeah this was such a rollercoaster of a story and im SO glad that you guys liked it! anyways if you guys like my works please subscribe to me i have a really cool one shot idea coming out that i'll post next week! anyways omg i cant believe this is over but thank you guys AGAIN and i hope you all have a fantastic morning/afternoon/evening! i love you all! <3 :)


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